我会告诉它 I'll tell him.
谢尔顿 校长叫你去他办公室 Sheldon, you need to go to the principal's office.
你们每次都要这样 You do that every time.
为什么啊 Why?
好 我马上过去 Uh-huh. Okay. I'll be right there.
怎么了 What's up?
校长叫我过去谈话 Principal wants to talk to me.
别幼稚了 Grow up.
你也来啦 Hello!
你在这里做什么 What are you doing here?
我被叫来校长办公室 I got called to the principal's office.
我也是 So did I.
你做错事了吗 What, you do something wrong?
据我所知应该是没有 Not that I'm aware of.
那你呢 Did you?
希望没有 I hope not.
或许是好消息 Maybe it's good news.
谢尔顿 你有过被叫去校长办公室 Sheldon, you ever been called to the principal's office
就因为有好消息过吗 for good news?
没有 Never.
两位 有好消息 Gentlemen, good news.
我就感觉是这样 I had a feeling.
什么事 What's up?
谢尔顿的学术评估测试预考成绩回来了 We got the PSAT results back, and Sheldon
针对高二学生的标准化考试 考试得分用于国家优异学生奖学金的竞争
谢尔顿得了满分 got a perfect score.
-行啊 -谢了 汤姆 - Neat. - Thanks, Tom.
我会记得把成绩单贴家里冰箱上的 I'll be sure to put that up on the fridge.
你不懂这事情的分量啊 No, you don't understand.
谢尔顿是全校唯一得过满分的学生 Sheldon's the only kid in the school to ever do this.
以他年纪来看 还可能是全国第一个呢 At his age, maybe in the whole country.
我挺享受这考试的 颇有趣 It was fun. I enjoyed it.
这代表什么呢 So what's this mean?
这就像棒球投出了完全比赛[完美]啊 乔治 It means he pitched a perfect game, George.
我已经收到很多大学来询问要见他的电话了 I've already gotten calls from colleges who want to meet him.
找他谈奖学金之类的吗 For, like, scholarships and stuff?
什么都愿意给他啊 For everything!
可能给你钱买下你儿子都愿意 They might even pay you to get him.
我的乖儿子啊 My man!
你上一次洗手是什么时候 When was the last time you washed your hands?
来一下嘛 Come on!
♪ 世上没人比我强壮 ♪ ♪ Nobody else is stronger than I am ♪
♪ 昨天我移了一座山 ♪ ♪ Yesterday I moved a mountain ♪
♪ 我相信我能当你的英雄 ♪ ♪ I bet I could be your hero ♪
♪ 我是个了不起的小家伙 ♪ ♪ I am a mighty little man ♪
少 年
谢尔顿
你们敢相信吗 Can you believe it?
满分呢 Perfect score.
真棒 小饼饼 Good job, moon pie.
而且不止如此 And not just that.
很多大学已经开始想要招揽谢尔顿去读书了 Colleges are already sniffing around to recruit him.
你什么意思 还大学 他才10岁呢 What do you mean, colleges? He's ten.
彼得森校长说加理对我有兴趣 Principal Petersen said Caltech is interested.
加理在哪里 Where's Caltech?
加州啊 老妈 California, Mom.
加州啊 California?!
人家校名里不就有"加"字了吗 It has "Cal" right there in the name.
这个话题你别插嘴 You're not a part of this conversation.
而"理"是"理工"的意思 The "Tech" is for "Technology."
谢利 回你房间 大人们要谈话 Shelly, go to your room. The adults need to talk.
根据今天发生的事情 我要提出我也是大人 Given the events of the day, I would argue I am an adult
我应该被当大人对待 and should be treated as one.
我刚才应该用更好的话来表达我的意思 I probably could've said that differently.
你真心觉得那孩子准备好去上大学了 You honestly think that little boy's ready for college?
我当时还不觉得他可以上高中呢 Hey, I didn't think he was ready for high school,
但你看 一年半过去了 but here we are, a year and a half in,
大家都平安无事 and no one got hurt.
这不一样啊 That is different.
在高中里有你跟小乔治罩着 He's got you and Georgie over there,
而且他到现在还跟老妈老姐同住在家呢 and he's still living at home with his mother and his sister.
还有我呢 And me.
是是是 Sure.
你说的我知道 I understand all that.
那你为什么还这么努力要促成这事 Then why are you pushing so hard for this?
因为这些学校是现在有兴趣啊 Because these schools are interested now.
就像是橄榄球队招揽球员一样 It's like football recruitment.
打铁得趁热啊 You got to strike while the iron's hot.
这跟橄榄球才不一样呢 This is nothing like football.
是吗 那万一他突然哪天不聪明了 Oh, yeah? What if he stops being smart
人家不要他了呢 and they don't want him anymore?
这种事怎么可能发生啊 How is that gonna happen?
我不知道啊 可能撞到头 I don't know. Conks his head?
你能帮忙我说两句吗 Will you help me, please?
抱歉 这个话题我不能插嘴 Sorry, I'm not a part of this conversation.
至少老爸是站在我这边的 At least Dad's on my side.
没用的 妈妈会赢的 Doesn't matter. Mom's gonna win.
每次都是她赢 She always does.
但我总有一天得去上大学啊 But I have to leave for college at some point.
你知道如果你去上了大学 会发生什么事吗 If you went to college, you know what would happen?
我会享受高等教育 I'd enjoy higher learning?
你会死 You would die.
你会蜷曲在地上然后死在那里 You would curl up on the floor and die.
这才不是真的 That's not true.
你连自己的"痛痛"都处理不好 You can't even take care of your own boo-boos.
我告诉你 每个大学里都有 For your information, every college is staffed
专门的医疗职员 with a medical professional.
我的"痛痛"会受到妥善照料 My boo-boos will be well-tended to.
谢尔顿 你过来 Sheldon! Come back in here!
见证结果的时候到了 I guess we'll find out what happened.
我已经知道结果是什么了 老妈赢了 I already know what happened. Mom won.
怎么样了 Well?
谢利 我十分为你的考试成绩为荣 Shelly, I am very proud of you for doing so well on that test.
但你不能去上大学 But you can't go off to college.
-妈 -过几年的话 可以 - Mom! - ‭In a few years, sure.
但现在呢 你就继续跟 But, right now, you can just keep taking
斯特吉斯博士上你的那堂大学课吧 your one college class with Dr. Sturgis.
我为什么不能去大学全职读书 Why can't I go there full-time?
宝贝 那里开车要一个小时 Oh, baby, it's an hour away.
我们不能天天这么开车送你上下学啊 We can't drive you back and forth every day.
载他去的人是我好吗 I'm the one who's been driving him.
她可喜欢载我了 And she loves it.
她怎么能这么聪明 How can he be so smart
又这么不懂人情世故呢 and so clueless at the same time?
斯特吉斯博士住在学校 他当我的监护人呢 Dr. Sturgis lives at the school. What if he acted as my guardian?
这也是个办法 That's an idea.
疯了的办法 A crazy one.
只有上课的晚上在那里住啊 But it would only be on school nights.
-谢利 -这样的话我聪明又有何意义呢 - Shelly. - What's the point of being intelligent
如果这样的机会我都不能把握 if I can't take advantage of opportunities like this?
他们还在谈 They're still discussing.
老妈没赢吗 Mom didn't win?
战况一触即发 It's touch and go.
真是不敢相信 Crazy.
跟约翰住有那么疯狂吗 Is staying with John really that crazy?
当然啊 他屁都不了解小孩 Yes. He doesn't know squat about kids.
你们怎么还真在考虑这事 Why are you even considering this?
上帝给了谢尔顿这些能力 Well, the Lord gave Shelly these abilities,
我不想自己成为了阻止他发挥的人 and I don't want to be the one holding him back.
好啦 我再去问他 Okay. I'll ask him.
但我挺确定你们会收到什么答案 But I'm pretty sure I know what answer you're gonna get.
当然可以 怕什么 Sure! What the heck?
你真的觉得自己能搞定 Do you really think you could handle
跟一个十岁小孩同住吗 living with a ten-year-old?
他只是生理上还10岁 Oh, he's only biologically ten.
在其他方面 他跟我一样老了 In every other way, he's as old as I am.
约翰 我觉得你没意识到 John, I don't think you realize
这事情所带来的责任 the responsibility involved here.
那我们何不来一次试验呢 Well, why don't we have a trial run?
让他来跟我同住几天 看看事情的发展 Have him spend a couple days with me and see how it goes.
试验吗 A trial run, huh?
就像是太空计划一样啊 Like the space program.
你不会直接把人送上太空 You don't send people up right away;
你先从把他们放进那个 you start by spinning them around in that thing
会一直旋转让他们呕吐的机器 that makes them throw up.
我不知道了 I don't know.
康妮 尽管外表有点像 Connie, despite appearances,
但我并不是那种常见的不问世事 I'm not some stereotypical absentminded professor
连个室内盆栽都照顾不好的教授啊 who can't take care of a houseplant.
没没 我没那个意思 No, no, I wasn't saying that.
好啦 我可能是有点这意思 Yeah, maybe I was.
这样吧 Here's an idea.
你可以跟谢尔顿来一起跟我住啊 Why don't you and Sheldon come live with me?
然后你就能照顾我们两个 And then you can take care of both of us.
试验期感觉是正确的选择 Trial run sounds like the way to go.
还没准备好要同居是吧 Not ready to shack up, are you?
-没呢 -可恶 - No. - ‭Darn it.
地球形成大概有45亿年了 The Earth is about 4.5 billion years old.
按宇宙的标准来说 还... In the Cosmic Calendar, it's...
谢利 我们需要跟你谈谈 Shelly, we need to talk to you.
好 All right.
姥姥跟斯特吉斯博士谈过了 Meemaw spoke to Dr. Sturgis...
然后呢 And?
然后... And...
他愿意让你去他家住 he was open to you staying.
太好了 我什么时候能去 Yes! When can I go?
等等 你先别着急 Now, hold on. Before you get ahead of yourself,
这只是一次试验 住一晚而已 this is just a trial run, for one night.
而哪怕这次成果很好 And even if it goes well,
也不会立刻就明天让你去上大学 you're not starting college tomorrow.
只是看看这能不能当成未来的考虑方案 It's just to see if this is an option for the future.
懂吗 You understand?
懂 Yes.
光是想到 The prospect of advancing
我有机会进入下一个学术阶段让我兴奋无比 to the next stage of academia had me feeling giddy.
能自己整理行李箱更是锦上添花 And, on top of that, I got to pack a suitcase,
这感觉就像是用内衣裤玩俄罗斯方块 which is like playing Tetris but with underwear.
谢利 你要是紧张是没关系的 You know, Shelly, it's okay if you're a little nervous.
你可以告诉我 You can tell me.
我不紧张啊 I'm not nervous.
好吧 All right.
我在你这么大的时候 When I was your age, a lot of times,
常常得去我爷爷奶奶家度过周末 I'd have to spend the weekend with my grandparents,
那总会令我感到害怕 and that always frightened me,
因为他们晚上总是会把假牙到处乱丢 'cause they'd leave their teeth all over the place.
我从没跟别人说 但我希望我当时有说 I never told anybody, but I wish I had.
的确听起来是不开心的回忆 幸好我比你勇敢 That does sound upsetting. Good thing I'm braver than you.
我只是想告诉你 I'm just saying, it can be tough
在没有妈妈的陪伴下去新地方住可能很难 sleeping in a new place without your mom.
斯特吉斯博士会在啊 他就像个妈妈 Dr. Sturgis will be there. He's like a mom.
但他比普通妈妈聪明 But he's really smart.
欢迎啊 Welcome!
请进请进 Come in, come in!
你很喜欢黑板啊 You like chalkboards, huh?
是的 没错 Indeed, I do. ‭Huh.
其实我家卫生间里都有一个呢 In fact, I even have one in the bathroom.
谁知道什么时候会突然来灵感呢 You never know when inspiration will strike.
我或许是东德州最幸运的孩子了吧 I may be the luckiest boy in East Texas.
我知道今天是周四 I know it's Thursday,
所以今晚是热狗丁意大利面 so dinner will be spaghetti and hot dogs.
为了娱乐 And, for fun,
我还录好了几集《宇宙 个人游记》来看 I have a few episodes of Cosmos recorded.
不是"或许" 我就是最幸运的孩子 Forget "Maybe." I am the luckiest boy.
别忘了 明天还有课 他七点半就得睡觉 Remember, it's a school night, so his bedtime is 7:30.
我也是呢 Mine, too!
♪ 好遥远 ♪ ♪ So far away ♪
So Far Away - 卡罗尔·金
♪ 是不是没人愿意留在一个地方了 ♪ ♪ Doesn't anybody stay in one place anymore? ♪
闭嘴吧 卡罗尔·金 Shut up, Carole King.
《宇宙 个人游记》
边吃晚餐边看《宇宙 个人游记》吗 Watching Cosmos while we're eating dinner?
我是清醒的吗 因为这感觉像在做梦 Am I awake? Because this feels like a dream.
对我来说不是 在梦里 Oh, not for me. In my dreams,
我通常都在逃命 躲避一只巨大的螳螂 I'm usually running for my life from a giant praying mantis.
螳螂就是那种 That's the insect
交配后雌性会把雄性吃掉的昆虫吗 where the female eats the male after mating?
没错 It is.
我想我明白你为什么还没结婚了 I think I understand why you're not married.
这只"小猪"可真美 This little piggy's looking good.
宝贝 Hey, baby.
-嗨 -要帮忙吗 - Hey. ‭- Need any help?
不用 No.
你涂完想帮我涂吗 Do you want to do mine next?
为什么 Why?
这好像是母女之间会做的事 Well, just seems like a thing mothers and daughters might do.
你是哪里不对劲 What's wrong with you?
没有啊 Nothing.
算了 Never mind.
小乔治 你在干什么 Georgie, what you up to?
我这一生 All my life,
都想知道地球以外是否有生命 I've wondered about life beyond the Earth.
在我们认为绕着其他太阳转的无数行星上 On those countless other planets that we think circle other suns,
是否也有生命存在 is there also life?
外星世界的生命跟我们类似吗 Might the beings of other worlds resemble us,
还是跟我们截然不同 or would they be astonishingly different?
你相信宇宙中 Do you believe there's
有智慧生命吗 intelligent life in the universe?
毫不怀疑 I have no doubt.
为什么 Why is that?
德雷克公式主张仅在我们的银河系 The Drake Equation claims that there are at least
就可探测出至少20种文明 20 detectable civilizations in our Milky Way galaxy alone.
有意思 Interesting.
我姐姐喜欢说我是外星人 My sister likes to say that I'm an alien.
我也常被那么叫 I've often been called that.
有一次还是被我梦里那只大螳螂 Once by the praying mantis in my dream.
也许我们真的是外星人 Maybe we are aliens.
有可能 Perhaps.
又或者像你和我这样的人 Or maybe people like you and me
才是地球的原始居民 were the original inhabitants of Earth,
其他人都是从外太空来的 and everyone else is from outer space.
我更喜欢这种理论 Ooh, I like that better.
在星星之间的极致黑暗中 还有... In the great dark between the stars, there also are...
吃完晚餐后 你想用本生灯 After dinner, want to toast marshmallows
烤棉花糖吃吗 on a Bunsen burner?
老天 超想 Good gosh, yes.
想出去吃冰淇淋吗 Want to go out and get some ice cream?
我在看电视 I'm watching this.
看完之后去呗 Well, when it's over.
不是很想 Not really.
好吧 Okay.
想玩大富翁吗 我可以让你用顶针棋 Want to play Monopoly? I'll let you be the thimble.
切 Well, pooh to you.
是啊 Oh, yeah.
给你用小狗棋呢 What about the little dog?
不玩 Nope.
最后 我们击打打火石 Finally, we strike the flint
同时调大本生灯的煤气 while turning up the gas of the Bunsen burner.
我不常说这话 但刚才的讲解 I don't say this often, but that may have been
可能是完美的安全讲座 the perfect safety lecture.
多谢夸奖 Thank you.
你是客人 你先 You're my guest. After you.
这很像坐在篝火旁 This is like being around a campfire,
只是我没那么狼狈不堪 only I'm not miserable.
你想边坐在这临时篝火旁 Would you like me to sing a cowboy song
边听我唱牛仔歌曲吗 while we sit around our makeshift campfire?
好啊 I would like that.
♪ 可怜的牛仔 ♪ ♪ Oh, pity the cowboy ♪
♪ 全身都是鲜红血液 ♪ ♪ All bloody and red ♪
♪ 因为野马倒在了他身上 ♪ ♪ For the bronco fell on him ♪
♪ 狠狠砸到他的脑袋 ♪ ♪ And bashed in his head ♪
♪ 马鞍上沾了血 ♪ ♪ There was blood on the saddle ♪
♪ 到处都是血 ♪ ♪ And blood all around ♪
♪ 地上还有一呀么 ♪ ♪ And a great big puddle of blood ♪
♪ 一大滩血 ♪ ♪ On the ground. ♪
字母"N" "N."
这词组一共有两个"N" And there are two "N"s.
好 All right.
你想去打几局保龄球吗 You want to go bowl a few frames?
你没看见我在看《幸运之轮》吗 Don't you see me watching the Wheel?
你直接说"不去"就行了 You can just say "No."
不去 No.
你今晚跟约翰说过话吗 Have you talked to John tonight?
-说过 -然后呢 - Yeah. - ‭And?
他和谢尔顿在看电视 而且旁边没人在吵吵 He and Sheldon were watching TV without anybody yakking at 'em.
我要回家了 I'm going home.
谢谢你过来 Thanks for stopping by.
买个元音 买个元音 Buy a vowel. Buy a vowel.
如果你希望我帮你掖被子 我准备好了 If you like being tucked in, I'm prepared to do it.
我用一个西瓜练习过 I practiced on a watermelon.
不用了 我都是自己掖被子 That's okay. I'm a self-tucker.
好吧 有什么需要 我就在房间里 Very well. Now, I'll be in my room if you need me.
这里有杯水 Here's a glass of water
你渴了可以喝 if you get thirsty.
黑板那放了新粉笔 And there's fresh chalk on the blackboard
以防你深夜突然来了灵感 in case of any late-night epiphanies.
很好 Excellent.
对了 如果你姥姥问我今晚表现如何 Oh, and, uh... if your meemaw asks how I did tonight,
希望你能给我正面的评语 I hope you'll give me a positive review.
三星 Three stars.
-满分三星吗 -对 - Out of three? - Yes.
太棒了 Wonderful!
你好 Hi.
-有什么事 -我给你烤了个派 - What do you want? - I baked you a pie.
为什么 Why?
我觉得我们之前的邻里关系 Well, I was thinking we haven't had
并不太和睦 the best history as neighbors.
那是因为我们讨厌对方 That's 'cause we don't like each other.
没错 所以我想着我们可以坐下一起吃大黄派 Right, so I thought we could sit down over a slice of rhubarb pie
摒弃前嫌 and, you know, forgive and forget.
我没做过什么需要被原谅的事 I haven't done anything that needs forgiving.
好吧 那听上去是我们可以坐下 Okay, well, that sounds like something
边吃派边聊的话题 we could sit down and talk about over the pie.
妈妈 我又流血了 Mom, I'm bleeding again!
玛丽 谢谢你的好意 You know what, Mary? I appreciate it,
但现在不是时候 but this isn't a great time.
鲍比用叉子刺伤了比利的小腿 Bobbi stabbed Billy in the leg with a fork.
老天爷啊 他没事吧 Good Lord. Is he okay?
是塑料叉 但还是刮破不小的伤口 It was a plastic fork, but it broke the skin pretty good.
好吧 我明白 Oh, okay, I-I understand.
不如我先收下派 跟你改日再聚 How about I take that pie and give you a rain check?
好啊 Um, sure...
我被叉子戳出的洞里好像有黄芥末酱 I think there's mustard in the fork holes!
我得走了 Got to go.
烤盘你可以留着 You can keep the pan!
谢尔顿 Sheldon.
你为什么要跑 Why are you running?
我只是想亲亲你 I just want to kiss you.
天啊 天啊 Oh, dear. Oh, dear.
斯特吉斯博士 Dr. Sturgis?
谢尔顿 Oh, Sheldon.
很高兴见到你 So nice to see you.
你好像绊倒 并撞到头了 I think you tripped and hit your head.
我是有点晕 I'm a bit woozy.
我帮你测试一下有没有脑震荡 I better test for concussion.
你叫什么名字 What's your name?
约翰·伯吉斯·斯特吉斯 John Burgess Sturgis.
-伯吉斯·斯特吉斯 这名字真拉风 -谢谢 - Burgess Sturgis? Great name. - Thank you.
现任美国总统是谁 Who's the president of the United States?
乔治·赫伯特·沃克·布什 George Herbert Walker Bush.
我更喜欢伯吉斯·斯特吉斯 I like Burgess Sturgis better.
当然啦 因为这名字押韵 'Cause it rhymes, sure.
最后一个问题 唯一一个 Last question. What is the only fermion
可能没有反粒子的费密子是哪个 that may not have an antiparticle?
这还用问吗 是中微子 The neutrino, of course.
我可以排除脑震荡的可能了 I'm gonna rule out concussion.
说句公道话 这问题很简单 To be fair, it was an easy question.
也是 在这等着 我去拿冰块给你敷在头上 True. Wait here. I'm going to go get some ice for your head
然后再给你冲杯热饮 and I'll fix you a hot beverage.
水槽里有包伯爵茶包 Oh. There's a, there's an Earl Grey tea bag in the sink.
应该还能泡出点茶味 I think it still has some oomph in it.
你在干什么 Hey, what you doing?
跟看上去的差不多 Pretty much what it looks like.
想有人陪陪你吗 Would you like some company?
好啊 Sure, I guess.
当然了 如果你宁愿看电视 我就不烦你了 Of course, if you'd rather watch TV, I could leave you alone.
不不 这只是重播 Oh, no, no. No, it's a rerun.
但就算不是重播... But even if it weren't...
怎... 怎么了 Hey, what... what's wrong?
没什么 继续 Nothing. Keep going.
玛丽 Mary?
乔治 我很想我的宝贝儿子 George, I just miss my little boy so much,
他永远不会回来了 因为他不需要他妈妈 and he's never gonna come back 'cause he doesn't need his mama.
亲爱的 他当然会回来了 Oh, baby, of course he'll come back.
不 你该看看他有多开心 No, you should've seen how happy he was.
好吧 我们还有小乔治和米希呢 All right, well, still got Georgie and Missy.
糟了 Uh, oh, dear.
糟了 糟了 糟了 Oh, dear, oh, dear, oh, dear.
糟了 Oh, dear.
斯特吉斯博士 你的茶着火了 Dr. Sturgis, your tea is on fire!
老天 幸好我们先试验了一回 Boy, it's a good thing we did this trial run.
可不是嘛 外面好冷 No kidding. Ooh, it's chilly out.
我改变主意了 I changed my mind.
我永远不想离开这里 I don't want to leave here ever.
你永远不必离开 You'll never have to.
你当时在想什么 居然让我照顾一个孩子 What were you thinking letting me take care of a child?
我不会再犯同样的错误了 I won't make that mistake again.
我看起来像仙女保姆吗 Do I look like Mary Poppins?
虽然我那么聪明 但我当时却用 As smart as I am, I tried to put out a fire
氧气和纸来灭火 with oxygen and paper.
没关系 没人受伤 It's ok. No one got hurt.
我可能真的有脑震荡 I may actually have had a concussion.
你有什么症状 What are your symptoms?
我觉得自己 It feels like there's
脑袋上有头发 hair on my head.
他没事吧 Hey. He okay?
他很好 Yeah, he's fine.
你感觉如何 How are you doing?
好多了 Much better.
我刚才坐在这里想 You know, I've just been sitting here thinking
我来回各开了一个小时车去把他俩载回来呢 I've drove an hour both ways to bring the two of them back.
我人可真好啊 Pretty damn decent of me.
过来 Come in.