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翻 译 唐墨笙 Anonymity117 易碎的绝对
翻 译 Yang_Solitary omiyask617 527泡芙
校 对 草草 苏葵
时间轴 壬虚浪影
后 期 雷鸣
总 监 苏葵
你介意我快速检查一下吗 Do you mind if I have a quick check?
我是医生 大概应该先说这个 I'm a doctor. Probably should have said.
这里是妇产科 也被称之为仔逼科 This is obs and gynae, also known as brats and twats.
前情提要
我的舌头全是小点 My tongue is totally covered in spots.
你这种症状叫做味蕾 What you have is taste buds.
让她出院回家 所以你给我妈打电话的时候 Send her home. So, who did you say you were
你说自己是谁来着 when you called my mother?
我说我是你室友 I said I was your flatmate.
但她知道我们只有一间卧室 She knows we've only got one bedroom.
别像过山车那么刺激 A little bit less Alton Towers.
你觉得我很垃圾吗 Do you think I'm rubbish?
你接生了几个孩子 How many babies have you delivered?
还记得我让你当代理主治医生吗 Remember when I asked you to be an acting registrar?
有点主治医生的样子 Try acting like a bloody registrar.
我很担心你的孩子 I'm very worried about your baby.
我需要马上给你接生 I'm going to have to deliver you immediately.
结果发现我不该让她回家 Turns out I probably shouldn't have sent her home.
快啊 Hurry up.
加油 Come on.
天呐 加把劲 Oh, my God, come on!
好了 够了 OK, that's enough.
我们重新把她剖开吧 Let's open her up again.
我不会让你这样做的 I'm not gonna let you do that.
你打算怎么阻止我呢 护士 And how exactly are you gonna stop me, Sister?
棉条经常不见 Swabs go missing all the time.
我们会找到的 We'll find it.
我不是在告诉你该怎么做 医生 I'm not telling you how to do your job, Doctor,
但是如果我们没找到棉条 你是不是该 but if we can't find the swab, shouldn't you...?
抱歉 我以为你不应教我该如何做我的工作 I'm sorry, I thought you weren't telling me how to do my job.
好了 全体成员 请检查你们的鞋子 OK, everybody, can you just check in your shoes
看看是不是掉进去了 just in case it's fallen in there?
你感觉怎么样 How are you doing?
你可能已经猜到了 As you've probably gathered,
我们找不到其中一根用于剖腹产的棉条了 we can't find one of the swabs that we used in the Caesarean,
所以我们打算检查一下看看那没有... so we're going to have to check that it isn't...
我们没把部分棉条留在你体内 ...that we haven't left it sort of inside you.
部分在我的体内 Sort of inside me?
整个在你体内 是这样 Sort of totally inside you, yeah.
它不会分解吗 And it wouldn't dissolve?
它会分解 是的 但很缓慢 It would, yes, slowly, though,
大概需要超过六千到七千年时间 over the next 6,000 or 7,000 years.
是这样的 抱歉 Yep. Sorry.
好了 剪刀 OK, erm, scissors.
止血钳 Blunt forceps.
看看我找到了什么 Look what I found.
你这个臭小偷 You thieving little fucker.
抱歉 特蕾茜 Apologies, Tracy.
也对爸爸说声抱歉 And apologies, Dad.
一切都还好吗 发生了什么 Is everything OK? What's going on?
一切都好 谢谢关心 偶然出现的背包男 Everything's fine, thanks, random man with a rucksack.
不是 我是说五号床的那个婴儿 No, I meant with the baby in...in Five.
我是接生他的医生 I'm the doctor who delivered him.
所以他 他还好吗 So is he, erm...? Is he OK?
并不 如果你还记得的话 你误诊了他的母亲 No. If you remember, you misdiagnosed his mother
所以他比预产期早出生15周 so he was delivered about 15 weeks too early.
不是 我是说 No, I meant with the, um...
腰椎穿刺正常吗 你们重复血液测试了吗 Was the lumbar puncture normal? Did you repeat the bloods?
你该干的活已经干完了 伙计 You've done your bit, mate.
现在轮到我们了 We're doing ours now.
你还在这啊 You still here?
我只是想确认点事 I was just checking something.
我们都会犯错 Yeah. We all make mistakes.
但这不意味着我们工作能力差 Doesn't mean that we're bad at our jobs.
如果我们从中学习 这些错误会让我们变得更好 If we learn from them, they're what makes us better.
好了 甘地 只是丢了根棉条 All right, Gandhi, it was a fucking lost swab.
不是那个 我说的是你去那里探望的错误 No, not that! The mistake you were visiting in there.
总之 快走吧 Anyway, get out of here.
你大概六小时前就该回家了吧 You should've been home, what, six hours ago?
棉伯特·德尼罗[罗伯特·德尼罗] Swab-ert De Niro.
什么 我会说小棉伯特·唐尼[小罗伯特·唐尼] What? Oh. I'd have gone with Swab-ert Downey Jr.
这个朱利安说过了... Yeah, Julian said that one, so...
哈利 你在外面干什么 Harry? What the fuck are you doing?
门坏了 The door's broken.
打不开 钥匙 Won't open. Keys...
-钥匙坏了 -什么 - Key's broken. - What?
我的老天 起来 For God's sake. Come on.
你脸上有点 食物残渣 You've got some, er, food on your face.
那大概是胎盘 That's probably placenta.
哈利 Harry...
你竟然把门修好了 Whoa, you fixed it.
工作如何 How was work?
很好 谢谢 进去 现在 上床 Fine, thanks. In. Now. Bed.
这是我的钱包 That's my wallet.
哈利 Harry...
吻我 Kiss me.
哈利 Harry...
好好好 Ok, ok, ok.
疼 痛 难 免 第二集
该死 抱歉 我把你吵醒了吗 Shit, sorry. Did I wake you?
-你在做什么 -织东西 - What are you doing? - Knitting.
你出征前我要不要给你做杯热可可 Shall I make you a cocoa before you head off to bridge?
哈利 Harry...
哈利 住手 Harry, stop.
-你在诱惑我上班迟到 -是的 - You're gonna make me late for work. - So I am.
这件衬衫可以吗 Is this shirt OK?
如果你之前织的毛衣就是为了盖住它 Assuming that's a jumper you were knitting to wear over it.
我今晚不会太晚回来 I shouldn't be back too late tonight.
很好 格雷格和艾玛会七点过来 Good. Greg and Emma will be here at seven,
所以你一定要在那之前回来 so make sure you're back by then.
话虽如此 这种事也不是板上钉钉的 对吧 Having said that, these things are fluid, aren't they?
你永远不知道什么时候会被叫去处理急诊 You never know when you'll be called for an emergency.
她没那么不好 She's not that bad.
和谁比 伊迪·阿明吗 Compared to who, Idi Amin?
乌干达第三任总统 奉行恐怖独裁统治
可能是时候不要和他讲 You know, it's probably about time you stop telling him
你有多讨厌她了 how much you hate her.
他们都要结婚了 They're getting married.
她怀了他的孩子 She's having his baby.
会很不错的 It'll be nice.
我要做法士达 I'm doing fajitas.
一种墨西哥食物
也不非得做法士达 Doesn't have to be fajitas.
你看起来一晚上没睡 You look like you haven't slept.
嗯 我得戒掉睡眠了 No, I've had to cut sleeping out.
睡眠对这些考试而言是不必要的消遣 It's an unnecessary distraction from these exams.
考试什么时候 When are they?
几周之后 A few weeks.
我学了四分之一的解剖学 And I have done a quarter of anatomy,
所以算多少 一条腿吧 so that's, what, a leg?
胚胎学和生物化学我还没开始看 I've not even started on embryology or biochemistry,
而且十分钟后我要和亚当一起值班 and I'm on call with Adam in ten minutes.
我不想让自己说的话得你妈一样 I don't wanna sound like your mum...
但是我现在该结婚了是吗 But I should be married by now?
听着 就这么一次去和亚当说让他自己值班 Look, tell Adam he can do it on his own for once.
以他目前的德行 得一天才能完成工作 And he's taking all day the way he's acting at the moment.
患者屁股上每一个斑都要做组织活检 He's doing biopsies on every freckle on a patient's arse
保证那些斑不会是罕见的日本黑素细胞痣 just in case it's some rare case of Japanese melanocytic.
再值一晚班我就能休息几天了 And, er, just one more night and I've got a few days off.
不知道该做点什么 I don't know what I'm gonna do.
让AJ见见妈妈也挺好的 It'll be nice for AJ to see her mum for a change.
特蕾茜 Tracy!
走吧 别看初中生物了 Come on, put your GCSE biology down.
该去干活了 We've got work to do.
你今天不如勇敢点自己去值班怎么样 Look, why don't you be a brave boy and go there on your own?
你说什么 Excuse me?
施卢蒂肯定想多看会书 I'm sure Shruti would like a little bit more time with her textbooks.
嗯 我还想要八千五百万和25厘米大屌呢 Yeah. And I'd like £85 million and a ten-inch cock
但是也只能想想 but, you know, can't win 'em all.
得了吧 棉条·马利[鲍勃·马利] Come on... Swab Marley.
行吧 OK, fine.
两小时后来妇科 Come up to gynae in two hours.
但我之后要考考你 But I'm gonna test you afterwards
你最好把头 肩膀 膝盖 脚趾都记住了 and I want you to know all of Heads, Shoulders, Knees And Toes.
一首儿歌
主歌和副歌都要 Verse and chorus.
听着 肯定没什么事 Look, honestly, I'm sure it's nothing.
她总是不当回事 She's always playing things down.
我放个屁你都觉得我要死了 You think I'm dying every time I fart.
她头掉了都不愿意吃止痛药 Her head could be hanging off and she'd refuse an aspirin.
我们听听医生怎么说吧 Maybe we should listen to what the doctor thinks.
我能摸你的肚子吗 Can I put a hand on your tummy?
-你的手冷吗 -有点 - How cold are they? - A bit.
挺好 That's good.
说明没有刚进过别人的下面 It means they ain't just been inside another patient, then.
没刚进过活人的下面 Means they haven't been inside a living patient.
好了 从零到十 你有多疼 Right. How bad's the pain on a scale of zero to ten,
零是完全不疼 十是锯掉自己的腿 where zero is no pain at all and ten is sawing your own leg off
还得听着麦可·布雷 while listening to Michael Buble?
差不多...三吧 Let's say...three.
切完辣椒揉眼睛 Chopping chillies and rubbing your eyes.
我就说吧 这明显是八 This is what I mean, that's clearly an eight.
我能掀开你的上衣吗 May I lift your top up?
天杀的 Oh, fucking Christ.
我没事 I'm fine.
好吧 我确实觉得有点问题 Right, I do think there might be something going on here.
跟你说怎么回事吧 我昨天晚上吃烤肉了 Tell you what it is. I had a kebab last night.
有海格的老二那么大 It literally looked like Hagrid's cock.
有种病叫卵巢扭转 And there's a condition called ovarian torsion,
也就是说卵巢自己拧住了 where the ovary gets twisted around on itself.
我想让你住院 I want to admit you to the ward,
尽快安排你做手术 get you round to theatre as soon as we can
-看看里面怎么回事 -手术 - and have a look inside. - An operation?
你认真的吗 这根本没事 Are you serious? It's nothing.
-我不觉得这没事 -听医生的话 - I don't think it's nothing. - Listen to the doctor.
他不确定也不会做手术 He wouldn't operate if he wasn't certain.
那你确定吗 百分之百确定吗 Are you certain, then? Like, 100%?
他不确定 我们走吧 Oh, look, he ain't. Come on, let's go.
医学里没有百分之百 Nothing in medicine is 100%,
但如果你回家 那就是违背我的忠告 but if you go home, that would be against my firm advice,
还有可能让病情恶化 失去一个卵巢 and you risk making this a lot worse and losing an ovary.
甚至...更糟 Or...worse.
-露丝 -如果你需要行李过夜 - Ruth. - If you need an overnight bag,
或许你朋友能回家帮你拿点东西 maybe your friend can pop home and get some stuff for you?
-不是朋友 -敌人吗 - Not friends. - Enemies?
民事伴侣 Civil partners.
天啊 我不是故意...抱歉 Goodness. I didn't mean... Sorry.
我猜你对这没什么意见 I presume you don't have a problem with that?
-当然没有 -还是别跟 - No. No, no, no. - Maybe don't pick a fight
要救你命的人吵架了吧 with the person who's trying to save your life.
他是这么说的 So he claims.
好 我们病房见 Good. Um, OK, I'll see you up on the ward.
带她去妇科 Let's get her up to gynae.
简直胡扯八道 他就是在耍我 Oi, this is total bullshit. He's taking the piss.
这是褥式缝合法吗 洛克哈特先生 Is that a mattress suture, Mr Lockhart?
-对 -真是优雅 - Yes. - It's very elegant.
别拍马屁了 朱利安 My rectum is clean enough already, thank you, Julian.
洛克哈特先生 病房里有个患者 Mr Lockhart, there's a patient on the ward
需要赶快动手术 I think we should operate on smart-ish,
你能批准一下吗 if you don't mind ticking the old box.
那就说来听听 Let's hear it, then.
我不知道你还会说腹语呢 洛克哈特先生 I never knew you were such a good ventriloquist, Mr Lockhart.
-两位 -患者26岁 - Boys. - Patient's 26 years old,
我刚从急诊收治 I've just admitted her from A&E
她急性腹痛 恶心想吐 with acute abdominal pain and nausea.
怀孕检测是阴性 Negative pregnancy test.
我检查的时候她疼得厉害 She's in significant pain when I examine her,
-全都指向卵巢扭转 -超声波呢 - all pointing to ovarian torsion. - Ultrasound?
急诊做了超声波 没有问题 A&E did an ultrasound, which was normal,
但是很明显这无法排除... but obviously that doesn't exclude...
你没事就给痛经的患者开刀吗 Do you normally operate on patients with period pains?
那真的不是痛经 It's really not period pains.
听着 你谨慎点是好事 Look, we're pleased you're being cautious.
换了我也会小心点 I'd be cautious too
毕竟你在这个职位上 差点害死一名患者 if I'd nearly killed one of my patients at your stage.
我们职位一样 朱利安 We're at the same stage, Julian.
不好意思 那上面代理两个字是打错了吗 Sorry. Is that a typo where it says acting registrar?
我想朱利安是在用他独特的方式说 I think what Julian is trying to say in his own special way
我们万不得已才动手术 is that we leave surgery as a last resort.
会有手术风险 Operative risks.
我知道什么是手术风险 给她拍片子行吗 I know what operative risks are. Can we just CT her?
我们可以给每个患者都拍片子 We could just CT every patient in the hospital
只要你决意让医院破产 if you're totally determined to bankrupt the place.
常见的事很常见 亚当 Common things are common, Adam.
如果你听到窗外有马蹄声 If you hear hooves clip-clopping outside of your bedroom window,
那有可能是斑马 it could be a zebra,
但实际点说 那只会是匹普通的马 but, realistically, it's gonna be a horse.
送回家 快点 Home. Now!
如果真是卵巢扭转怎么办 But if it is ovarian torsion?
送她回家 听话 Send her home, there's a good boy.
医生 Oi, Doctor!
不用急 伙计 我没事 Don't rush or anything, fella, I'm fine.
你准备什么时候开刀 What time you cutting me open, then?
其实我们决定不做手术了 把你送... We've decided in fact to not operate but to send you...
到这里 ...here.
把你送到这 观察一晚看看 To send you here and see how you get on overnight.
正好 我的女性伴侣 Luckily, my female sexual partner
正在帮我拿东西 is just fetching some stuff for me.
我之前无意冒犯 I didn't mean to be insensitive before.
-其实我也是同性恋 -真的吗 - I'm...gay too, actually. - Really?
听起来你好像从没说过这句话 Cos it sounds like you've never said that before.
我早上再回来 Well, I will, pop back in the morning
看你怎么样 and see how you're doing.
谁是第一个 Who's up first, then?
17号床的可老婆 The MOB in bed 17.
-可老婆 -可怜的老太婆 - MOB? - Miserable Old Bat.
不错吧 Is that a good one?
你不能就这么瞎编 You can't just make them up.
给我看看温尼卡太太的血检报告 Can I see Mrs Winnicka's bloods?
但是血检没问题 But they were normal.
好吧 Yeah.
好 稍等 Yeah, one sec.
她昨晚不大舒服 Yeah, she had a bit of a night of it.
胸痛发作了 Episode of chest pain.
住院医做了血检和心电图 The SHO did blood and an ECG.
我看了一下 都正常 I've had a look and they're all normal.
你为什么要这样 Why have you done this?
-什么 -把电脑焊在助行架上 - What? - Welded a laptop to a Zimmer frame.
不 他们把所有的病房电脑 No, they've replaced all the ward computers
全换成了带轮的电脑 with computers on wheels.
不换就怪了 Of course they fucking have.
那就打开吧 Turn it on, then.
我得先插上电源 I'm gonna have to plug it in.
电池只能坚持一分钟 Battery only lasts about a minute.
搜索 患者姓名 温尼卡
这东西要是再没用点 你就该失业了 If this thing was any more useless, you'd be out of a job.
-对 看这里 正常 -等等 - Yeah, look there. Normal. - Hang on.
对 没错 结果正常 Yeah. Yeah, it's normal.
好吧 去看看她 OK, let's go and see her.
带上你的新设备 And bring your new toy.
上帝老天爷啊 Christ alive.
医院有时候是个特别孤单的地方 It can be a lonely place in hospital
特别是没有亲友来访的时候 if you've got no friends or family visiting...
早 温尼卡太太 Morning, Mrs Winnicka.
你怎么把他带来了 Why you brought me this one?
我喜欢朱利安医生 嘴甜又高大 I prefer Dr Julian. Lovely and tall.
当你讨人嫌的时候也一样 ..or if you're a total bitch.
恐怕你只有我了 嘴臭还矮小 Well, you're stuck with me, I'm afraid, horrible and short.
昨晚到现在有胸痛吗 So, any more of that pain in the chest since last night?
-关你什么事 -你要是不幸身亡 我很没面子 - Why do you care? - Because it reflects very badly on me if you die.
没人在乎我是死是活 Nobody cares if I die.
说不好 Oh, I dunno.
狮子和衣柜可能会想念你吧[纳尼亚情节] The lion and the wardrobe would probably miss you.
那么 还有没有胸痛呢 Any more of that pain in the chest, then?
-不不 没有了 -那就好 - No, no more of that. - That's good.
再让心脏科医生来复诊一下 Let's get the cardiology doctors to review you,
确保万无一失 just to be on the safe side.
施卢蒂 能安排一下吗 Shruti, can you arrange that, please?
真的吗 但结果没显示有问题 Really? But we've had no positive test results.
我觉得不该... I don't think...
好的 当然 I mean, yeah, of course.
没问题 好的 That...that's fine. Yes.
感觉如何 How are you doing?
你是医生 You're a doctor.
别把工作推给我 Not doing bloody job for you.
这位英俊的男士是谁 Who's this handsome man?
他会来探访吗 Can we expect a visit?
要把他挖出来可不容易 Hell of a job digging him up.
老天 抱歉 Oh, God, sorry.
旁边两位制服男孩呢 What about the lovely strapping boys next to him?
如果他们也死了 我还是和他们一道上路的好 If they're dead as well, it'll be easier if I just join them.
这个工作很忙 This one busy with work.
这个还没想好借口 That one hasn't thought of excuse yet.
希望你可以很快出院 Well, hopefully you'll be out of here before too long.
我已经住院太久了 It's already too long.
这里太吵 It's so loud in here.
那个床位的女人味道太大 The woman in that bed stinks.
晚上都喝不到一杯威士忌 Can't even get a whisky at night.
-真是抱歉 -你很会道歉嘛 - I'm sorry. - Very good at being sorry, aren't you?
好吧 W太太 跟你聊天真愉快 OK. Well, uh, it's lovely talking to you, Mrs W.
我们明天再见 We'll see you tomorrow.
你没事吧 You ok?
我的住院医生不太听话 除此之外 My SHO's pretty insubordinate, but other than that...
要是我老拿无关紧要的病例玩狼来了 They're gonna stop accepting your referrals
他们可能不会再接你的转诊了 if I keep crying wolf with the unnecessary ones.
但这个患者很有必要 You see, this is a necessary one,
因为是我要求的 because I asked for it.
还有 帮个忙 Hey, do me a favour.
去买瓶威士忌 Get me a bottle of whisky.
给温尼卡太太 For Mrs Winnicka.
她今天可以出院吗 Can she go home today?
没法活着出院 Well, not alive.
还有那个急诊过来的患者 And that patient you've admitted from A&E.
要入院多久 How long's she likely to be here?
先监测一晚 We're monitoring her overnight
准备明早手术 with a view to operating in the morning.
你已经请示过主任医生了吗 And you've discussed this with your consultant?
当然 不然她也不会入院 对吗 Obviously, otherwise she wouldn't be here, would she?
妈 我能明天再打给你吗 Hi, Mum. Listen, can I call you tomorrow?
今晚不行 今晚要跟格雷格和艾玛吃饭 No, I can't tonight. I'm having dinner with Greg and Emma.
对 就我们三个 Yeah, just the three of us.
我知道你想让我和海伦结婚 妈 I know you hoped I'd marry Helen, Mum,
过去五年你每四十分钟就要提一次 you've mentioned it every 40 minutes for the last five years.
能聊点别的吗 Can we talk about something else?
这个不行 好了 妈 我要挂了 再见 Not that. Right, look, I'm going. Bye.
真是抱歉 So sorry.
不不不 不是我喝 给我上司买的 Oh, no, no. This isn't for me. It's for my boss.
不 他要送给患者的 No, he's gonna give it to one of the patients.
这是抗生素 So that's the antibiotic
用来治疗我们之前一直很担心的感染 to sort the infection that got everyone so worried before.
这个是... And that one is...
我也不知道这是什么 抱歉 No, don't know what that one is, sorry.
那个是 No, that one's the...
那才是抗生素 Yes, that one's the antibiotic.
说实话 剖腹产才是我的专长 I'm more of a Caesarean section kind of guy, to be honest.
在你身上我尽了全力 I really did try my best for you.
你相信我的 对吗 You believe me, right?
去他的 Bollocks.
糟了 Shit.
别叫了 拜托了 Just shush. Come on now.
糟了 Shit.
妈的 Fuck!
格雷格 Greg!
你是要进来还是在练习按喇叭 You coming in, or are you just practising your beeping?
你好 哥们 Hello, mate.
屋里见 I'll see you inside.
我先锁个车 Just gonna lock up.
真怀念你给贝琪上锁的样子 I've missed watching you lock up Betsy.
好像在看伦敦塔桥开启那样漫长 It's like watching Tower Bridge open up.
他出发了 凯医生代表大英帝国参赛 And he's off. Dr Kay representing Great Britain.
窗楔成功拔出 The window wedge came out in one.
他在绕路时损失了宝贵的时间 Well, he's lost valuable seconds on the walkaround
但他能否在车内锁做出弥补呢 but can he make it up on the inside door knob?
好的 现在只需全力摇晃 关上窗户 Yeah, well, now it's all to play for on the window shuffle.
凯选择了右手摇晃关窗 And now Kay has opted for a right-hand shuffle.
漂亮 That's beautiful.
工作怎么样 How was work?
对着不同的阴道做同样的事罢了 Same shit, different vagina.
-艾玛说很久没见你了 -是啊 - You know, Emma was saying she hasn't seen you for ages. - Yeah.
这段时间很愉快 It's been lovely.
礼貌点 Behave.
你知道没人会偷你那堆破烂吧 You do know no-one's gonna steal that, right?
你在想什么 What were you thinking?
这个患者怎么会需要转诊到心脏科 How did this patient possibly warrant a cardiology referral?
非常抱歉 我无意浪费你的时间 I'm really sorry, I didn't mean to waste your time.
你觉得这就够了吗 Do you really think that's good enough?
我病房里满满当当 全是真的心脏有问题的患者 I've got a ward full of patients with actual heart issues,
她的疼痛显然不是心脏问题 and her pain was clearly non-cardiac.
心电图和血检结果都正常 She had a normal ECG and normal bloods.
我十岁的孩子都能告诉你她没心脏病 My ten-year-old could have told you that.
对不起 I'm so sorry.
你的主治医生要是知道你这么做会怎么说 What would your registrar say if they knew you'd done this?
实际上...我... Well, actually... Um...I...
非常对不起 All I can do is apologise.
-你叫什么名字 -施卢蒂 - What's your name? - Shruti.
-阿查理雅 -我会给你的主任医生写信 - Acharya. - I'll be writing to your consultant,
施卢蒂·阿查理雅 Shruti...Acharya.
我只是需要放个假 I just need a holiday.
我都不记得我们上次在这个国家连续待两个月 I can't remember the last time we've been in the country
是什么时候的事 更别提连续待三个月 for two months straight, let alone three.
我们都需要晒晒太阳 对吗 We all need a hit of sun, don't we?
格雷格希望我们回巴巴多斯 Greg wants us to go back to Barbados,
但我担心大家圣诞节都会去那里 but I'm worried that's what everyone does at Christmas.
天啊 是的 Oh, God, yeah.
如果我不得不再次在巴巴多斯过圣诞节 If I have to spend one more Christmas in Barbados,
我会... I'm just gonna...
你们听说亚当的脱套伤故事吗 Have you guys heard Adam's degloving story?
-不 没听过 -你们会喜欢的 - No, I don't think so. - Oh, you will love it.
说吧 Go on.
脱套伤是一种皮肤 So, degloving's when the skin
从皮下结构上撕裂下来的严重损伤 gets torn from the underlying structures,
比如当摩托车手从车上摔下来 like when a motorcyclist flies off his bike
他的手就会... and his hand goes...
-我们非得讲这个吗 -当然 - Do we have to? - We certainly do.
有个十八岁的男孩 So, there's this 18-year-old guy,
外出庆祝自己高考考了个好成绩 he's out celebrating his A-level results
醒来时发现自己在公交候车亭顶上跳舞 and he finds himself dancing on the roof of a bus shelter.
为了下来 And to get down to ground level,
他抱着路灯柱 像考拉一样往下滑 he slides down a lamppost, koala-bear-style.
很不幸 他误判了路灯柱的材质 Unfortunately, he's misjudged the texture of the lamppost
他被送进急诊室 and he finds himself in A&E
双手严重擦伤 with severe grazing to both hands...
阴茎也完全脱套 ...and a complete degloving of his penis.
-天啊 -那什么样 - God. - So what did it look like?
那是我见过最糟糕的阴茎 It was far and away the worst penis I've ever seen.
他见过许多阴茎 And he's seen a lot of penises.
-当然 是专业方面 -那什么样 - Professionally, of course. - So, what did it look like?
-有点像意大利面 -我们能别聊这个了吗 - It's like a bit of spaghetti. - Can we stop?
拌上番茄酱 Smeared in tomato sauce.
-我们在吃饭 -还会长出来吗 - We are eating. - Will it grow back?
-怎么 像章鱼一样吗 -格利高里 - What, like an octopus? - Gregory...
-也许呢 -格利高里 够了 - Well, maybe. - Gregory, enough!
请别说了 Please.
翻修进展如何 So...um, how are the renovations coming on?
天啊 你知道建个地下室什么样 Oh, my God, you know what it's like, digging a basement.
不知道 我想我们的房东可能会投诉 Not really. I think our landlord might complain.
还有楼下的邻居 And the downstairs neighbours.
混乱不堪 压力巨大 全是噪音 Loads of mess, loads of stress, loads of noise.
如果下一个地板拼装工还让我们失望 If we get let down by one more marbler,
我想我会大发雷霆 I think I'm gonna go spare.
我上周在约翰·路易斯百货看到你妈了 I saw your mum in John Lewis last week.
-天啊 对不起 -没事的 - Oh, God, I'm sorry. - It was all right.
我躲在一个假人后面 I hid behind a mannequin.
如果我在约翰·路易斯遇到你妈一定认不出来 I wouldn't recognise your mum if I bumped into her in John Lewis.
你会的 房间温度会瞬间降低十度 Yeah, you would. Room gets about ten degrees colder.
-再来点玛格丽塔酒 -好的 谢谢 - Margaritas. - Yes, please. Thank you.
-不用了 -喝点吧 - Whoopsie! No. - Oh, go on.
这会让你放松下来 It'll loosen you up.
抱歉 当然 再来点柠檬水吗 Sorry, of course. More lemonade?
非常感谢 That would be lovely.
对 婚礼上我没法喝香槟 Yeah, there's no champagne for me at the wedding, alas.
真可惜 Such a shame.
这小家伙已经给我们找麻烦了 Our little munchkin's causing us trouble already.
妈妈不能喝香槟 No champagne for Mummy.
你现在怀孕几周了 So, how many weeks are you now?
-21周 -真棒 - 21. - Exciting.
差不多 已过半程了吧 I'm gonna say, what, halfway there?
你还真会听我说话啊 You do listen.
是男孩还是女孩 And is it a boy or a girl?
-好吧 -我们选择不提前知道 - Yeah. - We chose not to find out.
对 生活中所剩的惊喜已不多 Yeah. There are just so few surprises left in life.
如果最终由亚当给你接生会不会很奇怪 Wouldn't it be funny if Adam ended up delivering you?
宁死不从 Over my dead body!
统计上说 我的患者至少有一半都活着 Statistically, at least half my patients live, actually.
稳妥起见 我们要去私立医院 We're gonna play it safe and go private.
到目前为止 一切都还好吗 And is everything going well so far?
是的 我们上周做了22周产检 Yep, we had the 22-week scan last week.
一切看起来挺好 All seemed good.
我们做了5D彩超 We had the 5D scan.
所以你去私立医院 So when you go private,
他们还能多发现两个维度吗 they discover two extra dimensions?
-看看吧 -所以呢 - Have a look. - So...?
你觉得怎么样 How does it look to you?
是的 Yeah.
她看起来很完美 She looks perfect.
她吗 She?
你中什么邪了 What the fuck's gotten into you?
你这话什么意思 What's that supposed to mean?
-你知道你让他们很生气吧 -是的 - You do know you really upset them? - Oh, yeah.
我真为格雷格感到难过 I feel really terrible for Greg
还有他完美的生活 with his perfect little life.
你嫉妒他吗 You're jealous of him?
所以你才这么做吗 Is that what this is about?
亚当 他就像个五十岁的老头 Adam, he's cosplaying as a 50-year-old.
用他们的大房子 Rubbing my face in it with their big house
豪华婚礼和能开的车让我难堪 and their fancy wedding, and car that works.
那就去金融城找份工作 Go get a job in the City, then.
我不是这个意思 That's not what I mean.
他们太... They're just so...
安定 ...settled and...
太正常 ...normal.
如果正常对你来说这么重要 If normal's so important to you,
你为什么毁了两周来 why have you ruined the first evening
我们共同度过的第一个夜晚 we've had together in a fortnight?
普通夫妇没彼此见过家长吗 Haven't normal couples met each other's parents?
讲述吸血鬼女孩和人类男孩相爱的动画电影
行 我们下次就去精灵旅社 Fine - next time we're in Transylvania.
亚当 Adam...
出什么事了 What's going on?
没什么 Nothing.
我要去睡了 我明天要早起 I'm going to bed. I've an early start.
-我七点左右回来 -我今晚要出去 - I'll be back seven-ish. - I'm going out tonight.
我不想让你压力太大 I don't mean to load this all on you,
但你能快点好起来吗 but can you hurry up and get better, please?
我想这对我们来说都好 I think it'd be good for both of us.
我医术其实挺高超 I'm actually good at my job.
大部分时间是 Most of the time.
不过你并不想听这些 Anyway, you don't want to hear all this.
这只是... It's just...
你就专心学习如何眨眼吧 You just focus on learning how to blink.
亚当医生 Dr. Adam!
你还没见过我姐姐宝拉吧 I don't think you've met my sister, Paula.
没有 你好 很高兴见到你 Oh, no. Hello. Lovely to meet you.
你好 亲爱的 Hello, darling.
我非常想你 I missed you so much.
抗生素开始见效了 And the, uh, antibiotic's starting to work,
-这算是个好消息 -没错 - so that's a bit of good news. - Yes.
他们昨晚又给他称了一次 And they weighed him again last night
他有将近两英石重了[25斤] and he's nearly two stone, so...
1英石=14英磅
两英磅[1.8斤] Two pounds.
我觉得应该是英石 I think...I think it was stone.
看哪 Look!
看看你都长多大了 Look how big you're getting.
我有样东西要给他 I've actually got something for him.
你真是太体贴了 That's so kind of you.
这肯定花了你一大笔钱吧 They must have cost you a fortune.
我... I...
我自己织的 I knitted them.
等他长大后就穿了 That's something for him to grow into.
但愿如此 Hopefully.
看看亚当医生做了什么 我真的好爱你 Look what Dr Adam made. I love you so much.
妈妈真的真的好爱你 Mummy loves you so, so much.
我不知道它是怎么卡得那么死 I don't know how it's got so stuck up there.
它肯定是自己转了个方向 It must have turned around on itself
或者是落到了某种架状突起上什么的 or must be sitting on some kind of ledge, or something.
你真的不能告诉我那是什么吗 And there's no way you can tell me what it is?
不不 我想给卡尔一个惊喜 Oh, no, no, I want it to be a surprise for Carl.
我们总是在给对方惊喜 We're always surprising each other.
是的 他本来自己就能掏出来的 Yeah, he'd have got it out himself
要是他的手指没那么粗短的话 if he didn't have such stubby fingers.
我全家都这样 你知道吗 It's the same with me whole family, you know?
差不多可以算脚趾了 Practically toes.
行了 让我来看一下 好吗 Right, let's, uh, have a look, shall we?
你猜是什么 What do you reckon?
一瓶潘诺酒吗 A bottle of Pernod?
沃克斯豪尔科莎的变速杆 The gear stick from a Vauxhall Corsa?
还是巴克拉瓦混装 A selection of baklava?
土耳其传统甜点
猜中健达奇趣蛋的加十分 That's ten points to anyone who guessed Kinder Egg.
别 别 别 Hey, no, no, no, no.
别把它扔了 卡尔 打开它 Don't throw it away. Carl, open it.
天哪 Oh, God.
卡尔·莫肯 Carl Morcom...
你愿意跟我结婚吗 ..will you marry me?
答应她 兄弟 Say yes, mate.
她要是能把奇趣蛋塞进去 If that's what she does with a Kinder Egg,
鬼知道她被你拒绝后会做出什么 God knows what she'd do to you if you say no.
我当然愿意 苔丝 亲一个 Course I will, Tez. Come here.
祝贺二位 Congratulations.
不愧是 不愧是她 医生 不愧是你 This is so... This is so her, Doc. This is so you.
医生 你走之前 Doc, before you go,
能不能给我们俩拍张照 求你了 will you...will you take a picture of us, please?
我拍不了 我的大拇指够不着按钮 I can't. My thumbs won't reach the buttons.
没问题 Of course.
好了 There you go.
太谢谢你了 Thank you so much.
我是全世界最幸运的男人 I'm the luckiest man in the world.
再次祝贺 Congratulations again.
谢谢 Thank you.
老是把鼻子埋进书里 Always with your nose in a book.
你可能还没学到鼻子 You probably haven't got there yet.
鼻子是你脸部前端的尖状部位 Your nose is the pointy bit on the front of your face.
心脏科医生给温尼卡太太看过了吗 Did cardiology see Mrs Winnicka?
-他们认为一切正常 -很好 - They were satisfied that nothing was going on. - Great.
看 没人介意别人的请求 See, no-one minds being asked.
走吧 Come on.
你要干什么 What do you want?
我们是医生 We're the doctors.
我知道你是医生 我问的不是这个 I know who you are. That's not what I asked.
-胸部还在疼吗 -没有 - Any more of that chest pain? - No.
很好 That's good.
你不想睡前小酌一杯吗 You didn't fancy a nightcap?
当然不 杰克丹尼和猫尿一个味 Of course not. Jack Daniel's tastes like cat's piss.
店里没有鲜榨蝾螈眼汁了 Well, they were fresh out of eye of newt.
滚开 Piss off.
明天见 W太太 See you tomorrow, Mrs W.
你是不是有什么事要告诉我 Anything you'd like to tell me?
-滚蛋 -想象一下 - Fuck off. - Imagine my surprise
今早贝琳达通知我那位痛经的患者 when Benilda informed me that the patient with period pains
还在病房里时 我有多惊讶 was still on the ward this morning.
我吩咐过你让她出院回家 I instructed you to send her home.
我真心觉得你不应该无视她的症状 I really don't think you should be ignoring her symptoms.
我真心觉得你不该无视我和洛克哈特先生 I really don't think you should be ignoring me and Mr Lockhart.
顺便说一句 他对此事很不满 Who isn't pleased about this, by the way.
他是在早上你去给他送苹果时说的吗 Did he tell you that when you put an apple on his desk this morning?
-成熟点 亚当 -我们为什么就不能 - Grow up, Adam. - Can't we just leave her
让她再留院观察一晚呢 in another night for observation?
相信我 她真的... Trust me, she's really...
没人相信你 我让她出院回家了 No-one trusts you. I sent her home.
你曾让一个患者在错误的时间出院 You discharged one patient when you shouldn't have.
那并不意味着你得让其他所有患者 That doesn't mean you should keep every other patient
一直留在这 in here forever.
你很幸运能从亚当身上吸取经验教训 You're lucky to have Adam to learn from.
不要犯他的错误 Don't do what he does.
喂 我是亚当 Hi, it's Adam.
那就给她用扑热息痛 Well, give her bloody paracetamol, then.
哥们 帮我个忙 Hey, mate, do me a favour.
给我抽一根 Give me one of those.
别碰我 Oh, don't touch me!
靠 Fuck!
走开 Fuck off.
露丝 露丝 等等 Ruth! Ruth, wait.
施卢蒂 给我在紧急手术室准备一个位置 Shruti, get me a spot in emergency theatres now.
卵巢扭转 情况紧急 Ovarian torsion, starved and ready.
没错 就是那个 Yep, that's the one.
什么 What?
我才不管朱利安说了什么 I don't give a shit what Julian said.
好的 进去 Yep. In.
百分之百的把握 100% sure.
或者一半的把握 Or 50% sure.
如果不是卵巢扭转的话 And if it's not an ovarian torsion,
只要我还在手术室 while I'm in theatres,
我总是能临时表演一下切断自己的头 I can always perform an emergency cutting my own head off.
医院登记号是8744352 Hospital number 8744352.
好的 非常感谢 Yeah, great. Thank you so much.
谢谢 再见 Thank you, bye.
抓钳 Grasper.
麻烦了 Please.
好了 下注吧 Right, place your bets.
操 Oh, shit.
一切正常 It's bloody normal.
那不是好事吗 Isn't that good?
她是没事 It's all right for her.
-操 -请你在手术室里 - Fuck! - If you wouldn't mind
注意一下自己的言词 医生 watching your language in theatre, please, Doctor.
对不起 护士 操 Sorry, Sister. Fuck.
去他妈的上帝 Jesus fucking H Christ.
好的 现在要做一些更正 Right, well, here's some revision for you.
完全正常的骨盆解剖就是这个样子 This is what perfectly normal pelvic anatomy looks like.
他们来了 棒极了 时间刚刚好 And here they are. Great, right on cue.
离开手术室 亚当 Get out of theatre, Adam.
施卢蒂 你打电话给我是对的 Shruti, you did the right thing calling me.
行了 清洗之后缝合伤口 Right, scrub in, get this closed up.
摄像关掉 滚出去 Camera off, bugger off.
我过后再来处置你 I'll deal with you afterwards.
等等 Oh, hold on.
腹腔有游离液体 There's some free fluid in the abdomen,
有状况 something's going on.
朱利安 给我一副八号手术刀 Julian, grab me a pair of size eights.
我并不相信的上帝 谢谢你 Thank you, God that I don't believe in.
刚才有些亵渎神明 我很抱歉 I'm sorry about the mild blasphemy just before.
-起开 -抱歉 - Out the way. - Oh, yeah, sorry.
找到问题了 Well, there's your answer.
看这带蒂肌瘤脱垂得多厉害 Look how pedunculated that ovary is
表面布满了血管 and see how vascular it is on the surface.
肌瘤蒂一直在前后扭转 It's been twisting backwards and forwards on itself.
她一定疼的要死 She must've been in a right state.
好眼力 小伙子 Good spot, young man.
-谢谢 -我们应该能轻松搞定 - Thank you. - I think we can have a decent swing at saving this.
-你做过卵巢固定术吗 -还没做过 - You ever done an oophoropexy before? - Not yet, no.
我做过一些 我可以示范给他看 I've done a few if you want me to walk him through it.
非常感谢 朱利安 Thank you very much, Julian,
不过没有你应该也能行 but I suspect we'll be fine without you.
谢谢 朱利安 Thank you, Julian.
-亚当 -在 洛克哈特先生 - Adam. - Yes, Mr Lockhart.
再植入一个探头 So put another port in.
对 小心别碰到肠道 Right. Try not to get the bowel.
-是这样吗 -是的 可不能搞错方向 对吧 - That right? - Yes, you don't want to go the other way, do you?
我很荣幸 洛克哈特先生 It's a great honour, Mr Lockhart.
少来 好了 应该完成了 Please! Right, you're done, I think.
-你满意吗 -你呢 - You're happy? - Are you?
我是很满意 不过这不是我的子宫 Well, I'm happy, but it's not my ovary.
感谢你抽空前来 洛克哈特先生 Thank you for taking the time, Mr Lockhart.
-真的很感激 -行了 - It's deeply appreciated. - Right, come on.
再说下去可要在这待一整天了 We don't want to be here all day.
搞定 半小时后来我办公室一趟 好吗 There we are. Pop by my office in half an hour, will you?
我有件小事情要和你说 I've got a little something I'd like to talk to you about.
好的 谢谢 洛克... OK, thank you, Mr Lock...
谢谢 Thank you.
99便士 99p.
给你 There you go.
你在盯什么看呢 What are you staring at?
-亚当 我真的很抱歉 -为什么抱歉 - Adam, I'm really sorry. - What about?
因为你告发我 因为你不相信我 That you grassed me up? That you didn't trust me?
-还是因为你错了 -不是那样的 - Or that you were wrong? - It wasn't like that.
你不明白 我当时完全... You don't understand. I was completely...
我知道你在做什么 I know exactly what you were doing.
为自己着想 Looking after number one.
我是在为患者着想 I was looking out for the patient
因为你心神不宁疑神疑鬼 while you were on your mad, paranoid fishing trip.
自从漏诊那例子痫前期 你就一直那样 It's been like that ever since you missed that pre-eclamptic.
你今天是做对了一件事 没错 You got one thing right today, sure,
但就因为你和你愚蠢的转诊安排 but I've got a black mark on my record now
我的档案现在有了一个污点 because of you and your crazy referrals.
抱歉 我只是累了 Sorry, I'm just tired.
对不起 I'm sorry.
我不应该说那些话 I shouldn't have said that.
还是朋友吗 Friends?
同事 Colleagues.
朋友 Friends.
我今晚正好有空 I'm actually free tonight
如果你需要人帮你测试那些知识 if you want someone to test you on all of that stuff.
真的吗 你不介意吗 Seriously, would you mind?
只是这些东西我根本记不住 It's just none of it's going in.
是的 我都忘了曾经 Sure, I forget that there was a time
我也有不懂这些的时候 when I didn't know all of this stuff, either.
应该是七岁的时候吧 I think I was seven.
洛克哈特先生要表扬我 Mr Lockhart wants to give me a pat on the back,
见完他我就来找你 so I'll come and grab you when I'm done.
带了一瓶十年老酒开了喝 Got a ten-year-old bottle of cat piss we can crack open.
N.T.R. 洛克哈特先生
请进 Come.
做得很好 凯 Lovely work there, Kay.
你这小子是个好医生 对吧 You're a good little doctor, aren't you?
听起来像童书作家伊妮德·布莱顿笔下的人物 Sounds a bit like I'm an Enid Blyton character,
不过我接受 but I'll take it.
是的 我... Well, I've, erm...
我的师父是最好的嘛 I've been trained by the very best.
你在伦敦读的书吗 Did you study in London?
没错 Sure did, yeah.
第三代 Third generation.
-你有孩子了吗 -没有 - You got any kids? - Er, no.
结婚了吗 Married?
没有 No.
我有一个谈了很久的对象 I'm in a long-term relationship.
你女朋友是做什么的 What does your girlfriend do?
其实 平面设计 Actually, erm, graphic design.
很好 你知道这些是什么吗 That's sweet. Do you know what these are?
我猜是小宝宝 I'm gonna go with babies.
每一个我接生的妈妈 我都找她们要一张照片 I ask every mum I deliver to give me a picture.
那是我治疗的第一个 That's the first case of twin-to-twin transfusion syndrome
双胎输血综合征 I looked after.
用内倒转术 Internal podalic version.
那可太了不起了 That's really wonderful.
还有这个 在瓦勒迪泽尔芝士火锅店外 And this one's outside a fondue station in Val-d'Isere.
这份工作有很多糟心事 所以 Lot of crap in this job, so,
糟心事来的时候想想美好的事物很有益处 it's nice holding on to the good things when they happen.
范·赫根 Van Hegan.
前几周那例子痫早期25周早产儿 The pre-eclamptic 25-weeker from a couple of weeks back.
恐怕是个坏消息 Yeah, bit of bad news, I'm afraid.
那位妈妈投诉了 The mum's lodged a complaint.
你之后要填写报告 You'll be getting the paperwork through in a bit.
我只是想给你提醒下 I just wanted to give you the heads-up,
这样你就能开始写报告了 so you can start writing your statement, all that business.
振作点 你不会丢掉工作的 Cheer up, you're not gonna lose your job.
只是找下份工作的话会更加困难 Just might make it harder to get the next one.
别让我耽误你滚蛋了 Well, don't let me stop you from pissing off
我也好回家了 so I can go home.
门关上 Shut the door.
再见 Bye.
新信息 亚当 抱歉 改天再约
你不是说今晚不在家吗 Thought you said you were gonna be out tonight.
后来我觉得最好还是在家呆着 Then I realised I'd rather be in.
如果我是普勒斯顿的女朋友 If I was Preston's girlfriend,
我会在你攻击我的时候打烂你的脸 I'd chore the face off you when you came at me.
-拉我胳膊 -拉他的胳膊 - Pulling my arms. - Pulling his arms.
我会把他的老二剁掉 I'd cut his cock off.
这一切让我知道名人 All this is teaching me is that famous people
和普通人一样 只是更无聊 are the same as normal people, just much more boring.
这些人里有一半人都不算名人 Could hardly describe half these people as famous.
工作怎么样 How was work?
挺好的 It's fine, yeah.
你知道我们已经在一起两年了吗 You know we've been going out for two years?
是吗 Really?
天啊 感觉不止两年 God, feels like longer.
感觉有十年了 Feels like ten.
也许换成异性恋时间就是十年了 你觉得呢 Maybe it is ten in straight years, do you think?
我能察觉到有事不对劲 I know when something's up.
你有心事 对吗 There is something, right?
哈利 Harry?
怎么了 Yeah?
你愿意和我结婚吗 Will you marry me?
不愿意 No.