m 211 -8 b 217 -6 217 -4 217 -2 l 217 24 b 217 26 217 29 211 31 l 31 31 b 26 29 26 26 26 24 l 26 -2 b 26 -4 26 -6 31 -8
m 50 0 l 179 0 b 208 0 229 21 229 50 l 229 179 b 229 208 208 228 179 228 l 50 228 b 21 228 0 208 0 179 l 0 50 b 0 21 21 0 50 0
m 0 0 b 1 -1 2 -2 4 -1 b 7 1 3 2 5 5 b 6 7 8 7 9 5 l 15 -6 b 18 -7 20 -6 20 -3 b 19 -1 17 2 17 4 b 16 7 20 7 21 6 b 22 4 23 2 25 -1 b 27 -2 29 -1 29 1 b 29 2 28 3 29 5 b 30 7 32 7 33 6 b 34 5 34 4 35 3 b 37 2 39 3 39 5 b 39 6 38 8 37 9 b 34 13 29 13 25 9 b 22 13 17 13 13 9 b 10 13 3 13 0 8
m 325 0 l 355 0 l 332 47 l 354 47 l 399 136 l 369 136 l 328 53 l 288 136 l 257 136 l 325 0 m 467 0 l 497 0 l 474 47 l 496 47 l 541 136 l 511 136 l 470 53 l 430 136 l 399 136 l 467 0 m 545 1 l 583 1 l 583 14 l 568 14 l 568 19 l 583 19 l 583 30 l 568 30 l 568 34 l 599 34 l 599 30 l 583 30 l 583 19 l 599 19 l 599 14 l 583 14 l 583 1 l 611 1 b 616 1 622 6 622 10 l 622 36 l 652 0 l 678 0 l 644 41 l 622 41 l 622 47 l 596 47 l 597 54 l 625 54 l 625 68 l 541 68 l 541 54 l 572 54 l 571 47 l 545 47 l 545 1 m 583 72 l 583 85 l 569 85 l 569 90 l 598 90 l 598 85 l 583 85 l 583 72 l 611 72 b 615 72 621 78 621 82 l 653 44 l 678 44 l 644 86 l 621 86 l 621 103 l 597 103 l 597 136 l 570 136 l 564 126 l 562 136 l 542 136 l 548 107 l 568 107 l 565 121 l 571 121 l 571 103 l 547 103 l 547 72 l 583 72 m 600 107 l 620 107 l 624 124 l 653 89 l 679 89 l 642 136 l 615 136 l 618 132 l 606 132 l 600 107 m 689 0 l 716 0 l 721 15 l 732 15 l 732 30 l 718 56 l 731 56 l 735 100 l 721 100 l 717 59 l 714 64 l 714 136 l 693 136 l 693 79 l 676 79 l 707 30 l 679 30 l 679 15 l 694 15 l 689 0 m 738 0 l 804 0 b 807 0 813 6 813 9 l 813 87 l 794 87 l 794 14 l 756 14 l 756 87 l 763 77 l 763 21 l 787 21 l 787 91 l 798 91 l 798 120 l 820 120 l 812 136 l 778 136 l 778 90 l 748 136 l 723 136 l 756 87 l 738 87 l 738 0 m 257 151 l 275 151 l 297 182 l 319 151 l 337 151 l 304 197 l 304 227 l 290 227 l 290 197 l 257 151 m 337 151 l 355 151 l 377 182 l 399 151 l 417 151 l 384 197 l 384 227 l 370 227 l 370 197 l 337 151 m 425 192 l 447 192 b 445 181 427 181 425 192 l 410 192 b 414 162 458 162 462 192 l 462 206 l 425 206 b 425 210 429 212 433 213 l 462 213 l 462 227 l 433 227 b 412 227 408 203 410 192 m 462 151 l 532 151 l 532 165 l 504 165 l 504 227 l 489 227 l 489 165 l 462 165 l 462 151 m 580 172 l 580 186 l 549 186 b 543 186 543 192 549 192 l 565 192 b 589 192 589 227 565 227 l 532 227 l 532 213 l 565 213 b 570 213 570 206 565 206 l 549 206 b 524 206 524 172 549 172 l 580 172 m 592 213 l 606 213 l 606 227 l 592 227 l 592 213 m 639 172 l 665 172 l 665 186 l 639 186 b 623 186 623 213 639 213 l 665 213 l 665 227 l 639 227 b 603 227 603 172 639 172 m 700 184 b 722 184 722 215 700 215 l 700 229 b 740 229 740 170 700 170 b 660 170 660 229 700 229 l 700 215 b 680 215 680 184 700 184 m 737 172 l 782 172 b 803 172 813 177 813 198 l 813 228 l 799 228 l 799 198 b 799 186 793 187 782 187 l 782 228 l 768 228 l 768 187 l 752 187 l 752 228 l 737 228 l 737 172
原创翻译 双语字幕
最新连载海外影视剧下载 请登陆 www.YYeTs.com 仅供交流学习 禁止商用盈利
m 200 -1 l 200 13 l 19 13 b 14 12 14 6 14 6 b 14 6 14 0 19 -1
m 38 -1 l 44 6 l 38 13 l 19 13 b 14 12 14 6 14 6 b 14 6 14 0 19 -1
翻译 洗七里 Flora哎呀呀 尤妮希
翻译 亲爱的小饭 永不道歉赛太公
校对 新浪微博@赛太公
时间轴 三水
后期 瓜瓜
总监 生无可恋瓜
家 庭
摩 登
第十季 第九集
搞什么鬼 What the hell?
我的天 他把妈的旧车也拖来了 Oh, my God. He brought Mom's old car?
要知道 那玩意再适合迪迪不过了 You know, that thing was perfect for Dede --
又吵 又偏左[派] loud, pulled way to the left,
还总在公共场合抽风 and constantly broke down in public.
我前妻迪迪两个月前去世了 My ex-wife, Dede, died two months ago,
她丈夫杰瑞把她想留给我们的破烂 and her husband, Jerry, drove down with a bunch of junk
都拉了过来 she wanted us to have.
我一直很喜欢杰瑞 I always liked Jerry.
那你为什么总用奇怪的眼神看他 Then why did you always look at him funny?
因为我知道他所要面临的悲惨命运 Because I knew what he was in for.
我看人们登上泰坦尼克号的录像时 Same way I look at the footage of those people
也是那种眼神 boarding the Titanic.
杰 这是给你的 Jay, this is for you.
老天爷 那是她的灰吗 Oh, God. Is that her?
不不不 这是你们度蜜月时 No, no, no. Apparently this is a jar of sand
从迈阿密海滩带回的沙子 from your honeymoon in Miami Beach.
是啊 当时我们住在枫丹白露酒店 Oh, yeah. We stayed at the Fontainebleau.
猜猜我们在电梯里遇到了谁 ‭Guess who we took an elevator with?
杰基·格利森[演员] Jackie Gleason.
我告诉他我们才在《蜜月期》 I told him we were the honeymooners,
他开玩笑威胁要把迪迪揍到月亮上去 and, as a joke, he threatened to punch Dede to the moon.
笑点在哪 Why is that funny?
我就是这个意思 哪里好笑 Well, that's my point. It wasn't right.
克莱尔 你妈想把她的旧跑车留给你 Claire, your mom wanted you to have her old sports car.
太好了 Oh, great.
米奇尔 她的珠宝给你 And Mitchell, you get to keep her jewelry.
这么说克莱尔得到了跑车 Oh, so Claire gets a car,
而我得到了一盒子绿松石 and I get a, uh, box of turquoise.
你想交换吗 Want to trade?
不 这样挺好的 No. No, it's fine.
我家有个"不到十三岁的少女" I have a preteen girl at home,
"她"喜欢玩扮装游戏 and she likes to play dress-up.
再说 莉莉或许也会喜欢 And, you know, Lily might like it, too.
米奇尔 克莱尔 迪迪想让你俩决定 Mitchell and Claire, Dede wanted you two to decide
谁把她带回家 who gets to keep her.
抱歉 杰 她没把你包括在内 Sorry, Jay. She left you out of this one.
别担心 杰瑞 我有沙子就够了 No worries, Jerr. I'm good with the sand.
等等 你说"把她带回家"是什么意思 Hang on. Uh, what do you mean, "Gets to keep her"?
那就是迪迪 That's Dede.
我们把她的骨灰和根垛有机融合在一起了 We had her ashes organically fused with the root ball.
太像老妈的风格了 That is so Mom.
是啊 最后还要留样东西让我们争 I know. Setting up one last thing for us to fight over,
因为我们谁都不想要那棵树 because neither of us want that tree.
因为我们都想要那棵树 Because both of us want the tree.
什么 What?
轻松解决 That was easy.
酷 Oh, cool.
看 外婆把她家的旧玩具箱留给我们了 Look. Nana left us her old toy box from her house.
保佑她那颗有囤积症的心 Aww, bless her hoarding heart.
还记得我过去总躲在这里 Remember how I used to hide in here
像吓人的怪物一样跳出来吗 and pop out like a scary monster?
那时的我未来还一片大好 I had so much promise back then.
能震动的棍马 A stick horse that vibrates?
我一直搞不懂用意 I never got the point.
我说不好 I don't know,
但我记得过去一"骑"就是好久 but I remember spending hours riding on it.
我也是 Same.
快看这个 艾丽克斯 Oh. Lookie here, Alex.
你最大屈辱的根源 The source of your greatest shame --
我能解开但你解不开的积木拼图 the puzzle that I solved but you never did.
谁在乎 Who cares?
当时我们都是蠢小孩 We were just dumb kids.
不 Uh, no.
我们才是蠢小孩 We were dumb kids,
而你是小天才 and you were the genius.
那肯定让你寝食难安吧 That must eat away at you.
拜托 Please.
我是名牌大学的尖子生 I'm top of my class at a prestigious university,
我和别人共同发明了一种 and I co-invented a technology
应用于天体物理学和医学的技术 that has applications to astrophysics and medicine.
把那该死的积木拼图给我 And give me that damn puzzle!
我的天 是露露 Oh, my God, it's Lulu!
她曾是我最喜欢的玩具 She was my favorite toy.
我猜我只是很想念外婆 I guess I-I just really miss Nana.
我还怀孕了 Also I'm pregnant.
迪兰和我还没告诉任何人 Dylan and I haven't told anyone
因为我还在努力接受这个事实 because I'm still trying to get my head around it,
可抱着露露让一切变得那么真实 but holding Lulu made it so real.
我就要有一个活生生的宝宝了 I'm gonna have an actual baby.
我压力好大 Aah, I'm so stressed!
我真希望现在还是五十年代 I wish it was the '50s
那时人们还认为怀孕时喝酒抽烟 when it was still healthy to drink and smoke
不会不健康 when you're pregnant.
我等不及翻新这台宝贝了 I cannot wait to restore this baby.
高中时欺负我的恶霸就有一台 My high school bully had one.
你肯定想不到这车能跑多快 You'd be surprised how fast this thing can go.
能轻松追上骑着单车 No problem catching up with a kid on a bike
提前十分钟离校逃跑的孩子 who left school 10 minutes early.
我不确定我希望车库里 I don't know if I want another
又多一件慢慢生锈的半成品 half-finished project rusting away in the garage.
我放弃机器割草机的唯一原因 The only reason I stopped working on robot lawnmower
是因为它开始变得太聪明了 was 'cause he started getting too smart.
别这样 亲爱的 我们留着吧 Come on, honey. Let's keep it.
它让我想起我妈能有多疯狂 It reminds me of how crazy my mom could be.
什么样的老妈会有这样的车 I mean, what mother has a car like this?
这样如何 我们开出去兜一圈 How's this? We take it for one drive.
假如回来时你脸上没有笑容 If you're not smiling by the time we come back,
我们就不要了 we get rid of it.
-只兜一圈 -只兜一圈 - One drive? - ‭One drive.
-只兜一圈 -只兜一圈 - One drive. - ‭One drive.
她过去总把我和米奇尔 Ugh, she used to double-buckle me and Mitchell
一起绑在副驾 into the front seat.
再加上她自制的电热毯 Between that and the homemade electric blankets,
我俩还活着简直是奇迹 it's a wonder we're still alive.
怎么请了水管工 What's with the plumber?
乔又把海王玩具冲下马桶了吗 Did Joe flush his Aquaman down the toilet again?
不 我那些亲戚离开时 No. When my cousins left,
告诉我客房没有热水 they said that the hot water in the guest bedroom was not working.
水管工刚才说一切正常 The plumber just said that there's nothing wrong.
是有人把热水关了 Someone turned it off.
八成是乔 Probably Joe.
我们要怎么罚他 So, what are we thinking?
一周不准约小朋友来家玩 No play dates for a week?
我知道是你关的 I know it was you.
你想让他们走 就把他们冻走了 You wanted them gone, and you froze them out.
我不承认有做过 I'm admitting nothing,
但你说你的一个亲戚会来这里住一天 but you said one cousin would be here for one day,
结果三个人在这里住了一周 and there were three here for a week.
我才没说过 I never said that.
为什么杰瑞还在这 Why is Jerry still here?
是啊 肯定出什么事了 I know. Something must be wrong.
他像个受伤的小老头一样坐在车里 He's sitting in the car like a sad little man.
我们得让他进来坐坐 We have to go and invite him in.
别 别 别 他总会走的 No, no, no, no. He'll move off eventually.
歌洛... 周四的街道清扫会扫走他的 Glor-- Street sweeping is Thursday.
杰瑞 你还好吗 Jerry, is everything okay?
你的车需要人帮忙推一把吗 Yeah, does your truck need a push?
这就是最该死的地方 It's the darnedest thing.
我好像开不走了 I can't seem to drive away.
放下迪迪的东西是要做的最后一件事 Dropping off Dede's stuff was the last check on the ol' list.
我现在很迷茫[迷路] Heck if I'm now feeling pretty lost.
我懂 你沿这条街往前开 Yeah, I get it. Listen, you just drive down this street,
右转 就到高速路了 turn right, and you'll hit the freeway.
杰瑞 进来坐坐吧 Jerry, just come inside.
不了 我不用了 No, I couldn't.
对 要爱戴有尊严的男人 Yeah, got to love a man with pride.
那颗自豪的心送你快乐上高速 That's the thing that'll serve you well on the freeway.
进来吧 我给你做点吃的 Just come inside, I'll make you something to eat,
你想待多久就待多久 and you can stay as long as you want.
是吧 杰 Right, Jay?
总有一天 歌洛莉亚 One of these days, Gloria.
总有一天干嘛 One of these days what?
没什么 我就随口一说 Nothing. Just one of these days.
好了 我们把妈妈放在哪里好呢 All right. Where should we put Mom?
不能离窗户太近 Uh, not too close to the window.
不想以后二十年为了不让她听到小声说话 Don't want to spend the next 20 years whispering.
好 这么说 你妈可以是棵树 Okay, so, your mom can be a tree,
但是我跟你说我的叔叔霍纳斯 but when I told you my Uncle Honus
跌进打谷机 结果来年春天 fell into a thresher and the next spring,
一只长得和他一模一样猫头鹰带着他的 an owl appered with his exact face
怀表出现的时候 你嗤之以鼻 and pocket watch, you poo-pooed it.
你为什么非要为难我 Why are you being so difficult?
因为我们最初在一起的时候 Because when we first got together,
你答应我有一天我们会搬回 you promised that someday we would move back
我们家的农场 但是每一年 to my family farm, and every year,
这所谓的终有一天都被抛在脑后 the someday gets kicked further down the road
像爱管闲事的人口普查员被嫌弃一样 like a nosy census taker.
而且 一旦你把你妈种在这里 And -- And once you plant your mom here,
我们就永远别想走了 we're never gonna leave.
这么说有点过 That's crazy.
而且我 我觉得你应该不想 And I-I-I don't think you want to talk
跟我扯到我们以前做过的承诺吧 about promises we made back then.
你什么意思 What are you suggesting?
-我说到的都做到了 -真的吗 - I've kept every promise I've made. - ‭Really?
你答应过在我余生的每个月送我一枝玫瑰 You promised me a rose a month for the rest of my life,
所以我估计这么算我已经死了十五年了 so I guess I dropped dead 15 years ago.
我读了一篇文章说这样对环境... I read an article that said it was environmentally ins--
我就没见你看过书 I've never seen you read an article.
还有 你说你一定会看《E.T》 Also, you said you'd finally watch "E.T.",
我有史以来的最爱电影 my all-time favorite movie.
那个电影太蠢了 Oh, it just seems so stupid.
有什么好看的 What am I caring about?
一个皱巴巴的木偶 A wrinkly puppet with a Christmas light
吓人的指尖还长着圣诞彩灯 at the end of his creepy finger?
真要这么比吗 我说我会看 And really? Me saying I would watch
什么感人热泪电影和你答应我有一天 some pandering sap-fest is the same
我能和家人重聚能一样吗 as you saying I would someday be reunited with my family?
承诺就是承诺 A promise is a promise.
太同意了 I couldn't agree more.
简直不能更同意 I couldn't agree more.
所以 你基本没错过多少好戏 So, anyway, you haven't missed much around here.
抱歉给你们添麻烦 I'm sorry to be such a burden.
我不知道怎么从这件事走出来 It's just I don't know how to move on.
我一直在拼命烧香 I've been going through incense like crazy.
可怜人 Oh, poor man.
来 吃点东西 Here. Eat something.
我知道你吃素 所以我做了番茄汤 I know you're a vegetarian, so I made you tomato soup.
看起来很好吃 有没有给我剩一点 That looks pretty good. You have any left over for me?
我扔了 Aw, I threw it out.
我知道你不喜欢任何东西待太久 I know that you don't like things staying around too long.
她在生我的气 She's mad at me.
她的亲戚待得太久了 我不欢迎他们 Her family overstayed their welcome,
就把热水停了 and I turned off the hot water,
还把房间里的灯泡卸了几个 took a few bulbs out of the room.
你懂的 婚后生活 You know how it is when you're married.
迪迪和我从没拌过嘴 Dede and I never had a cross word.
真的假的 What?
那不可能 That is not possible.
是真的 如果气氛开始紧张 Yep. If things ever got heated,
我就走到她身后 I'd come up behind her,
把我的手缠绕到她脖子上 put my hands on her neck...
这想法我也有过 I'm with you so far.
然后给她按摩 跟她说她是对的 ...then massage her and tell her she was right.
但是如果是她的错呢 But what if she wasn't right?
那只是自尊心作祟 That's ego talking.
在佛教里 我们相信战胜自己 In Buddhism, we believe it's better to conquer yourself
要比赢一千场战役好得多 than win a thousand battles.
怪不得尼泊尔每次奥运都"大获全胜" That's why Nepal is always crushing it at the Olympics.
杰 明智的男人会走过去 Jay, an enlightened man would go over there
说"歌洛莉亚 我爱你并且尊重你" and say, "Gloria, I love and respect you,
所以毋庸置疑我也爱你的家人且尊重他们 so of course I love and respect your family.
对不起" I am sorry."
但是都是她的错 But it was all her fault.
她不愿意承认 但是她跟我说的就是 She wouldn't admit it, but she told me
一个亲戚来这待一天 one person was staying with us for one day.
这是她的原话[短信] 但是她言下之意是什么 That's her text, but what was her subtext?
杰瑞 你真是个天才 Jerry, you're a genius.
她给我发过短信 She sent me a text.
我有证据 I have the proof.
歌洛莉亚 Gloria?
-干嘛 -看这里 - What? - Right here.
你不用走过来 You don't have to walk over here.
你字体那么大我从房间那头都能看见 I can read your giant font from across the room.
"杰 回家之后不要报警 "Jay, don't call the police when you come home.
家里的是我亲戚 It's my cousin.
他要跟我们住一天" He's staying with us for one day."
我看看 Let me see.
再跟我捋一遍那个佛教的胡说八道 Walk me through that Buddhist nonsense again.
有意思吧 享受着耳边风吹和清新空气 Fun, huh? Feel that wind and smell that air.
是啊 这车太颠簸了 Yeah, it's so bumpy.
那是运动化悬挂系统 我和路之间毫无阻碍 Sports suspension. Nothing between me and the road
除了我的露关节手套 except my knuckle-less gloves.
你为什么会有这玩意 Why do you even have those?
这是邓菲家族的怪癖 Oh, a quirk of the Dunphys.
我的手指怕冷 但我的指关节怕热 My fingers get cold, but my knuckles get hot.
快看啊 Check it out!
有能放八首歌的音响 我超喜欢的 There's an 8-track player. I love it.
我们来听歌吧 Let's crank something.
没听说过这支乐队 "磁头清洁带" Never heard of this band -- Head Cleaner.
里面有什么我们就听什么吧 Yeah, why don't we just listen to whatever's in there?
老天啊 Oh, my God.
-这首歌让我回到了从前 -是啊 我好爱 - Oh, this takes me back. - Yeah, I love it.
♪ 发动汽车 ♪ ♪ Get your motor goin' ♪
♪ 朝门口驰骋而去 ♪ ♪ Heading for the doorway ♪
♪ 烹煮一场冒险 ♪ ♪ Cooking an adventure ♪
♪ 然后朝门口驰骋而去 ♪ ♪ And then we make that doorway ♪
好好玩 So fun!
你笑了 你喜欢这辆车 You're smiling. You love the car.
我刚想起件事 Ah, I just remembered something.
什么事 告诉我 What? Tell me.
是我高中时的事 It's a -- It's a thing from high school.
快说嘛 大路上没有秘密 Come on. There are no secrets on the open road.
我刚想起我在这辆车上破的处 I just remembered that I lost my virginity in this car.
你说什么来着 What's that now?
我男朋友晚上偷偷把车开出来 Yeah, my boyfriend snuck the car out at night
然后 你懂的 and then, you know...
♪ 他找到了"门口" ♪ ♪ He found the doorway ♪
我的指关节热到不行了 Oh, my knuckles are overheating.
你很在意这件事 是吗 菲尔 This isn't bothering you, is it, Phil?
你也告诉过我你的第一次啊 I mean, you told me about your first time.
我是为了解释我为何讨厌蜜蜂才说的 I told you about that to explain why I hate bees so much.
我们别再讨论这事了 Let's just not talk about this anymore.
好吧 Okay.
♪ 天生狂野 ♪ ♪ Born to be wild ♪
当时播的就是这首歌 对吧 This is the song that was playing, isn't it?
是其中一首 It's one of them.
我去做午饭 你们要吃吗 I'm gonna fix lunch. Want some?
你居然要吃午饭 You're eating lunch?
是不是有什么我不知道的新网络挑战 Is there some new Internet challenge I'm not aware of?
还有 你的娃娃为什么绑了绷带 And why is your doll in bandages?
你知道我的 我小时候就很爱玩医生游戏 You know me. I always loved playing doctor.
其实我不小心开车碾过她 The truth is, I accidentally ran her over
把她胳膊扯断了 本来也没什么 and ripped her arm off, which might have been fine
但可惜那并不是我今日唯一一次要害死婴儿 if that was the only baby-mangling issue I had today.
天啊 Oh, my God!
天啊 Oh, my God.
我不是当妈的料 I'm not cut out to be a mother.
但话说回头 真正的婴儿比娃娃好照顾 对吧 Then again, a real baby is easier than a doll, right?
真正的婴儿着火了 Like, a real baby would let you know
会让大人知道 if it was on fire.
老天 你为什么在哭 Oh, God, why are you crying?
你是不是刚赢下最古怪的选美比赛 Did you just win the weirdest beauty pageant ever?
我遵守承诺了 米奇尔 180个月的玫瑰 Promises kept, Mitchell -- 180 months of roses,
以及我刚看了男孩和外星人之间的 and I just watched the most beautiful love story
最美好的爱情故事 between boy and alien.
世人为何就不能拥有孩童般的心呢 Why can't the world have the hearts of children?
我想最令我感动的部分是 You know, I think the thing that touched me the most
我们全力支持ET找到 was how we were really rooting for E.T. to find
回家的路 his way home.
你不小心发现"回家"这个巧合 I bet you were pretty thrilled
一定很激动吧 to stumble upon that coincidence.
我是不讨厌啦 I didn't hate it.
总之 我的承诺都兑现了 Anyway, I'm all caught up in the promises department.
轮到你了 Your serve.
小卡 我刚开始到地检署上班 Cam, I just started at the D.A.'s office.
短期内不能搬家 I -- I can't move anytime soon.
再说 莉莉上学怎么办 Plus, what about Lily's school?
我老家也有学校啊 They have schools in Grasshopper.
真的有吗 Do they?
-再说 莉莉在这里有很多朋友 -真的有吗 - Plus, Lily has so many friends here. - Does she?
你们在讲我吗 Did I hear my name?
你们俩八婆在瞎聊什么呢 What are you two yentas gabbing about?
我们刚在讨论 We were just talking about
搬去爷爷奶奶的农场 moving to Grandma and Grandpa's farm
就在龙卷风多发地区的中心 in -- in the heart of Tornado Alley.
天啊 小卡 你看 她都吓坏了 Oh, God. Cam -- Cam. Look, she's clearly terrified.
好吧 别担心 亲爱的 Yeah, well, don't worry, sweetie,
因为这事已经定下了 because it's already been determined.
我们这辈子都留在这里 We're staying here forever,
因为另一个爸爸要把去世的奶奶种到后院里 because other daddy is planting dead Nana in the backyard.
我不玩了 I'm out.
让其中一个孩子接收她的骨灰 Okay, it was my mother's last wish
是我妈妈的遗愿 而克莱尔不想要她 that one of us take her, and Claire doesn't want her.
你想让我怎么做 What do you want me to do?
那你想让我怎么做 Well, what do you want me to do?
那个农场已经在我家族手中百年了 The farm has been in my family for 100 years.
下一个继承人是我 你也知道我爸的 You know, I'm next in line, and you know Daddy.
他身体大不如前了 H-He's slowing down.
你妈刚给我们发了他赢得 Your mother just sent us a video of him
水上踩滚木比赛的视频 winning a log-rolling contest.
他参加的是老年组 而且第二天他累坏了 Only in his age group, and he was so spent the next day,
公鸡第一次打鸣他都没醒来 he slept through his first rooster crow
叫赖床的打鸣他也没醒 and his snooze rooster crow.
你就承认吧 你根本没打算 Just admit it -- you have no intention
遵守承诺 搬去密苏里州 of keeping your promise of moving to Missouri.
其实 你说得对 You know what? You're right.
我永远无法想象自己住在那个农场里 抱歉 I -- I can't ever imagine myself living on that farm. I'm sorry.
你说出来了 Well, there it is.
我真庆幸ET不是降落在你家里 I'm just glad E.T. didn't land at your house.
别用那种眼神看我 Okay, don't give me that look.
你以后会回密苏里州的 You'll get to go back to Missouri
等你妈从监... 公主营回来 when your mom gets released from pris-- uh, princess camp.
你口香糖嚼得很凶嘛 是不是 You're really hitting the gum pretty hard, aren't you?
我该怎么做 就这么压下去吗 How do I do this? Do I -- Do I just push down?
我不知道啊 I don't know.
不行 Nope.
我一开始不太顺利 I got off to a slow start,
但最终我找到了自己的节奏 but eventually I -- I found my rhythm.
而且 在我弄断洒水器的管子后 And -- And once I broke that sprinkler line,
漏出来的水基本帮我把坑挖好了 the -- the water did most of the digging for me.
来吧 再拉一下就行了 All right, let's go. Just one last pull.
压到脚踝了 Ah! Ah, okay, that's my ankle.
我卡住了 ‭I'm stuck.
卡尔 我要你进去... Cal, so, what I'm gonna need you to do is go insi--
卡尔 卡尔 Cal. Cal!
什么 你说什么 孩子 What? What is it, boy?
米奇尔 Mitchell?
他遇到麻烦了 H-He's in trouble?
困在洞里了 快带我去 Trapped in a hole? Show me.
-天啊 你在作弊 -我没有 - Oh, my God, you're cheating. - ‭No.
你明显在看拼图攻略啊 You're looking at ways to solve the puzzle.
那不然你怎么拼得出 你这蠢货 How'd you do it, you pea-brain?
我怎么回事 What is wrong with me?
也许约翰逊博士说得对 Maybe Dr. Johnson is right.
我真的没有住到火星上的心理素质 Maybe I don't have what it takes to live on Mars.
住手 住手 Stop! Stop.
不是你的错 It's not you.
我拼完拼图后 After I solved the puzzle,
我想让你拼不起来 I wanted to make sure you couldn't,
所以我拆了几片 so I broke a few pieces,
跟其它的粘在一起 glued some others together.
你不可能拼起来的 It can't be solved.
我都因为这破拼图做噩梦了 I've had nightmares over that puzzle!
心理治疗时还因为这个哭了 I cried about it in therapy!
不 别碰头发 发型都搞乱了 Stop! Not the hair! You're gonna fizz it.
怎么回事 松手啊 Hey, what the hell? Break it up.
卢克玩黑的 Luke's not playing fair.
是啊 你让他觉得自己很笨 Yeah, well, you make him feel dumb,
他还表现出毫不在意的样子 and he acts like it doesn't bother him,
但他真的在意 还有卢克 but it does. And, Luke,
这么耍一个焦虑的人可不像你啊 you know better than to mess with someone so uptight.
我们怎么说的来着 What do we always say?
不许玩坏艾丽克斯 她是我们的人生保障 Don't break Alex. She's our safety net.
现在 你俩都冷静点 Now, you both need to calm down.
卢克 走开冷静一下 Luke, walk it off.
糟糕 Oh, no.
露露在哪儿 Where's Lulu?
什 Wh--
娃娃吗 The doll?
谁在乎啊 Who cares?
海莉 你今天怎么回事 Haley, what's going on with you today?
你还好吗 Are you okay?
好吧 Okay, um...
别人都不知道 特别是老爸老妈 So, no one else knows, especially Mom and Dad,
你不能告诉任何人 so you can't tell anybody, but...
我怀孕了 I'm pregnant.
你怀孕了 You're pregnant?
靠 卢克 Damn it, Luke!
拜托 你们别这样看我好吗 Guys, don't look at me like that, okay?
你们肯定觉得我是不负责任的蠢货吧 You must think I'm some irresponsible idiot, don't you?
这个 有点 Um, uh, it's a -- Wow, that's --
你怀 信息量好大 You got -- That's a lot to process.
我 I...
你知道孩子爸爸是... D-Do you know who's the --
是迪兰 It's Dylan's.
这样很好啊 Oh. What a joyous --
省省吧 Oh, save it.
他其实表现得很好 He's been great, actually.
我才一团糟 你看露露 I'm the disaster. I mean, look at Lulu.
我一定会是个糟糕的母亲 I'm gonna be a horrible mother.
首先 这只是个娃娃 Okay, first, it's just a doll.
而且我们从小其实就一直受你照顾啊 And you've been taking care of us our whole lives.
对啊 记不记得以前你总帮我挑 Yeah. Remember how you used to pick out
我的开学日服装 免得我挨揍 my first day of school outfit so I wouldn't get beat up?
还有我给自己读睡前故事时 Or how you'd hold the book
你总是帮我撑着书 while I read myself a bedtime story?
你现在还是啊 And you're still doing it.
还有你刚刚跑过来 轻而易举阻止了我们打架 You just swooped in and handled our fight like a pro.
你这么善解人意 又有爱心 还霸气四射 And you're understanding and loving and a total badass.
她说得对 She's right.
你总是能够平息矛盾 You're the kind of person that can patch things up
比如 如果艾丽克斯发现 if, say, Alex ever found out
我修改了她的魔方上的贴纸 that I re-arranged the stickers on her Rubik's Cube.
你这个混... You son of a --
头发 头发 海莉救我 Aah! Hair, hair! Haley, help!
好吧 我都乐开花了 Oh. Well, I'm smiling,
我想这辆车可以留下来了 so I guess we're keeping the car.
不 你知道吗 你说得对 No, you know what? You're right.
这车不安全 只会占地儿 It's not safe, and it's just gonna take up space.
亲爱的 我说错什么 Honey, did I say something wrong?
让你不舒服了吗 Are you feeling bad?
我想说实话 Well, I-I guess if I'm being honest,
我有点担心我一坐进这车里头 I'm a-a little worried that every time I get in the car,
我就会想象你和... I'll picture you and, uh...
陶德 Todd.
-陶德 -陶德 - Todd? - ‭Todd.
以前霸凌我的人也叫陶德 Todd was the name of my bully.
感觉更真实了 It's getting realer.
要是换作是你 I mean, how would you feel
开一辆我在里面失去第一次的豪车 about driving around in the sweet ride
会是什么感觉 I lost my virginity in?
你觉得你真能找到那辆 Do you really think you can track down
文艺复兴主题市集上的牛车吗 the ox cart from the Renaissance fair?
我在牛车上只进行到二垒 I only got to second base in the ox cart.
如果你觉得不舒服 我们就把车卖掉 If it makes you uncomfortable, we can sell the car.
-真的吗 -当然 - Really? - ‭Yeah.
谢谢 Thank you.
但无论如何 But for what it's worth,
我不想留这辆车 I don't want to keep it
不是因为我在这里车震爽翻过好多次 because I had so much great sex in it.
-好多次 -不 是因为第二天发生的事 - So much? - ‭No, it's because of what happened the next day.
我老妈 My mom,
她在车座底下发现了避孕套包装袋 ugh, she found the condom wrapper under the seat,
她一定很震惊 and it must have freaked her out.
但是她没有羞辱我 But instead of shaming me
或者给我好好上一课 让我丢脸 or -- or embarrassing me with some long, awful lecture,
她非常酷 she was cool.
她只想确认我一切都好 She wanted to make sure that I was okay with everything
还有那经历也是美好的 and that it had all been a good experience.
但是 But...
这一定是她想让我留着这辆车的原因 That must be why she wanted me to have the car.
那段对话对她和我都很有意义 That talk meant as much to my mom as it did to me.
她好贴心啊 That's incredibly sweet,
如果这车真的对你那么重要 你应该留下来 and, if it means that much to you, you should keep it.
但我不知道自己会不会舒服 But I doubt I'll ever feel comfortable in it.
这个好办 We can fix that.
看样子好像不错哦 I like where this is going.
我要给你我在这里体验过的最棒的车震 I'm gonna make you the best sex I ever had in this car.
这样压力太大了 目标前三就好 That's a lot of pressure. Let's aim for top three.
歌洛莉亚 我有话要说 Gloria. I have something to say.
我的办法浪费了我一部手机 水管工也来了两次 My approach cost me a phone and a second visit from the plumber,
所以我决定尝试杰瑞的建议 so I decided to try Jerry's advice
向歌洛莉亚由衷真诚地道歉 and give Gloria a heartfelt, sincere apology.
假装谁不会啊 How hard could that be to fake?
我不该赶走你的亲戚 I was wrong to chase off your cousins.
对不起 我没有... I'm sorry that I didn't...
也考虑到你的心情 take your feelings into consideration.
你应该受到尊重 You deserve to be respected.
我当时应该说的是我爱你 What I should've said was I love you,
所以我也爱你的家庭 so I love your family.
请原谅我的无礼之举 Please forgive me for my rude behavior.
杰 我一直就只想要这个而已 Jay, this is all I ever wanted.
由你主动来对我这样 For you to come to me like this,
对我真的意义非凡 it means the world to me.
我也很对不起 I'm sorry.
我当时也应该更坦白我亲戚要来的事情 I should've been more forward about my cousin's visit.
也很对不起砸了你的手机 And I was wrong for crushing your cellphone.
你能原谅我吗 Can you ever forgive me?
或许需要点时间 但这还用说吗 Well, it may take a little while, but sure,
我当然会原谅你 I guess I can.
你知道我接下来要怎么做吗 You know what I'm going to do?
我要去你喜欢的那家肉店 I'm gonna go to that butcher shop that you like.
然后如果杰瑞不介意的话 And, if Jerry doesn't mind,
我也要给你买一块上好牛排当晚饭 I'm gonna buy you a beautiful steak for dinner.
你的家 你怎么方便怎么来 Hey, it's your house. You do what's best for you.
如果来我家 我能穿多少穿多"少" Come to my house, I'm going to be nude.
我们永远都不会去你家 杰瑞 We're never going to go to your house, Jerry.
你听到了吗 斯黛拉 Did you hear that, Stella?
我们有牛排吃啦 We're gonna have a steak.
杰瑞 你真是个天才 Jerry, you're a genius.
-简直改变人生啊 -我怎么跟你说的 - This is life-changing. - What did I tell you?
真希望我当年就开始这么做 I wish I had tried this years ago.
这样我当年跟迪迪的生活就能勉强熬过去了 This would've made my life with Dede downright tolerable.
谁知道呢 Who knows?
说不定我们还能有快乐人生 Maybe we even could've been happy.
很庆幸你能这么想 I'm glad you think so.
但这话跟我说不合适吧 But I'm not the one you need to tell.
迪迪 是我 杰 就想跟你问声好 Hey, Dede, it's me, Jay. Just wondering how you're doing.
爸 Dad?
我们这里是周六 Uh, it's Saturday here.
你又不是在语音留言 You're not leaving a voicemail.
用心交流 From the heart.
我想跟你说的是 What I wanted to say is
在我们的感情中 我有很多事可以做得更好 I could've handled a lot of things better in our relationship.
我想我当年不是什么好伴侣 I guess I wasn't a very good partner.
常常惹你 I dug in a lot.
也从没站在你的角度想事情 I never thought of things from your point of view.
可能我总是只想到满足自己 I guess I always needed to get my own way.
总之 你是个好女人 Anyway, you were a good woman,
我们也有过一些欢乐时光 and we had some fun times,
尤其是床上 especially in the sack.
"床事"从未有过问题 Never had a problem there.
谨言慎行 你是在跟我的老婆说话 Careful. That's my wife you're talking to.
-抱歉 杰瑞 - 好啦 - Oh, sorry, Jerr, yeah. - ‭Okay.
我希望你能够成长为一棵健壮大树 I hope you grow up into a nice, big tree,
也希望你不会染上虫害 a-and I hope you don't get any of those beetles
会弄死植物的那种 that are killing everything.
等以后你在这落地生根了 And when you settle in in a little while,
或许我会带乔来爬你 maybe I'll bring Joe over and he can climb you.
阿门 Mm. ‭Amen.
你说完了吗 You done?
应该吧 Yeah, I think so.
不介意我说两句吧 Mind if I say a word?
把她交给你了 She's all yours.
杰是个大气男人 Jay was a big man.
他跟他的老婆道歉了 He apologized to his wife.
你知道她怎么做了吗 And do you know what she did?
她也道歉回去了 She apologized back!
你有跟我道歉过一次吗 Did you ever do that even once?!
我跟你道歉过上千次吧 I apologized to you a thousand times,
而你只让我自己憋着火 and you let me just eat it.
我受够跟你说你永远都是对的了 Well, I'm tired of telling you you're always right,
因为你猜怎么着 'cause guess what?
那只海豚压根就认不得你 That dolphin did not recognize you.
你的俳句有太多音节了 Your haikus had too many syllables.
还有相信我 素食者也需要用止汗除臭剂 And trust me, vegans do need deodorant!
好啦 走吧 All right. Come on.
来吧 小家伙 让哥请你吃上好牛排 Come on, kid. Let me buy you a nice steak.
好 Yeah.
来 给 Hey. Here.
我想你吃点东西 I-I want you to eat something.
小心 Be careful.
谢谢你对我这么无微不至 Thank you for taking such good care of me,
哪怕你心里不高兴 even when you're mad.
没 天啊 我没有不高兴 No. My gosh, I am not mad.
我也不该逼你的 And I shouldn't have pushed.
对不起 但如果我们今天学到一件事 I-I'm sorry, but, you know, if we learn one thing today,
那就是你不可能在农村里活下来 it's that you couldn't survive on a farm.
我会没事的 I'll be fine,
-因为我会有你的陪伴 -什么 - because I'll be with you. - What?
我想... 当我用你的角度看这事 I guess w-when I look at things from your point of view,
我的确做出了承诺 I -- I made a promise.
如果你爸爸真的需要你接手一切 When your dad needs you to take over the farm,
我愿意加入 I'm in.
米奇尔 你这话对我意义重大 Mitchell, that means so much to me,
你也会喜欢那一切的 and you're gonna love it.
清新空气 也没有恼人车潮 The fresh air, and there's no traffic.
等镇上有你这第二个律师 Oh, and with a second lawyer in town,
我们就能重开法院了 we could reopen the courthouse.
你给羊挤过奶吗 H-Have you ever milked a goat?
你有试过从牛奶罐直接喝刚挤的牛奶吗 Have you ever had fresh milk right from the spigot?
好喝到不行 Oh, unbelievable.
但你也得小心蛇虫鼠蚁 You do have to be careful of snakes and mice and rats.
那里有巨多田鼠 There's a ton of field mice.
我很怕 小时候有一只沿着我的袖子爬上来了 They scare me. One ran up my sleeve one time when I was a kid.
这车比我印象中小 可能我没那么灵活了 This car is smaller than I remember. I think I'm just less flexible?
我大腿好像抽筋了 I think I threw out my lap.
我们刚才... 只是在清理车库 We were um... just cleaning out the garage.
少来 我们全听到了 Nice try, we heard everything.
不过在快"结束"的时候 Although around the finish line,
我们有点不确定哪个声音是谁了 we kind of lose track of who's who.
真不敢相信妈又抓到你在车上做爱 I can't believe Mom caught you having sex in the car again.
你叫那棵树妈吗 You are calling the tree Mom?
行吧 Okay.
听我说 在经过一番讨论后 So listen, after some reflextion,
我们觉得她在你这里会比较好 we decided that she might be be off here.
在你拒绝之前... Before you say no.
我也想要这样 I would actually like that.
车库里的叫声是怎么回事 Hey! What was those screeching in the garage?
浣熊又回来了嘛 Are the raccoons back?
靠 Damn it!