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原创翻译 双语字幕
普通美国人平均一年 The average American consumes
翻译 不靠谱翻赛太公 油腻希
会吃掉25公斤的牛肉 55 pounds of beef per year.
但美国有个地方叫德克萨斯 And then there's Texas,
校对 心里没谱赛太公
在这里 我们只要几个月就能吃掉那个量 where we can knock that off in a couple of months.
甚至还能更快 如果有德州烟熏牛胸肉的话 Maybe faster, if we're talking about smoked brisket...
时间轴 风吹来的那片云
后期 灰灰是菇凉
很奇妙的是 牛的这块牛胸肉 ...curiously, the one cut of beef
是唯一让德州人与犹太人都爱不释手的部位 that Texans and Jews agree upon.
总监 新浪微博@赛太公
这真是太好吃啦 姥姥 This is really good, Meemaw.
还太好吃呢 Really good?
你把全德州最好吃的牛胸肉 You're spitting the best brisket in Texas
喷得整餐桌都是 all over the damn table.
嘴巴有东西不要说话 Close your mouth when you eat.
或者把你的脸朝向别的方向 Or aim your face the other way.
康妮 总有一天你得给我这食谱 Connie, one of these days, you got to give me the recipe.
你说会就会啦 You bet. For sure.
-总有一天 -别这样 - One of these days. - Oh, come on.
你总不能瞒一辈子 You can't hold on to it forever.
你这么想要吗 Mean that much to you?
当年我跟玛丽交往一个月左右时 Mary and I were dating about a month
她带我回家吃晚饭 when she brought me home for dinner.
我吃了一口这牛胸肉 I took one bite of this brisket,
我就知道我爱你的女儿 and I knew I loved your daughter.
我真是谢谢你啊 Gee, thanks.
有点像睡美人 不过爸吻的是牛肉 Kind of like Sleeping Beauty, except Dad kissed meat.
这样吧 I tell you what.
你去拿... You go get a...
纸笔来 piece of paper and a pencil,
我给你写下来 I'll write it down for you.
好 终于到了这一刻 Okay. It's happening...
这是我见他跑得最快的一次 That's the fastest I've seen him run.
这是我第一次见他跑 It's the only time I've seen him run.
给 There you go.
好 Okay.
我可能这周末就做来吃 I might make it this weekend.
你也可以试试吃点蔬菜啊 Or you could try a vegetable.
吃蔬菜 你真幽默 Vegetable? That's funny.
好了 Okay.
这个只传给你 Now, this is for your eyes only.
你不许给别人看或分享 You're not to share it with anybody.
我绝... 我绝不会 I never-- I would never.
继续做梦吧 矮冬瓜
你真是缺德 You're a horrible person.
上面写什么了 What'd it say?
我想知道写什么了 I want to know what it said.
-我也想知道 -吃你们的 - Me, too. - Just eat.
我能看吗 Can I read it?
你还真的挺缺德 You are a horrible person.
可不是嘛 Ain't I?
好了 不要再聊这个牛胸肉了 All right, that's enough about the brisket.
你们期待明天的教会野餐吗 You kids excited for the church picnic tomorrow?
-不太 -不知道 - Not really. - I don't know.
别这样 Oh, come on.
你们都看到传单了 有三"有" You all saw the flier. The three "F"s:
有吃 有玩 友谊 food, fun and fellowship.
我要带一大块我的牛胸肉去 And I'm bringing a big slab of my brisket.
我受够了 That's it.
当一家人15年了 这期间我一直都是 15 years in this family, and all the time I've been nothing
一个表现良好又负责任的女婿 but a good, supportive son-in-law.
我也一直都有好好对待你女儿 I always treated your daughter right,
给了你三个可爱的孙子女 I gave you three beautiful grandchildren.
我唯一要求的回报就是给我个破食谱 Only thing I ever asked in return was that damn recipe.
你说得对 You're right.
再去拿张纸 我给你写下来 Get another piece of paper. I'll write it down.
别再耍我 康妮 Don't mess with me, Connie.
快趁我改变主意前去拿纸吧 Get the paper before I change my mind.
你还要再耍他一次 是吧 You're gonna do it to him again, aren't you?
有点不耍不行啊 I kind of have to.
♪ 世上没人比我强壮 ♪ ♪ Nobody else is stronger than I am ♪
♪ 昨天我移了一座山 ♪ ♪ Yesterday I moved a mountain ♪
♪ 我相信我能当你的英雄 ♪ ♪ I bet I could be your hero ♪
♪ 我是个了不起的小家伙 ♪ ♪ I am a mighty little man ♪
少 年
谢尔顿
乔治 她就是跟你闹着玩 George, she was just fooling with you.
没 不是 她就是损 No, no, she's mean.
心都是黑的 She got a black heart.
她才不是 She does not.
你为什么总站在她那边 Why do you always side with her?
她是我妈啊 Well, she is my mother.
看吧 And there it is.
问题就在这 There's the problem.
你应该跟我同一阵线啊 You should be siding with me.
-为了个牛胸肉吗 -不单是为了牛胸肉 - Over brisket? - It's not just brisket.
是她从认识我第一天起就这么对我 It's the way she's been treating me since day one.
就是把我当个废柴 安慰奖 Like I'm some kind of loser, a booby prize.
-"安慰[胸部]奖" -什么声音 - "Booby prize." - What was that?
小乔治 你少多管闲事 Georgie, you mind your own business.
我做什么了 What did I do?
怎么了 What's going on?
爸妈在吵架 Mom and Dad are fighting.
为了什么事 What about?
牛胸肉 Brisket.
如果他们离婚了 If they get a divorce, who do you think
你会选择跟谁过 you'll pick to live with?
当然是选妈啦 Well, Mom, of course.
我要选妈 你换选一个 I want Mom. Pick again.
我还以为爸爸也会来 I thought Dad was coming.
他不来 他有工作 No, he had work to do.
什么工作 不知道 教练的事情吧 What kind of work? I don't know. Coaching stuff.
他不能野餐完再去吗 Can't he do it after the picnic?
-他没办法啊 米希 -为什么 - No, Missy, he cannot. - Why not?
别问了 Enough.
那为什么小乔治也没来 How come Georgie's not going?
他偷听我跟你爸爸说话被禁足了 He's grounded for eavesdropping on me and your father.
希望他学到教训了 Well, I hope he learned his lesson.
是为了食谱的事吗 Is this about the recipe?
我猜他是因为你总站在姥姥这边在生气 I bet he's mad 'cause you always side with Meemaw.
你怎么会知道这个 And how would you know that?
小乔治跟我说的 Georgie told me.
你跟爸爸要离婚了吗 Are you and Dad getting a divorce?
当然不会 'Course not.
如果你们离婚 我想要跟着你过 Well, if you do, I want to live with you.
谢尔顿 我们不会离婚的 Sheldon, no one's getting a divorce.
不过谢谢你选我 But thank you, honey.
你知道这个问题 You know this all goes away
只要你给他食谱 就会烟消云散了吗 if you just give him your recipe for the brisket.
我知道啊 I know.
然后呢 And?
我猜这问题是哪都不会去了 I guess it's not going away.
我没有偷听 And I wasn't eavesdropping.
没事啦 Don't worry about it.
我只是不懂我为什么被禁足 I just don't see why I got grounded.
你有什么好抱怨的 What are you complaining about?
你本来也不想去教会野餐啊 You didn't want to go to church picnic anyway.
我就喜欢抱怨 我特能哔哔 I like complaining. I'm good at it.
我马上回来 I'll be right back.
你介意我喝一口你的啤酒吗 Mind if I have a sip of your beer?
你介意我把你脑袋塞进堆肥筒里吗 You mind if I dip your head in the compost heap?
你说介意不就好了吗 You could have just said no.
你在干嘛 What are you doing?
没干嘛 滚出去 Nothing! Get out of here.
你在找姥姥的牛胸肉食谱 You're looking for her brisket recipe.
这时候你就变天才啦 All of a sudden you got smart?
我说了让你出去 I said get out of here.
我发誓我不会泄密 I won't tell, I swear.
行吧 快来帮忙找 All right, help me look.
找到了吗 Ooh. Found it?
没有 这是她法式吐司的食谱 No, this is her French toast.
没让你找法式吐司 You're not looking for French toast.
这个姥姥也做得很好吃 She does make it good, though.
你知道她会在生奶油里加香草精吗 Did you know she puts vanilla extract in her whipped cream?
我不知道 I did not.
加1/4茶匙 Quarter teaspoon.
-小乔治 -怎么了 - Georgie? - Yeah?
我们是来找牛胸肉食谱 We're looking for brisket!
暴脾气 Cranky.
我们回来啦 We're home.
别慌 Be cool.
我不慌啊 你才别慌呢 I'm cool. You be cool.
可真不慌啊 Real cool.
他以为我有写下来 He thought I wrote it down.
真是个傻子 What a dope.
苏打水 Seltzer...
生发水 生发水 ...hair tonic. Hair tonic.
需要帮忙哄孩子睡觉吗 Need help putting the kids down?
不用了 谢谢 我自己照顾了他们一天 No, thank you, I've been taking care of them all day.
我能自己收尾 I think I can finish the job.
干嘛啦 别这样 Oh, come on, don't do that.
别怎样 Don't do what?
没事 Never mind.
告诉你 谢尔顿跟米希 Just so you know, Sheldon and Missy won
赢了两人三脚赛跑 因为米希跟他说 the three-legged race because she told him
有蜜蜂在追他们 而你错过了这一幕 a bee was chasing them, and you missed it.
是我的错 我只是想远离你妈妈一会儿 I'm sorry, I-I just needed a break from your mother.
是啊 你也远离了你的家人 Yeah, well, you took a break from your family.
你们俩之间的不愉快是想闹多久 How long is this feud between you two gonna go on?
这得看她啊 That's up to her.
你们真是两头... You are both such...
死固执的... stubborn...
犟驴啊 donkey butts!
米希 Missy!
去睡觉 Go to bed.
你怎么知道是不是我 You don't know it's me.
你想干嘛 What do you want?
别这样 Don't be that way.
我给你拿了瓶冰的 I brought you a cold one.
谢谢 Thanks.
还是不喜欢你 I still don't like you.
那这个能让你改变想法吗 Would this change your feelings?
就是这个吗 Is that it?
传说中的一个大秘宝 The Holy Grail.
是什么让你改变了心意 What changed your mind?
你今天不去野餐 You not going to the picnic today,
伤了玛丽与双胞胎的心 that hurt Mary and the twins.
我不想要内心有愧疚 I cannot have that on my heart.
-是吗 -绝对 - Is that so? - Absolutely.
看着我的眼睛告诉我 Look me in the eye and tell me
这份是正确的食谱 this is the actual recipe.
乔治 在你手里的就是 George, what you have in your hand
正确的详细制作方式 is the exact step-by-step instructions
能让你做出我的招牌牛胸肉 on how to make my brisket.
在今晚之前我从没把这个食谱写下来过 I have never written it down until tonight because...
因为我怕会有人来偷 I was afraid someone might steal it.
但现在我把它托付给你 But I'm entrusting this to you,
希望有一天 时机成熟时 and I hope that someday, when the time is right,
你会传给你其中一个孩子 you will see fit to share it with one of your children.
康妮 我不知道该说什么好 Connie, I don't know what to say.
别叫我康妮 Don't call me Connie.
叫我妈妈 Call me Mom.
谢谢 妈妈 Thanks, Mom.
不客气 儿子 You're welcome, son.
真是个傻子 What a dope.
第二天早上 我爸为了做出完美的牛胸肉 The next morning, my dad embarked on a doomed quest
踏上了注定失败的征途 to make the perfect brisket.
能帮你什么吗 Can I help you?
还真需要你帮忙 Matter of fact, you can.
我需要5公斤特优级安格斯牛胸肉 I need 12 pounds of prime Angus with a medium deckle,
最好是春天宰的 不能晚于六月中旬 ideally slaughtered in the spring, no later than mid-June.
至于腌肉的香料 For the spice rub,
姥姥让他开车去新奥尔良 Meemaw had him drive to New Orleans
到知名咖啡馆买研磨咖啡粉 to buy ground coffee from Cafe Du Monde,
新奥尔良 407公里
以及到一名叫拉沃夫人的女巫那里 and seven ounces of something called "holy ghost root"
19世纪的巫毒女王
买28克的"圣灵根" from a voodoo woman named Madam Laveau.
请问你能磨我的"根"吗 Could you grind my root for me?
我要涂在牛胸上 I-I'm-a... I'm-a rub it on brisket.
回家后 他给牛胸抹上香料的手法 Then back home, he applied the spice rub
充满情欲又温柔 with such erotic tenderness,
我妈都有点妒忌了呢 it made my mother a little jealous.
最终 开始烹饪了 Finally, the cooking began.
弄了整整14小时 14 hours of cooking.
期间不断刷油 And basting.
喷油 And spritzing.
和照料火候 And tending to the fire.
终于到了让胸肉阴凉的步骤 Until it was finally time to let the meat rest.
休息[阴凉]吧 小亲亲 Rest, my darling.
好好休息 Rest.
知名咖啡店的咖啡真好喝呀 Mmm. This Cafe Du Monde coffee is very good.
里面加了菊苣 They make it with chicory.
这对做牛胸肉有什么好处 And what does it do to the brisket?
我不知道 Oh, I have no idea.
那你为什么让乔治大老远跑去新奥尔良 Then why did you send George all the way to New Orleans?
咱家附近买不到这种咖啡啊 Well, they don't sell this around here.
来了 Here we go.
耗时15年零14小时 15 years and 14 hours later.
全德州最好吃的牛胸肉 Best brisket in Texas.
康妮 你这个邪恶的贱人 Connie, you evil bitch!
比普通咖啡丝滑很多呢 It's smoother than regular coffee.
那才不是真的秘方 That wasn't the recipe.
你看着我的眼睛说谎了 You looked me in the eye, and you lied to me.
妈妈 Oh, Mom.
你偷摸闯进我家 想偷食谱 You broke into my home and tried to steal it.
乔治 Oh, George.
你告诉她我们进去过吗 You told her we went over there?
小乔治 Oh, George Jr.
我什么都没招 不是我 I didn't say nothing. I was cool.
真喜欢这台好戏 I am loving this.
我家不再欢迎这个女人来 I don't want this woman in my house anymore.
-她可是我妈 -她就是恶魔 - She is my mother. - She is the devil.
要是孩子们想见她呢 And what if the kids want to see her?
好吧 Fine.
在我不在家时才能来 Schedule it for when I'm not here.
或者等我死了再来 Or when I'm dead.
还有 不许你喝我的咖啡了 And quit drinking my coffee.
把你的火车关掉 我们得谈谈 Turn off your train, we've got to talk.
谈什么 About what?
妈妈为爸爸和姥姥的事很难过 Mom is so upset about Dad and Meemaw,
她可能会想离婚 she might want a divorce.
没人要离婚 No one's getting divorced.
你怎么知道 How do you know?
"真棒" 这下我得把那个扔了 Great, now I have to throw that out.
当女婿的自古以来都瞧不起丈母娘 Mother-in-laws are always held in low regard by the father.
但这很少会导致家庭破裂 It rarely leads to a breakup of the family.
他说得对 He's right.
弗雷德和威尔玛的婚姻依然幸福美满 Fred and Wilma are still happily married.
经典卡通《摩登原始人》中的角色
我想如果你能 I think if we can figure out
想个办法 让爸爸得到姥姥的牛胸肉食谱 a way for Dad to get Meemaw's brisket recipe,
所有矛盾就会消失 this all goes away.
我想不出我们能有什么办法 I don't see how we can accomplish that.
放下 Put that down.
那可不是玩具 That's not a toy.
当然是啦 Sure it is.
呜呜 Choo choo.
呜呜 Choo choo...
呜呜 Choo choo.
张嘴嘴 小饼饼 Open wide, Moonpie.
呜呜小火车来啦 Here comes the choo choo train.
呜呜 Choo choo.
很好吃对吧 Mmm. Isn't that good?
这是姥姥远近驰名的牛胸肉 That's Meemaw's famous brisket.
你想知道食谱吗 Would you like the secret recipe?
你保证不告诉别人 You promise not to tell anybody?
你当然不会告诉别人啦 Of course you're not gonna tell anybody.
我先加入一茶匙孜然 I start with a tablespoon of cumin,
然后加入一杯红糖 之后... and then a cup of brown sugar, and...
我知道姥姥的食谱 I know the recipe.
什么 What?
她告诉我的 She told it to me.
什么时候 When?
1982年2月14日 February 14, 1982.
当时我23个月大 那天是情人节 I was 23 months old, it was Valentine's Day,
爸爸和妈妈出去餐厅吃饭了 and Mom and Dad went out for dinner.
当时你也在场 你不记得吗 You were there. Don't you remember?
一片空白 I got nothing.
那么小的时候的事你真的还记得吗 You can really remember when you were that little?
嗯 你也在场 Uh-huh. You were there, too.
你还在学习自己上厕所 You were still struggling with potty training.
你记错了吧 I don't think so.
没有 姥姥以前都叫你尿裤子先生 Oh, yes. Meemaw used to call you Mr. Soggy Pants.
不可能 Nuh-uh.
尿裤子先生 Mr. Soggy Pants.
闭嘴 这不好笑 Quit it. This is serious.
谢尔顿 你必须把食谱告诉爸爸 Sheldon, you've got to tell Dad that recipe.
但姥姥说这是秘密 But Meemaw told me it was a secret.
你如果不说 等爸妈离婚了 就是你的错 If you don't, and Mom and Dad get a divorce, it's your fault.
好吧 All right.
我说 Fine.
干得漂亮 尿裤子先生 Good job, Soggy Pants.
爸爸 你能来客厅吗 Dad, could you please come into the living room?
干什么 What for?
我的大脑做了超厉害的事 My brain did something impressive
我想和你分享 and I'd like to share it with you.
你怎么会在这儿 What are you doing here?
跟你一样 Same as you.
我想看他的大脑做了什么 I want to see what his brain did.
请坐 Please have a seat.
好吧 All right.
怎么样 Well?
我知道姥姥的牛胸肉烹饪食谱 I know Meemaw's brisket recipe.
什么 What?
你才不知道呢 No, you don't.
我真的知道 Yes, I do.
为了给这个家带来安宁 And in order to bring peace to this family,
我决定公之于众 I'm prepared to make it public.
你想诈我 You're bluffing.
一茶匙孜然 One tablespoon of cumin,
一杯红糖 one cup of brown sugar,
两茶匙烟熏红椒 two tablespoons of smoked paprika...
好了 好了 停 Okay, okay, stop.
不不 继续说 No, no, no. Keep going.
你怎么会知道食谱 谢利 How do you know the recipe, Shelly?
姥姥在1982年的情人节告诉我的 Meemaw told it to me on Valentine's Day, 1982.
你和爸爸去廉价影院 You were out with Dad seeing Cannonball Run
看《炮弹飞车》了 at the dollar theater.
不可能 你当时还不到两岁 That's impossible, you weren't even two years old.
三茶匙干芥末 Three tablespoons of dried mustard,
一杯孤星啤酒 one cup of Lone Star beer...
好了 Okay.
说吧 Go ahead.
告诉你爸爸吧 Give it to your father.
我可以帮你写下来 I can write it down for you.
不用了 我不想要 That's okay, I don't want it.
你逗我呢吧 You have got to be kidding me.
康妮 你有无数的机会 Connie, you've had every opportunity
把食谱给我 但你从来没给 to give me that recipe and you never did,
因为你一直把我当做外人 because you've always treated me like an outsider.
她才没有 No, she has not.
我当然有 Oh, of course I have.
看到没 她承认了 See? She admits it.
我当然承认了 Damn right, I do.
我一直觉得你配不上我女儿 Never thought you were good enough for my daughter.
你就这么出现 骑着那辆破摩托车 There you were, riding around on that dumb motorcycle,
把她肚子搞大 knocking her up.
孩子们 你们都到厨房 Why don't you kids go in the kitchen
自己拿点冰淇淋吃吧 and fix yourselves some ice cream?
我怎么能错过这好戏 I'm not going anywhere.
我能理解 Hey. I get it.
我也有个女儿 I have a daughter.
我也不想她带一个那样的男人回家 I wouldn't want her bringing home someone like that.
但我也比那时候成长了许多 But I've come a hell of a long way since then.
好啦 你说得对 Okay, you're right.
乔治 George.
对不起 I'm sorry.
这对我来说 比任何食谱都更有意义 That means more to me than any recipe.
过来 Come here.
别让这个拥抱骗了你 Don't let the hug fool you.
她一走 他就逼我把食谱告诉他 The minute she went home, he made me give him the recipe.
来啦 处女航 Here we go, maiden voyage.
哎妈呀 Hot damn.
哎妈呀 Hot damn!
乔治 注意说话 George! Language.
谢尔顿 Sheldon.
想来点吗 Want some?
不用了 谢谢 我不饿 Uh, no, thank you. I'm not hungry.