-姓名 -查尔斯·麦吉尔 - Name. - Charles McGill.
拜访委托人 Client visit.
看看这是谁 Here's Johnny!
我就知道你会来的 Hey, I knew you'd come.
见到你真高兴 All right. You're a sight for sore eyes.
你看起来不错 You're looking good.
吉米 Jimmy.
让你大老远跑来真是不好意思 Sorry you had to come all this way.
费了不少时间吧 It's a long way, right?
-是不少 -辛苦了 - It's a long way. - Yeah. Sorry.
关于阿尔布开克我只知道两件事 Only two things I know about Albuquerque:
第一 兔八哥应该向左转 Bugs Bunny should have taken a left turn there.
第二 就算给我一百次机会 And give me 100 tries,
我也拼不对这个地名 I'll never be able to spell it.
不过你也看得出 Anyway as you can see,
我现在遇到点小麻烦 I'm in a-a bit of a pickle.
谁都看得出 You certainly are.
别管什么财产损失和袭击指控了 Forget the property damage and assault charges.
你在大家眼里就是个性侵犯 吉米 You face being labeled a sex offender, Jimmy.
一旦定罪 If that happens,
你一辈子都摆脱不了 it'll follow you for the rest of your life.
这毫无道理 That is insane, okay?
这就是故意栽赃的狗屁罪名 查克 Th-that is a trumped-up load of horse crap, Chuck.
-你也信 -你想让我这么告诉法官 - Come on. - Is that what I tell the judge --
"故意栽赃的狗屁罪名" "Trumped-up load of horse crap"?
我又不是律师 I'm not the lawyer here, okay?
就是个小把戏而已 But it was a simple Chicago Sunroof.
性侵犯 这都算不上... Sex offender? That's not even remotely a--
我们来谈谈策略吧 L-let's talk strategy, okay?
我需要你施展自己的魔法 Cause I need you to work your magic
把这事解决了 and make this whole situation go poof.
你有什么计划吗 别这样 Y-you got a plan of attack? Come on.
我知道给你添了不少麻烦 I know I haven't made it easy for you,
但你是无所不能的 but you are, you are the man!
我知道你心里已经想好了 Right? I know you got a million legal loopholes
一大堆可以钻的法律空子 that we can dance through,
一大堆可以玩的把戏 big bag of tricks, you know?
巧妙运用法律的技术性细则 Any clever technicalities,
再加上"合理怀疑"之类的 行了 查克 and reasonable-doubt type stuff? Come on, Chuck.
我们应该有五年没见了吧 I haven't seen you in what, five years?
我们几乎没有你的消息 We barely hear from you.
现在你把自己弄进了牢里 Now that you're in it up to your neck,
你却没胆自己打给我 you can't even call me yourself,
反而让妈妈来找我 you have mom call me?
是老妈自己要打给你的 Mom took it upon herself to call you!
我只是告诉她我在哪里 I was just letting her know where I was.
-你没在电话里跟她哭诉吗 -怎么可能 - You didn't cry to her on the phone? - What? No.
你没有哭着向她求助 You didn't cry and beg mom for help?
怎么可能 What? Jesus!
我只说了她想听的话而已 She hears what she wants to hear, okay?
我从库克县监狱打付费电话给她 I'm gonna cry on a pay phone
就为了在电话里哭诉 in the middle of Cook County Jail.
想都别想 Jesus!
我们来谈谈上庭策略吧 Can we, can we talk strategy here?
听着 Look...
我知道我是个讨人厌的弟弟 I know I'm a lousy brother.
我是个讨厌的弟弟 总是把事搞砸 I'm a lousy brother. I'm a big screw-up.
如果我是个更出色的人 And if I was just a better person,
我不仅会停止让你失望 I would not only stop letting you down--
我还会停止让自己失望 you know what? I'd stop letting me down.
是时候 And it's about time
我让咱们俩都感到自豪了 that I started to make both of us proud.
我说的对吗 Am I right?
-狱警 -等等 - Guard. - Wait.
查克 等等 等等 Chuck, wait, wait, wait, wait.
你不能这样扔下我 不 No, no. You can't leave me. No.
如果我出不去 这辈子就完了 If I, if I don't get out of this, my life is over!
你明白就好 So long as you understand that.
我明白 Yeah.
吉米 如果我要帮你 Jimmy, if I do this--
我是说如果 别给我捅娄子 if, do not make a fool out of me.
我不会的 I promise I won't.
不管你在做什么 Everything you're doing,
不管你牵扯上了什么 都结束了 everything you're involved with, that's over.
告诉我怎么做 Just tell me what to do.
我一定会照做的 Whatever it is, I'll do it.
说吧 Just say it.
求你了 查克 Please, Chuck?
帮帮我 Help me.
绝命律师 第一季 第三集
詹姆斯·M·麦吉尔
喂 Hello?
是我 It's me.
吉米 这都几点了 Jimmy? What's --Jesus, what time is it?
两点 The clock says 2:00,
但好像是胡志明[越南]时间 But I think that might be Ho Chi Minh's time zone.
什么 怎么了 查克还好吗 What? What's happening? Is Chuck all right?
查克还是老样子 Yeah. Chuck -- Chuck is Chuck, all right?
一切都好 E-everything's all right.
我只是想给你打个电话 I just wanted to call you.
你还好吗 So, what you doing?
吉米 不行 我不会跟你聊下流话的 Jimmy...No. I'm not talking dirty to you.
什么 What?
等等 都这么晚了 Wait, you think that's
你觉得我是来找你打色情电话的吗 the only reason I would call you at this time of night?
你就不能给我... I mean, can you just give me --
对我有点信心 好吗 give me a little bit of credit, okay?
你也不许跟我讲下流话 And you're not talking dirty to me, either.
-那还是挂了吧 -我就知道 - Okay, bye. - I knew it.
开玩笑 只是跟你开个玩笑 Joking. Just -- just joking, having fun with you.
我今晚打给你 I am calling you tonight
不聊下流的话题 with quality PG phone conversation --
最差十三岁以下禁止听 PG-13 at worst.
我发誓 Hand to god, you know?
但是 如果你现在挂断 But, if you hang up now
直接开车过来 and drive straight over,
时间有限 limited time only,
我提供免费修脚和足浴 I'm offering a free pedicure and foot bath.
是吗 下次吧 Is that right? Well, maybe next time.
我还没说完呢 Hey, more for me.
你可能正忙着工作 You're, probably swamped with work anyways,
某个错综复杂看不懂的案子 what, with that big, fat, giant case
正放在你腿上 falling right into your lap.
-什么案子 -不太清楚 - Which case is that? - I don't know.
某个县级官员什么的 Some, some county official or something?
上报纸的那个 It was in all the papers.
克雷格·凯特尔曼 Craig Kettleman.
就是他 Craig Kettleman, yeah!
你那蠢老板从我手里 The primo client your dipwad boss
偷走的重要委托人 stole right out from under me.
没人偷你的委托人 凯特尔曼自己决定的 Nobody stole anybody. The Kettleman's made a choice.
美国西部移民史上最为惨痛的悲剧
唐纳大队抄近路也是他们自己选的 Yeah, so did the Donner Party when they took that shortcut.
别这样 吉米 哈姆林没那么坏 Come on, Jimmy. Hamlin is not that bad.
如果开庭受审 我会是助理律师 And I'm gonna be second chair if it ever goes to trial, so...
替我高兴吧 be happy for me.
凯特尔曼到底贪了多少钱 Hey, how much exactly did Kettleman get away with?
未经证明有罪即无辜 Excuse me, innocent until proven guilty?
我毕竟也是这县里的纳税人啊 Excuse me, but I'm a taxpayer in this county.
我有权知道 I think I have a right to know.
况且 我又不是他的律师 And besides, it's not like I'm his lawyer or anything.
我要睡觉了 你也该睡了 I have to go to sleep. So do you.
我知道你早上还要出庭 I know you have court in the morning.
他至少贪了一百万 一百六十万 He got away with $1 million, $1.6 million, at least?
我不会透露案件细节给你的 晚安 I'm not talking details of the case with you. Goodnight.
这么多钱要藏在哪 Where do you stash all that dough?
除了买那艘破船 I mean, besides for buying that idiotic boat.
这就是罪证 Hello, guilty.
赶紧挂了吧 Hanging up now.
这个人很可能会成为目标 This guy's -- yeah, he's probably a target.
有人可能会打坏主意 Somebody might get some bad, bad ideas.
如果凯特尔曼没处理好这些钱 You know, if Kettleman isn't careful with that money,
他全家都会有危险 I mean his whole family could be in danger.
什么"危险" What do you mean, "Danger"?
吉米 你为什么这么说 Jimmy, why would you say that?
什么 What?
你说他全家都会有危险 You said the family might be in danger.
是吗 我... I did? I... I...
我喝多了 I'm -- I'm drunk.
只是自言自语罢了 So, I'm just, I'm thinking out loud.
只是这念头挥之不去 I'm -- I'm up, spinning,-- spinning thoughts.
-真的吗 -是啊 - You sure? - Yeah.
当然 Yeah, yeah, yeah.
明天法院见 So, I will see you down in the court bowels mañana.
晚安 金 Goodnight, Kim.
晚安 吉米 Goodnight, Jimmy.
我不是英雄 I'm no hero.
你好 这里是凯特尔曼家 Hello! You've reached team Kettleman!
请留言给克雷格... Please leave a message for Craig...
贝茜 沃伦 Betsy... Warren...
还有乔乔 And Jo Jo...
嘀声之后请留言 After the beep!
你好 这里是凯特尔曼家 Hello! You've reached team Kettleman!
请留言... Please leave a mess--
喂 Hello?
凯特尔曼一家 你们有危险 Kettlemans, you're in danger.
你们有危险 You're in danger.
-抱歉 你说什么 -克雷格 是谁 - I'm s-- I'm sorry. What? - Craig, who is it?
不清楚 等等 I am not sure. Wait.
麻烦再说一遍 Say -- say that again, please.
他们知道钱的事了 They know about your money.
小心 Watch out.
你想说什么 Yeah, what are you trying to say?
警告你们 你们有危险 This is a warning. You're in danger.
你们来找你要钱了 They're coming for your money.
我是个善意的陌生人 你们全家有危险 This is a friendly stranger. Your whole family's in danger.
钱 他们知道钱的事了 The money -- they know about the money!
你信号很差 You have a terrible connection.
警告你们 I'm warning you.
他们知道钱的事了 注意 They know about your money. Be careful.
-你觉得 -你能换条信号好的线路吗 - Do you think... - Can you call back on a better line?
凯特尔曼一家 你们有危险 Kettlemans, you're in danger.
他们来找你要钱了 再见 They're coming for your money. Bye.
他说什么 我们... What did he say? We're...
有危险 他们来了 In danger. They're coming.
谁... Who...
谁来了 Who's coming?
这样如何 减去已服刑期加心理辅导 Okay, how about this -- time served plus counseling?
-不行 -这是他初犯 - Can't do it. - It's his first offense.
不行 麦吉尔 Can't do it, McGill.
就会说"不行" "不行" "Can't do it." "Can't do it."
我的话你就听不进去吗 Would you work with me here?
我在听 不是吗 I'm listening, aren't I?
你根本没听进去 Well, you're kind of a captive audience.
你中午吃了什么 整只烤怪兽吗 What did you eat for lunch -- the whole roast beast?
真有趣 Funny.
行 好吧 Okay. Okay.
好好听我说 But hear me out.
他已经蹲了三十天 就有六十天的信用期 The 30 he's done, which is a 60 credit,
再加六十天 plus 60 additional days.
不行 Can't do it.
最低报价 算上他已经蹲的一共六个月 Best offer -- six months, plus the time he's done,
良好表现减刑一半 九十天 half time for good behavior -- out in 90.
-不能再多了 -不可能 - That's my final. - That's never gonna happen.
算了吧 你开玩笑吗 Come on. Now, are you joking?
这是最佳的提议了 Now, that is the best deal you're gonna get.
不行 I can't do it.
你的委托人酒驾闯入购物中心 Your guy drove drunk into a shopping center
杀了三个人 and killed three people.
什么购物中心 我说的是德斯蒙德·罗哈斯 Wait. Shopping center? Desmond Rojas.
持枪抢劫贩酒店 Armed robbery, liquor store.
他用一瓶咖啡酒攻击了收银员 He assaulted a cashier with a bottle of kahlua.
我刚在想达里尔·雷德伍德 I was thinking of Daryl Redwood.
行 我的错 德斯蒙德·罗哈斯 你说 Yeah, okay. My bad. Desmond rojas. Okay, go.
再说一遍 Start over.
我才不再说一遍 I am not starting over.
我每天绞尽脑汁 一个案子只拿七百块 I'm busting my nut here every day for 700 a throw,
还要闻你的屎臭 inhaling your B.M.,
简直是直接从恶魔屁眼里拉出来的 which is straight from satan's bunghole,
结果你竟分不清两个被告 and you can't tell one defendant from another?!
表现良好服刑九十天 就这样了 90 days with good behavior -- we're doing this.
行 好的 Yeah. Okay, yeah.
说 说清楚 "我接受此提议" Say it. Say the words, "I accept the deal."
行 我...我接受此提议 Yeah, I-I accept -- I accept the deal.
早上好 Good morning.
问我什么意思是什么意思 W-what do you mean, what did I mean?
我...没 说过我当时醉了 我只是 I-I -- no, I told you. I-I was drunk. I just --
金 你为什么...问我这个 Kim, why are you -- why are you asking me this?
靠 Oh, damn it.
给 我真有急事 Here. I'm in a real rush.
没时间去认证 I didn't have time to get the validation.
行 九美元 Fine. 9 bucks.
我钱不够 I-I don't have it.
我只有五美元 行吗 I have $5. Please?
你懂规矩 要么给钱要么认证 You know the drill -- money or the validation.
真是急事 好吗 Look, this is an emergency, okay?
非常严重危急的事 A serious, serious emergency.
我得出去 I have to get out of here.
我以我祖宗的灵魂发誓 I promise, on the souls of my forefathers,
我回来就去弄贴纸 I will get you the stickers when I come back.
只要你让我出去 我就多给你一张 I will get you extra if you just let me go.
行 Fine!
行 你要让我走回去弄贴纸吗 Fine! You're gonna make me walk back and get the stickers?!
我会走回去弄贴纸的 I will walk back and get the stickers!
不是我逼你 这都是规定 I'm not making you do anything. Those are the rules.
只要你晚上睡得安稳 Hey, whatever helps you sleep at night.
去你的 死老头 Screw you, geezer!
调度中心 收到 Copy that, dispatch.
吉米 什么风把你吹来了 Jimmy. What brought you here?
我... Me? Uh...
我在听警用广播 Uh, I-I was surfing the police scanner.
我听说这边出了什么乱子 I heard there was big activity out this way.
这边没你的事 下次再来吧 Well, there's no business for you here, so maybe next time.
是一起入室案吗 凯特尔曼他们家没事吧 Uh, it was a home invasion? Uh, the Kettlemans okay?
我们不知道 Uh, we don't know.
昨天晚上邻居遛狗经过时 A neighbor was walking the dog last night
发现前门大开着 and saw the front door wide open.
屋子里被洗劫一空 一家人都不知所踪 The place was ransacked. No sign of the family.
也没有留言 所以我们还在调查 There's no note, so... We're still figuring it out.
我得回去了 I got to get back.
当然了 祝你好运 Yeah, yeah. Of course. Good luck.
你为什么要过来 Why did you come here?
我只是在我朋友需要时来支持她 I'm just supporting a friend in her time of need.
你想表示支持吗 You want to be supportive?
那就告诉我你昨晚为什么要那么说 Tell me why you said those things last night.
那些都只是推测 I'm just reading tea leaves,
正如我为什么会知道凯特尔曼他们需要个律师 same way I knew the Kettlemans needed a lawyer.
他们贪污的钱... All that money floating out there --
稍加揣测就知道肯定有人会来抢 It's logical somebody would come after it.
昨晚你为他们担心 今天他们就失踪了 So, the same night you worry about them, they...disappear?
系列电影 用于形容聪明的骗子
太荒唐了 就像《雷普利》一样 Yeah, it's crazy. It's "Ripley's."
吉米 不单单是克雷格和贝茜·凯特尔曼 Jimmy, it's not just Craig and Betsy Kettleman --
还有他们的两个孩子 It's their two kids, as well.
如果你能帮忙找到他们 一定会告诉我们吧 You would...say something if you could help find them, right?
我不...我不知道发生了什么 I don't -- I don't know what happened to them.
真的 我不知道 Really, I d-- I don't know.
你逗留得越久 The longer you stay here,
我要跟哈姆林解释得就越多 the more explaining I have to do to Hamlin.
我迟点再跟你说 I'll talk to you later.
如果我能帮上忙 就告诉我 Hey, you'll tell me if there's anything I can do?
会没事的 Everything is gonna be fine.
会解决的 It's gonna work out.
没事 会没事的 A-okay. It's gonna be fine.
我是纳乔 请留言 Nacho. Leave it.
是的 我... Uh, yes, I'm, uh...
我是之前跟你谈过的那一方 This is the party you spoke to the other day.
我很想帮你摆脱 Uh, and I sincerely want to help you
你现在的困境 de-escalate your situation,
利用合法的或其他手段 uh, legally and otherwise.
请你尽早 Um, so call me at
给我回电 146-8729
号码是146-8729 at your earliest convenience.
但请你快一点 But soon, please.
我是纳乔 请留言 Nacho. Leave it.
纳乔 你好 Yeah, Nacho, hi.
声明一点 我什么都不知道 Uh...Just to clarify, look, I don't know anything.
我跟谁都没说过 Uh, I have spoken to no one,
也没人监听这个电话 and, uh, there are no rats on this ship.
但是鉴于有多人卷入此事 But for the sake of everyone involved,
我只是想和你说清楚 I would just like to open a dialogue.
所以 146-8729 So...146-8729.
请尽快打给我 call me when you get this.
如果我之前没说清楚 If I didn't say it before,
现在我们分秒必争 time is of the essence on this matter,
我还是先挂了 以免你正好打过来 so, uh, I'm gonna hang up now -- if you're trying to call.
如果你听到忙音 这边没有呼叫等待 Uh, there's no call waiting here if you get a busy signal.
146-8729 146-8729.
继续打 我在边上 Just keep trying. I'll be here.
我能解决这个麻烦 如果真有麻烦的话 I can put out this fire, if there is a fire.
我希望这一切都只是一个误会 By hope of hopes, this is all a big misunderstanding.
146-8729 146-8729.
喂 Hello?
喂 纳乔 Hello? Nacho?
纳乔 Nacho?
走 继续走 Walking. Just walking.
一个人散步而已 Just strolling along.
-感谢上帝 救命 -趴下 举起手来 - Oh, thank God! Help! Help! - Down! Show us your hands!
-不许动 趴下 -你们是警察 - Stop! On the ground! - Oh, you guys are cops?
-举起手来 -我膝盖不好 - Show us your hands! - I got bad knees! Ow! Ohh!
别这样 警官 come on, officers.
你们弄错了 我叫詹姆斯·麦吉尔 You're making a mistake. My name's McGill, James McGill.
我是个律师 I'm an attorney.
轻点 轻点 Easy, easy!
是他的律师 It's his lawyer.
谁的律师 Whose lawyer?
你确定他找的是我吗 You sure he asked for me?
到底进不进去 Going in or what?
你要求找我 我来了 You asked for me, and I have come.
我想告诉你这一步走得很正确 I want to tell you this was a wise move --
很聪明 因为我来这儿是帮助 每个人 very smart, because I'm here to help...everyone --
所有人 特别是你 all parties, but mostly you.
那两个警探 Uh, those two detectives --
他们刚给我说了很多 they just gave me an earful.
他们告诉我的就是 And what they were telling me is --
情况很棘手 it's problematic.
我会再给你复述一遍 I'm gonna pitch it back to you
这样我们才能达成共识 so I know we're on the same page.
女邻居连续两天晚上 A neighbor lady saw a suspicious van
看到可疑车辆停放在 parked across the street from the
凯特尔曼家对面的马路上 Kettlemans' house two nights in a row.
她记下了车牌号 She wrote down the license plate.
也就是你的车牌号 It was your license plate.
警察追查到了你的车和你 Cops tracked your van and you,
搜了车 并在地板上发现了血迹 searched it, and found blood on the floor.
就这么多 So...here we are.
他们在请联调局介入 They're calling the FBI in on this,
这就会变成联邦案件 which makes it federal.
这很糟糕 纳乔 That's a bad thing, Nacho.
这非常糟 That's -- that's very bad,
但是如果你告诉我那家人在哪儿 but if you tell me where the family is,
如果你现在就说出来 if -- if you give them up now --
通力合作 并深深懊悔所做一切 full cooperation, deep remorse --
要把你的刑期 I feel very good
谈到最低限度 我很有信心 about knocking your sentence down to the minimum --
也就十八年 18 years.
他们很看中表现良好这件事 They take this good-behavior thing very seriously,
所以从现在开始 so start here, right here.
告诉我那家人没事儿 Tell me the family is okay.
告诉我孩子们没事儿 Tell me the kids are okay.
你想跟我讨论一下你的想法吗 Y-you want to tell me your thoughts and weigh in?
这是你能够接受的计划吗 Does this sound like a plan that you can get behind?
你这个可怜虫 You miserable piece of shit.
-你陷害了我 -我怎么了 - You set me up. - I what?
你把我的计划告诉了另一伙人 You gave my score to another crew,
现在你在陷害我 and now you're setting me up.
我 什么跟什么啊 警察打你了吗 I -- what the what? D-did the cops beat you?
因为你现在说的话就像是头撞坏了 'Cause you're talking like a person with head trauma.
你觉得自己很有趣吗 You think you're funny?
你在说什么 What are you saying?
你是说你跟这事完全没关系吗 Are you saying that you had nothing to do with this?
房子外面停的确实是你的货车 That was your van outside the house.
-你不在那儿吗 -是 我在 - Y-you weren't there? - Yeah, I was there.
我是去踩点 I was casing the place,
观察最好的进出路线 figuring out the best way in and out,
他们什么时间睡觉之类的 what time they went to bed -- all that.
我离开的时候他们都好好的 就这样 They were fine when I left. That's it.
你跟凯特尔曼一家没任何关系吗 You had nothing to do with the Kettlemans?
我从未进过屋子 I was never in the house.
货车里的血迹怎么解释 What about the blood in your van?
如果他们要查车上的DNA They DNA my ride,
他们只会发现那对滑板小毛头的血迹 all they're gonna find is the blood of your skate-rat twins,
还有你在那儿的时候 plus whatever piss and shit
留下的那些狗屁痕迹 you leaked out when you were in there.
自那之后没人再进过那里 Nobody's been in the back of that van since.
我 我不明白 I...I don't understand.
我是这么理解的 律师 Here's what I understand, counselor.
我只把我的计划告诉了另外一个人 I told my plan to one other person.
就是你 One -- you.
现在我被捕了 Now here I am, under arrest.
自己想去吧 Go figure.
我不知道什么陷害或是另一伙人 I don't know anything about a setup or another crew.
知道吗 我一点儿不在乎 You know what? I don't even care.
警察已经去调查我的生意了 The cops are out there right now, poking into my business,
如果他们真的查到我或我伙计什么 and if they find something on me or my partners, for real,
对你来说将会很糟糕 很糟糕 it's gonna be bad for you -- really bad.
糟糕 在哪方面糟糕 Bad? Bad as in...
今天你把我弄出去 You get me out of here today...
否则你死定了 Or you're a dead man.
我问你是不是知道什么 I asked if you knew anything.
你没跟我说你在代理头号嫌疑犯啊 You didn't tell me you were representing the lead suspect.
那个时候我还不知道 I didn't know it at the time.
他交待什么了吗 He give up anything?
-什么 -他说没说那家人在哪里 - What? - Did he tell you where the family is?
他 他不知道 H-he doesn't know.
他不知道是什么意思 W-what does that mean -- he doesn't know?
他把他们交给其他人了吗 He gave them to somebody else?
他不知道是因为不是他做的 He -- he doesn't know because he didn't do it.
天哪 少蒙我 Ah, christ. Give me a break.
两位 能让我俩单独谈谈吗 Guys, can you give us just a minute?
吉米 那家人现在真的很危险 Jimmy, that family is in real danger.
你不能因为是他的律师就包庇他 You don't have to stand behind attorney-client privilege.
我没有 I'm not.
那家人现在可能正被囚禁在小屋里 These people can be buried in a box,
连呼吸都成困难 sucking air through a straw right now.
如果真是这样 我感到很抱歉 And I'm sorry if that's where they are,
但真不是我的委托人做的 but my guy didn't do it.
你为什么这么肯定 How are you so sure?
知道你们接下来应该干什么吗 You know what you're gonna do?
你们应该找专门的鉴证人员 You're gonna get your special CSI people, right?
检测货车里留下的血迹 And you're gonna test the blood from that van,
因为我可以打包票 because I guarantee you, one billion percent,
那绝对不是凯特尔曼一家的血 it's not the Kettlemans'.
那是谁的 Whose is it?
反正不是他们的 尽管去测试就是了 I-it's not the Kettlemans'. Just test it.
那得花几星期时间 That'll take weeks,
这还是在我们可以搞到DNA样本对比的情况下 if we could even get a DNA sample to compare it to.
那还不是小意思嘛 Well, isn't that convenient?
你们已经关押了个无辜的人 You've got an innocent man in there right now,
我要求你们释放他并向他道歉 who I demand you release with an apology!
没有其他嫌疑犯 Look, there are no other suspects.
没有任何证据指向其他人 There's no evidence that points to anyone else.
既然这样 我想去看看案发现场 Well, then, I want to see the crime scene,
因为你们肯定漏掉了什么 'cause you guys are missing something.
去你的吧 漏掉个毛线 Screw you, "Missing something."
不 警探们 我觉得这是个好主意 No, detectives, I, um... I think that's a good idea.
-好主意 -是的 - A good idea? - Yes.
我觉得我们应该请麦吉尔先生到那里看看 I think we should invite mr. McGill to the house.
为什么 why?
是啊 为什么 Yeah, why?
我们漏掉了什么 So, what did we miss?
这是他们十二岁的儿子沃伦的房间 This is the son's room -- Warren. 12 years old.
这是乔乔的房间 Jo Jo's room.
她七岁 She's 7.
好吧 你们不就是想看我笑话吗 All right, you wanted me to crack?
你们成功了 Mission accomplished.
但我告诉你们 不是我的委托人做的 But I'm telling you -- my client didn't do this.
我们知道瓦尔加那晚在房子外面 We know Varga was outside the house
而那晚这家人就失踪了 这是事实 the night the family disappeared. That is a fact.
不管你想怎么为他辩解 Advocate for the guy all you want
都得让我们先把这家人平安救出来 after we get these people back safe.
在此期间 你得帮帮我们 In the meantime, help us.
洋娃娃哪儿去了 Where's the doll?
什么东西哪儿去了 Where's the what?
小鞋子 小衣服 Uh, got little shoes, a bunch of clothes,
桌椅 梳子都在 a table and chairs, hairbrush,
但主角洋娃娃去哪儿了 but where's the doll that goes with all this stuff?
这个小女孩的每张照片里 In every picture of this little girl,
都抱着一个同样的洋娃娃 she's holding the same doll.
所以 洋娃娃去哪儿了 So, where's the doll?
这有什么打紧吗 What does it matter?
洋娃娃不见了 小女孩也不见了 Doll is gone -- girl is gone,
这就表示洋娃娃和小女孩很可能在一起 which means doll and girl are most likely together,
也就是说 which means...
我不知道这代表什么 I have no idea what that means.
这代表那个孩子不是被拖出家门的 Which means the kid wasn't dragged out of the house.
-事实表明[拉丁语]... -慢着 - Ipso facto... - Wait. Wait.
你在说什么 What are you saying?
可能凯特尔曼一家人绑架了自己 Maybe the Kettlemans kidnapped themselves.
够了 你不用说了 我们走吧 That's it. You're -- you're -- you're done. Let's go.
-这完全讲得通 -怎么说 - I-it makes perfect sense. - How does it make sense?
他们为什么那么做 Why would they do that?
他们盗取了一百多万美元 对吧 They stole a million dollars-plus, right?
如果你想带着那么多诱人的现金远走高飞 You -- you want to get away with all that yummy cash,
你会怎么做 逃走吗 不 当然不能 what do you do -- run? No, you can't.
如果你逃走 大家就都知道你犯了罪 If you run, everyone knows you're guilty. Ah!
但如果你被绑架了那你就是受害者 对吗 But if you're kidnapped, you're a victim, right?
他们导演了这场绑架 迷惑别人 They staged this to throw everyone off.
你们陷入了误区 You guys are looking in the wrong place.
他们现在可能正躲在 Who knows how many miles into
墨西哥或加拿大的哪个角落呢 Mexico or Canada they could be?
你们得放出消息查一查 You -- you got to put the word out.
别这样 Oh, co-come on.
你们不觉得我说的可能是对的吗 You don't think it's possible I'm right?
可能...不太可能 It's possible -- unlikely.
-不太可能 -他们所有车都在这儿 - Unlikely? - All their cars are here.
没有任何出租车或汽车服务的记录 There's no record of a taxi or car service to the house,
他们也没有乘坐飞机 汽车或火车 And they didn't get on any planes or buses or trains.
-这些你们都查过了吗 -是的 - You checked all that? - Yes, we checked it.
还有那洋娃娃 我们早注意到它不见了 And the doll -- it's not news. We saw it was missing.
那它在哪呢 So where is it?
那小女孩可能是吓哭了 The girl was scared, crying.
为了让她安静点 坏人就让她带了洋娃娃 Bad guy lets the kid take the doll to shut her up.
怎么了 What?
你觉得那不可能吗 You don't think that's possible?
我要和你单独谈谈 I need to talk to you alone.
我得偷偷告诉你点事 I've got to tell you something on the q.t.,
你得先保证 不许发火 and promise not to be upset with me.
我可不能保证 No way am I making that promise.
我给凯特尔曼他们家打了电话 I called the Kettlemans.
昨晚给你打完后 我就去打电话警告他们了 After I hung up with you, I gave them a warning call.
打电话警告他们 A warning call?
是的 我担心瓦尔加想拿他们的钱 Yeah, I was worried my guy Varga was going after their money.
他果然去了 他就计划去抢钱的 And he was. He was gonna rip them off.
我从我们之前的谈话中推断出来的 I deduced it from a conversation that we had.
我和他是律师和委托人的关系 It was lawyer to client,
所以我得对他的事情保密 So there was, you know, confidentiality issues.
但我给凯特尔曼家打匿名电话警告他们 But I called the Kettlemans anonymously to warn them.
匿名的 Anonymously?
你不会是...老天 你难道 You didn't -- oh, god, you didn't --
你是模仿性爱机器人的声音吗 You didn't do the sex-robot voice, did you?
是的 就用一个管子堵住嘴巴 I did, with the tube and the whole thing,
那声音很可能把他们吓了个半死 which probably scared the living shit out of them,
于是 你看 他们就跑了 And they took off, which, you know,
造成了这种"意外后果" file that under "Unintended consequences,"
你现在信我了吗 But you -- you believe me now?
太好了 Uh... Great.
我们现在只要找到他们就好 Now we have to find them.
不过 最好先让警察把瓦尔加放出来 I mean -- or, better yet, get the cops to let Varga go
我现在可是如履薄冰 危在旦夕 because right now my ass is on a highway to the danger zone.
你怎么这么说 Well, why are you in danger?
纳乔·瓦尔加并没有绑架这家人 Nacho Varga -- he didn't kidnap the family.
但他的确是个坏蛋 非常坏 But he's a bad guy. He's a very bad guy.
如果警察继续纠缠他 And if the cops keep pushing him,
他们就要发现一些不好的事 they're gonna find something.
然后 纳乔就要怪到我头上 And when that happens, Nacho blames me,
再然后 这些人就要把我当人肉皮纳塔打 And then his guys turn me into a meat Piñata.
皮纳塔 内装满玩具与糖果 让人用棍棒打击
吉米 去和警察说啊 Jimmy, tell the police.
不行 我死也不能卖了他们 No, there's n-- there's no way I'm gonna rat on this guy.
否则我永世不得安宁 I will never be safe.
不行 我得先去说服那些警察 No, I have to convince the cops that I'm right,
让他们别再缠着纳乔 get them to stop looking at Nacho,
然后去抓在逃的凯特尔曼一家 and catch the Kettlemans on the run.
要是警察没抓到他们呢 And if they never catch them?
你说凯特尔曼一家 The Kettlemans?
你也见过他们对吧 Well, you've met these people, right?
这家人压根就没多聪明 They're -- they're not exactly masterminds, right?
只要警察去抓他们 肯定能抓到 They will be caught if the cops are looking for them,
你快去让警察抓他们 好不好 So you tell them to, would you?
让联调局也去 听说他们也介入此事了 The FBI, too -- I heard they're getting in on this.
人家联调局凭什么听我的 Why would the FBI listen to me?
那就让哈姆林去说 他们一定听他的 Well, Hamlin -- they'll listen to him, right?
至少警局会听话吧 你去和霍华德说说 APD, at least. Y-you -- you talk to Howard.
向他解释清楚 You explain things to him.
他还是有影响力的 He has clout with these people.
这是什么意思 不行吗 What? Is -- is that a no or...
哈姆林一定不会干 Hamlin will never agree to it.
凯特尔曼夫妇是我们的委托人 The Kettlemans are our clients.
这样无异于说他们有罪 This would mean incriminating them.
你看 所以人们才痛恨律师 Oh, you -- you see? This is why people hate lawyers.
这事哈姆林说了算 而他一定不会同意的 It's Hamlin's call, and Hamlin will never agree.
即便是我说了算 你也知道我不会同意 And even if it were up to me, you know I couldn't.
对不起 我真的 I'm sorry. I just --
我知道了 I get it.
你要去哪 Where are you going?
我要去和纳乔谈谈 I'm gonna go talk to Nacho.
去给他说说理 I'll try to make him see reason.
去求他 To beg!
限高4.5米
快点 Come on.
取票口
快出啊 Come on!
好吧 那个... Right. Yeah. Hey.
那天我是傻逼 行了吧 I was a jerk, okay?
我欠你多少钱 这次都给你 So, I will -- I will pay you what I owe you,
你让我过去 我连本带利都还你 Plus interest, if you just let me come through.
你到别处停车去吧 I suggest you find parking somewhere else.
别处 哪还有别处 Somewhere else, as in -- where somewhere else?
那我管不着 Not my concern.
事实上 这是你的工作 Uh, actually, uh, this is your job,
所以你应该管 So, by definition, it's your concern.
所以赶紧把票给我 把门打开 谢谢 So pump out the ticket and open the stupid gate already, please.
我没时间跟你耗 I mean, I don't have time for this.
好... All...
好吧 All right!
我就把车停这儿了 Hey. I'm gonna -- I'm gonna park right here.
你胆子大了是吗 I don't think you want to be doing that.
是吗 Oh, yeah?
你能怎么办 里面有装满屎的尿布吗 What are you gonna do? You got a poop-filled diaper in there?
拿出来扔我头上啊 Are you gonna throw it at me?
老掉牙的瘪瘪嘴咬死我啊 死老头子 You gonna gum me to death, huh, geezer?
这可是一家子啊 妈妈爸爸还有俩孩子 We're talking about a family -- Mom, Dad, two kids.
律师的什么狗屁理论 Lawyer's got this bullshit theory
说他们绑架自己 带钱跑路 about them staging this and running off with the money.
你听说了吗 You know the story?
听说了 县财务主管挪用钱款 Yeah, county treasurer embezzled funds.
我看报纸了 I read the paper.
我们抓了一个混混 铁定是他 Yeah, well, we got this gangbanger dead to rights.
唯一的问题就是你那朋友 Only problem is your guy over there.
他得帮我们套出他那委托人的话 He needs to help us get his scumbag client to talk.
你怎么说 同意吗 So, what do you say? You on board?
做点好事帮帮我们 Help us do some good.
当然 Sure.
好 事情是这样的 你攻击了这个人 Okay, here's the deal -- you assaulted this man.
得了吧 我连他毛都没碰到 Give me a break. I barely touched the guy.
但是你先动的手 But you laid hands on him first.
手指 我只对他动了手指 Finger -- I laid finger on him.
你再解释 也是你先攻击的 Well, whatever your interpretation, it was still an assault.
现在这位先生愿意放你一马 Now, this gentleman is willing to let this go,
只要你帮我们 就不会起诉你 not press charges, if you help us out.
你得让你的委托人 You got to get your client
告诉我们这家人被藏在哪了 to tell us where he has the family stashed.
等等 哥们 我都快成复读机了 Wait, guys, I'm the definition of a broken record on this one.
纳乔就是"呐瞧 你们抓错了人了" 懂吗 Nacho is "Not-cho" Man, comprendo?
没人带走凯特尔曼一家 Nobody took the Kettlemans.
是凯特尔曼一家自己逃走的 The Kettlemans took themselves!
你要还这么说 事情就严重了 You're gonna keep playing that line, it's gonna go rough.
有什么损招 你就使吧 You know what? Do your worst.
好 跟我走 登记去 All right, let's go -- to booking.
行 走 Yeah, sure.
好的 Fine.
美好的一天 善始善终 Perfect end to a perfect day.
等下伙计们 我改主意了 Hey, guys, wait a second. I changed my mind.
-你说什么 -我不告他了 - I'm sorry. What? - I don't want to press charges.
我们不是谈好了 你想起诉他的 We talked about this. You want to press charges.
不想 我不想 No. No, I don't.
你这是干嘛 老兄弟 我们不是一伙的吗 What are you doing, buddy? I thought you had our backs.
我可不记得我说过 老兄弟 No, I don't think I said that, buddy.
怎么着 现在有机会做好事儿 So, what -- you get a chance to do the right thing
你却像个娘们放弃了 and you puss out?
是的 失之我命啊 Yeah. Well, I guess it's my loss.
卡格尼 莱西 Hey, Cagney, Lacey.
等你们意识到自己现在的错误 When you realize how wrong you are about all this,
送我给果篮 我就当你们道歉了 I'll take an edible arrangement as a "Sorry."
多放点菠萝 Heavy on the pineapple.
等等 Hey. Hold up.
你刚刚为什么就放过我了 How come you let me off the hook back there?
听着 我要回去工作了 Look, I'm going back to work.
你哪儿凉快哪儿呆着去 不用问 Why don't you quit while you're ahead and go on your way?
不行 我不相信 No, I refuse to believe it's because
感觉你体内还是有颗心 you have something resembling a heart inside your body.
再缠着我 五秒以后 You're not gonna have a heart inside your body
你体内那颗心就没了 in about five seconds.
好 不用你说 Okay, don't tell me, all right?
我已经知道你为什么这么做了 I already know why you did it.
是吗 为什么 Yeah? Why is that?
因为你相信我 'Cause you believe me.
那家人自己绑架了自己 That family kidnapped themselves.
好吧 我相信你 All right, I believe you.
我就知道 我就知道 I knew it! I knew it!
终于有人相信我了 Finally, someone believes me!
为什么你会相信我 Why do you believe me?
我听到了细节 你的故事合乎常理 I heard the details. Your story makes sense.
当然了 但... Of course it does! But...
但话又说回来 就像警察说的 Devil's advocate -- like the cops said,
凯特尔曼家的车还在家里 the Kettlemans' cars are still at their house.
也没有离开的记录 There's no record of them leaving.
他们怎么出的国 H-how'd they get out of the country?
没出国 They didn't.
很可能他们连那社区都没出 Odds are, they didn't get out of their neighborhood.
什么 你再说一遍 What? What? They -- come again?
听着 我在费城当班那会儿 Look when I was still on the job back in Philly,
当时有个案子 We had this case --
等等 别急 Whoa, hold up. Hold up.
这个"当班"是指你以前当过警察吗 Now, wait. "On the job," as in you were a cop on the job?
有个庄家在超级碗赛后失踪了 This bookie disappeared after the Super Bowl --
达拉斯牛仔对匹兹堡钢人 Cowboys/Steelers--
由于运气不佳 took $6 million in bets
卷了六百万跑路了 and skipped town when things didn't go his way.
大家都以为他逃到巴哈马享受阳光沙滩 Now, everybody thought he was on the beach in the Bahamas
或是横尸在新泽西的松林滩涂 or dead in the Jersey pine barrens --
结果根本不是那回事 wasn't the case.
他就住在离家不远的一间抵押房里 He was two doors down from where he lived in a foreclosed house.
躲了整整六个月 谁也没怀疑 Hid there for six months without anyone suspecting.
但为什么不一走了之 But -- but why? Why not run?
携款潜逃是定性思维 Now, that's what everybody expects.
但回家是人的本能 It's human nature to want to stay close to home,
所以既要销声匿迹又要掩人耳目 And if this Kettleman figured out how to do it,
凯尔特曼肯定潜藏在家附近 That's what he did.
家是人的根 Nobody wants to leave home.
我知道 我超期待的 I know. It's pretty exciting.
我们好好玩一把 好吗 Let's really sell this one. Okay?
准备 开始... Let's do this. And...
*从前有个农夫 养了一只狗* *There was a farmer had a dog*
*他的名字叫宾果* *And Bingo was his name-o*
*B-I-N-G-O* *B-I-N-G-O*
*他的名字叫宾果* *And Bingo was his name-o*
*从前有个农夫 养了一只狗* *There was a farmer had a dog*
*他的名字叫宾果* *And Bingo was his name-o*
*I-N-G-O* *I-N-G-O*
*他的名字叫宾果* *And Bingo was his name-o*
*从前有个农夫 养了一只狗* *There was a farmer had a dog, and bingo was his name-o*
*N-G-O, N-G-O* *N-G-O, N-G-O*
是我 听听吧 Hey, it's me. Listen to this.
*N-G-O 他的名字叫宾果* *N-G-O, and Bingo was his name-o*
*从前有个农夫 养了一只狗* *There was a farmer had a dog*
听见没 You hear that?
我把你的混球委托人找到了 I found your dumbass clients.
我... 这说来话长 I-I-it's a long story.
我要带他们回家 Look, I'm -- I'm taking them back to their place.
我们到时见 We'll meet you there.
给我几个小时 G-give me a couple hours.
*O-O-O* *O-O-O*
*他的名字叫宾果* *And Bingo was his name-o*
大伙儿唱得真棒 That was great, guys.
是啊 我们在睡前再唱一首吧 Yeah, I think we have time for one more before bed.
非唱不可么 Do we have to?
你不唱我唱 Oh, hey, I don't know about you,
我挺想唱这首 but I would love a little
"约翰·雅各布·金格莱·施密特" "John Jacob Jingleheimer Schmidt."
一首诙谐的英语儿歌
好了 打起精神 Yeah, and -- and you know what?
好好唱最后一首 好吗 凯特尔队 Let's really have fun with this one, okay, Kettle team?
准备 开始... Let's do this! And...
看看谁来啦 Here's Johnny!
晚上好 沃伦 Hey. Hey, Warren.
还有乔乔 抱歉把你们吓了一跳 Hey, Jo Jo. Uh, sorry about that.
我是你们的吉米叔叔 别怕 I'm your uncle Jimmy, all right?
你们爸爸妈妈要带你们 Now, your parents are gonna take you down the mountain,
下山回家 好吗 back to your house. That sound good?
-我们... -看见没 他们超兴奋的 - Uh, we -- - Yeah, see? They're excited.
麦吉尔先生 我们能谈谈吗 M-Mr. McGill, can we talk about this?
不 不行 没得谈 No, we can't, okay? You're done here.
快收拾收拾 别唱了 准备回家 Pack up your stuff, bury your scat, 'cause we're heading back.
-回归文明社会 -总算能回去了 - Civilization awaits. - Finally.
抱歉 我们还是 Uh, look, could -- please, could we just
-先谈谈吧 -你没得选 - talk this through, okay? - It's not an option.
你要么自愿回家 You either do this on your own recognizance
要么就等着警察来抓你们 or the cops come and drag you by your heels.
我们走 I -- let's go.
-凯特尔曼一家 -不 - Kettlemans. - No.
-该出发了 -不 - Time to ship out. - No!
-快走 -不 - Yes, you are! - No!
-别无谓挣扎了 -不 我死都不走 - This is happening! - No, this is not happening!
跟我走 快 各位 Yes, it is! Yes! Kettlemans!
-不走 -走 给我走 - No! - Yes, you are doing this now!
绝不 No!
果不其然 Yeah.