翻译: Cecilia 馒天锅海 pendz
校对: 濑成一
我叫Nathan Fielder My name is Nathan Fielder,
后期: 满甲雪
毕业于加拿大最顶尖的商学院之一 and I graduated from one of Canada's top business schools
学业成绩单
并且成绩优异 with really good grades.
压制: 肉包
如今 我运用我的学识 Now I'm using my knowledge
来帮助挣扎求生的小型企业主 to help struggling small business owners
在这个竞争激烈的世界里获得成功 make it in this competitive world.
总监: pendz
改造前
改造后
面包和糕点
改造前
改造后
面包糕点
这 This...
救援 高手
电波诚译
第一季 第五集
就是救援高手 is Nathan for you.
没有什么比受到惊吓更受人们喜爱了 There's nothing people like more than being scared.
- 是的 我喜欢我的 - 啊哈 - Well, yeah, I like my-- - Woah!
我的天啊 Oh, my god.
这就是为什么十月到来之际 That's why, when October swings around,
鬼屋往往生意兴隆 haunted houses are big business.
Bruce Stanton是恐怖统治的店主 Bruce Stanton is the owner of Reign of Terror,
一家加州千橡市年度开放的鬼屋 an annual haunted house in Thousand Oaks, California.
我们精心设计的场景保证能让你大吃一惊 We have a perfect environment to set you up to be scared.
恐怖统治店主
但我体验了一下这个本该很恐怖的鬼屋 But after taking a walk-through of the supposedly scary mansion,
出来后却觉得没那么惊艳 I came out less than impressed.
你好 Hi.
因此我和Bruce单独会面 提出了我的想法 So I talked to bruce one on one about an idea I had
帮他把生意做得更好 to help his business.
什么样的新闻对鬼屋最有利呢 What is the best press a haunted house can get?
有人被吓到尿裤子 That it's so scary, someone peed their pants.
不是 No.
吓尿只是一方面 Pee is one thing.
我想让你的鬼屋如此吓人 I want your haunted house to be so scary
以至于有人会因为太吓人而起诉你 that someone sues you for being too scary.
我可不太想让别人起诉我们 I don't know that we want people to sue us.
如果恐怖统治因为太吓人而被起诉 If the Reign of Terror was sued for being too scary,
鬼屋被起诉 称"太过恐怖"
这样的新闻会吸引全世界寻求刺激的人 that news would attract thrill-seekers from around the world.
恐怖统治
计划:
我的计划是 The plan,
让顾客以为自己真的会死而愤然起诉 get customers to sue by making them think that they're really going to die.
制造濒死体验
不行 因为我觉得那样就太过分了 No, because I think that will be going too far.
好吧 你现在的运营方式也可以吸引媒体的注意 Well, your current approach could get press too.
是啊 Yes.
因为你们是世界上最不恐怖的鬼屋 By being the world's least scary haunted house.
呃 我不觉得那是我们想要的运营方式 但是 Uh, I don't think that's the approach we want, but--
好吧 但看上去这就是你现在的运营方式啊 Well, that's the approach it seems like you're currently taking.
不 我们鬼屋非常吓人 No, we are a scary--
"恐怖统治 胆小鬼们放松的地方" "Reign of terror. Where pussies go to relax."
哦 好吧 Oh, Okay.
还是 "恐怖统治 你可能会死掉哦" Or, "Reign of terror, you're probably going to die."
你是说 在鬼屋里挂上一张画告诉他们死亡 You mean in the haunted house, we paint a picture that their death is...
即将来临 imminent.
- 是的 - 好吧 - Yes. - Okay.
为了使鬼屋吓人到足够被起诉 To scare people enough that they would sue,
我告诉Bruce我们需要说服游客 I explained to Bruce that we needed to convince customers
让他们以为自己染上了一种可能会致死的疾病 they somehow contracted a disease they're likely to die from.
Bruce很不情愿地同意让我试一天 Bruce reluctantly agreed to let me try it out for a day.
经过一周后 我的演员们都已准备就绪 And after a week of preparation, my actors were ready.
是时候让人们体验世界上最恐怖的鬼屋了 It was time for people to enter the world's scariest haunted house.
恐怖统治 鬼屋 入口
欢迎来到恐怖统治 Well, thanks for coming to the Reign of Terror.
- 我们很兴奋 老兄 - 你很兴奋吗 - Oh, we're excited, man. - You're excited?
是啊 Yeah, man.
在你们进入之前 我必须要警告你们 I have to warn you before you go in.
卧槽 Oh, dang.
这个鬼屋极其吓人 This haunted house is extremely scary.
- 我就喜欢这种 - 你肯定吗 - I like the sound of that. - Are you sure?
当然了 Yeah.
- 好的 欢迎进入恐怖统治 - 你先 - All right, welcome to the Reign of Terror. - You first.
啊 Ooh...
- 妈咪 - 妈了个鸡 - Mommy. - Hells....
你是我妈妈 You're my mommy.
啊啊啊 Aah!
不好意思 等一下 什么 谁 Sorry, one sec. What? Who?
- 谁 她吗 - 是的 - Who? Her? - Yeah.
不好意思 你们可以到我这来一下吗 Sorry, can you come with me for a sec?
不好意思 各位 Sorry, guys.
- 你们在里面被吓到了吗 - 是啊 - Were you guys scared in there? - Yeah.
那个不好意思 她有无意中碰到你吗 So sorry, did she touch you by any chance?
或者有什么 Or was there a--
呃 我觉得她可能碰到我的脖子了 Um, I think she probably touched my neck.
妈咪 Mommy!
通常我都会戴眼镜的 Like, I usually wear my glasses
但这次我没戴 我的手伸过头了 and this time I didn't, and I overshot the grab
我不应该碰到你的 and I was supposed to not touch you.
- 等一下 抱歉 就 - 不好意思 - Wait, sorry, just-- - Sorry.
你们可以在这儿等一会吗 Can you guys wait in here one sec?
- 好的 - 不好意思 就一会 - Yeah. - Sorry, one second.
- 这种病叫什么 - 叫做克莱因病 - What is it called? - It's called Klein's disease.
- 这是一种免疫 - 克莱因病吗 - And it's an immunity-- - Klein’s disease?
- 克莱因病 - 有什么问题吗 - Klein's disease. - So what's the problem?
她有一种自身免疫性疾病 She has an auto-immune thing.
她担心她碰到你的时候 She worried when she touched you,
把什么病菌传染给你了 she transmitted something to you.
不要感到惊慌或者什么 So don't get freaked out or anything,
但我叫了辆救护车 but I called an ambulance.
医护人员马上会来确认 Paramedics are just coming to make sure.
他们给你做个检查 只是预防性的 They'll look at you, it's just precautionary.
在这儿等一会就行 非常感谢 So just hold tight. Thank you so much.
没问题 No problem.
希望你们刚才在鬼屋玩的尽兴 I hope you had a good time in the haunted house.
- 抱歉 - 没事 - Sorry about this. - It's all good.
说真的 她碰到我我都没多想
因为我以为只是个意外 但
我不知道她得了这样一种
疾病或是什么
可是为什么他们还让她在这儿工作呢
老天
这没道理啊
我也不知道 是因为美国残疾人法案吗
这太疯狂了
- 你们好 嘿 - 我们要去哪 - Hey, guys. Hey. - Where are we going?
就在这里面 Uh, just in here.
你身上有没有什么伤口 Do you have any cuts or anything like that?
我想没有吧 我不怎么检查我后背 I don't think so. I don't look back there a lot.
呃 你没有吗 Um... you do not?
好的 你介意我 Okay, do you mind if I just--
我们绝对要给她做个检查 如果真的 We should definitely get her checked out, if that's--
- 是的 - 怎么检查 - Yeah. - "Checked out" in what way?
肯定要在医院里让医生检查一下 Like, at a hospital with a doctor for sure,
看看有没有染上克莱因病 for Klein's.
据我所知 这种病非常的严重 To my knowledge, it's a disease that's pretty serious.
基本上 如果你皮肤上有破损 并且被碰到了 Basically, if you've got a cut, and you're touched,
或者你身上有类似伤口的地方 and you have any sort of open wound or anything that,
你懂的 就连眼睛啊 嘴巴啊 You know, touched an orifice-- your eye, your mouth,
或者其他暴露在外的器官 or anything that's open or anything like that.
- 天哪 - 是啊 - Jeez. - Yeah.
它能被传染 所以 It can be contracted, so--
这病像艾滋病吗 还是 更糟糕 Is this, like, aids? Is it, like--worse?
这确实是一种免疫缺陷疾病 Well, it is an immune deficiency disease.
你们说什么仅次于艾滋病啥的
那可不是开玩笑的
嘿 Dave
我们要从东门进了 他们让我们别从西门进
- 好吧 - 那是什么意思 - Okay. - What's that mean?
我从来没去过东门 所以
我们一般都直接往救护车通道那去 所以
我也不知道
哦天 搞什么 Oh hell not.
感觉怎么样 How are we doing?
我不知道 我们应该感到怎样
现在只是防御性措施 At this time it's a precautionary measure.
仅此而已 That's all it is.
现在还是初期 我们就在这给你做个检查 好吗 It's a first stage, we're gonna have you checked out right here, okay?
- 你是医生吗 - 是的 - Are you a doctor? - Yeah.
- 你是医生吗 - 没错 我是个医生 - Are you a doctor? - I am a doctor, yes.
我需要她跟我出来 I need her to come outside with me,
然后我们可以继续下一阶段 那时会有更多医生 and we're gonna move on to another stage where there's more doctors.
你为什么要穿防护服 很严重吗 Why are you wearing this suit? Is it serious?
这是为了我的 是的先生 是很严重 拜托了 It's for my--yes, sir, it is serious, please.
不 到底发生了什么 No! What is going on?
- 我们都患上了啊 - 她需要先出来 - We all have this! - She needs to come first.
如果他穿着这个 就意味着我们都被传染了 If he's wearing this, we all have it.
- 我能理解 - 这到底是什么东西 - I understand that. - What is this thing?
先生 这是为了确保我的安全 Sir-- it's for my safety.
为什么我们没有防护服 Why don't we have what he has?
不 为什么他穿着生化服 No! Why does he have a biohazard suit?
不 等下 等下 等下 No, wait. Hold on, hold on.
- 不 不 不 - 等下 等下 - No, no, no. - Hold on, hold on.
她哪都不会去 如果你不解释清楚的话 She's not going nowhere 'till you explain, man,
到底发生了什么 哥们 what's going on, man.
- 是啊 - 发生了什么 - Yeah! - What's going on?
她哪都不会去的 She's not going nowhere.
看 她也摸我了
我们先出去再说吧 We're gonna walk right outside.
我也被传染了
- 我们先出去吧 - 好的 - Let's walk right outside. - Okay.
我只想要个解释 这是我唯一的请求 I just want an explanation, that's all I'm asking for.
鬼屋出口
好嘞 All right.
希望你们喜欢这个鬼屋 Hope you guys enjoyed the haunted house.
你们喜欢这次体验吗 You guys enjoy it in there?
- 很与众不同 - 哇哦 - That was different. - Wow.
- 与众不同吗 - 这我可没想到 - That was different? - I was not expecting that.
- 这位是一名律师 - 你好 - This right here is a lawyer. - Hello.
- Peter - 我是Peter - Peter-- - Peter.
- Peter Marx - 我叫Mo - Peter Marx. - Mo.
- Mo 你呢 - 我是Mira - Mo. And you are? - I'm Mira.
Mira Mira.
如果你觉得这个鬼屋太吓人了 So if you found the haunted house too scary,
想付诸法律手段起诉鬼屋的话 and you want to press any legal action against the haunted house,
他可以和你们谈谈 he can talk to you--
我们能谈一谈 从法律上来说 We can talk and see-- under the law,
你们可以以故意精神伤害的罪名进行起诉 you have claims for what we call "Intentional infliction of emotional distress".
律师
甚至是过失精神伤害 Or even "Negligent infliction of emotional distress."
我并不是想制造不存在的麻烦 I don't want to create problems that don't exist,
但是如果你们有这样的顾虑 请一定来找我 but if you have those concerns, feel free to call me.
但这不是强制的 But you don't have to,
前提是你们要有这个意向 it's only if you're comfortable about it.
在几组游客体验了我这个版本的鬼屋之后 After running several more customers through my version of the haunted house--
妈 是我 Jordan Hey, mom, it's Jordan.
呃 我需要去趟医院 Um, actually I have to go to the hospital.
这里有个身染疾病的人 There was somebody with a disease.
听好 我不是想让你们起诉打官司 Now, I'm not trying to create a lawsuit here,
我只想说 根据加州法律你们享有某些权利 I just--you have certain rights under california law.
我拜访了Bruce来跟进情况 I paid Bruce a visit to follow up.
你觉得怎么样 What did you think?
这个 我觉得对一个鬼屋来说太不切实际了 Well, I think it's completely impractical for a haunted house.
但人们都被吓到了啊 But people were scared.
大概吧 我反正看不出来 Yeah, I don't know, I couldn't tell.
出口处有一个我们请的律师 他觉得 We had a lawyer there at the exit that thinks,
你懂的 有些人有提起诉讼的可能性 you know, some people might have a case.
Peter 你要进来吗 Peter? Do you wanna come in?
- 你好 - 嗨 这位是Bruce - Hello. - Hi, this is Bruce.
- 我是Peter - 这个鬼屋是他在经营 - Peter. - He runs the haunted house.
幸会幸会 Nice to meet you.
所以有些人可能会打官司 是吧 So some of these people have a case, right?
呃 他们中一些人是有点吓到了 Well, some of them were a little apprehensive
我也不想让你陷入太多麻烦 and I'm not trying to get you in a lot of trouble--
但你想要起诉 But you want to sue.
诉求完全合法的话 我当然会起诉 I want to sue for legitimate claims, absolutely.
那这算合法诉求吧 And this is a legitimate claim?
呃 可以是啊 这个 再看吧 Well, it could be. And, uh, we'll see.
- 那好吧 - 好吧 非常感谢 - All right. - All right, thanks so much.
客气了 All right.
呃 很高兴我 嗯 帮你做了这件事 Well, I'm glad I-- you know, could have helped and done this for you.
接管了一家很棒的鬼屋 但 Took a good haunted house and...
并没让它变得更棒 Not made it any better.
好吧 我是在试着让你出名 Well, I'm trying to get you press.
好吧 Okay.
最后我才发现 这个鬼屋里最恐怖的事情 In the end, the scariest thing about the haunted house
竟然是Bruce的乖张行径 was Bruce's terrible manners.
但是当有人对你无礼的时候 不要往心里去 But when someone's rude to you, you can't take it personally.
你只须继续前行 You just have to keep going.
当你看我的时候 你可能看见了一个完美的男人 When you look at me, you probably see a guy who has it all.
但实际上 我身上还是有很多青涩稚气的地方 But really, there's a large part of me that's immature and under-developed.
特别是涉及到女人的时候 Especially when it comes to women.
从小到大我每一个喜欢的女孩都拒绝了我 Every girl I liked growing up rejected me.
由于这个原因 And because of that,
我成为了一个有女人在旁边就习惯性紧张的男人 I've grown into a man who's chronically nervous around women.
我是个感情上的侏儒 I'm an emotional midget.
如果有人带着这个问题来找我 Now, if someone came to me with this problem,
我会建议沉浸疗法 I'd suggest immersion therapy,
也就是把自己沉浸在恐惧中来克服恐惧 where you overwhelm yourself with your fear in order to overcome it.
所以今晚 为了给你们做示范 So tonight, to inspire you,
我会尝试通过同时约会十个女人 而不是一个哦 I'm going to attempt to overcome my fear of the opposite sex
来克服自己对异性的恐惧 by dating not one, but ten women at the same time.
祝我好运吧 Wish me luck.
Absolutely制片公司 洛杉矶 加州
我需要找到十个同意跟我约会的女人 I needed to get ten women to agree to date me,
所以我觉得找同事帮忙可能会简单一些 so I thought it would be easy to start with someone I work with.
那个 So...
你知道我会在节目上做个试验 You know how I'm doing the thing on the show
就我要同时约会 呃 十位女性那事 where I'm dating, like, ten women at the same time?
知道 Yeah.
那你现在有对象吗 Are you in a relationship right now?
- 有 - 好吧 - Yes. - Okay.
抱歉啦 当我没问过 我真是蠢翻了 So--sorry, never mind. I was stupid to ask.
结果并不成功 根据我以往的经验来看 It didn't work, and I knew from experience
没有理由的话 女人们是不会停下来跟我说话的 that women just wouldn't stop and talk to me without an excuse.
所以我就找了个理由 So I found one.
打扰一下 来尝尝我们新推出的蓝莓覆盆子奶昔吧 Excuse me, would you like to try our new blueberry-raspberry smoothie?
不用了 谢谢
试试吧 就尝一个 Come on, just one?
想尝尝我们新推出的蓝莓覆盆子奶昔吗 Would you like to try one of our new Raspberry-blueberry smoothies?
好啊 谢了
其实我是在开玩笑 I'm just kidding, actually.
我并不在这工作 我叫Nathan I don't work here. My name's Nathan.
很高兴见到你
我这么做是为了好开个场 I'm just doing this as a way to break the ice
顺便表现一下我的性格 and show my personality.
我只是想多认识些人 然后 I'm just trying to meet people and--
你真的不在这里工作吗
不 No.
哦 好吧
嘿 你能别免费发放奶昔了吗
我只是在喝我自己在这买的奶昔 I'm just drinking my own smoothie that I bought from here.
看起来可不是这么一回事
但我喜欢用托盘上的小杯子喝奶昔啊 But I like drinking my smoothie out of little cups on a tray.
我就喜欢这么喝奶昔 That's how I like to drink my smoothie.
你得挪到那边去
或者到街对面去
是吗 我认为只要我想 我可以在任何地方喝奶昔 Okay, well I think I'm allowed to drink my smoothie wherever I want.
你得挪一边去 You need to move this.
- 嘿 - 你得挪一边去 - Hey! - You need to move this.
别碰我的托盘 你疯啦 You cannot touch my tray, that is crazy.
奶昔这招本来就有点太故弄玄虚 The smoothie thing was too gimmicky anyways,
用可爱小狗的时候我也有这种感觉 and it felt the same way when I used a cute dog.
- 喜欢我的小狗吗 - 喜欢 - Do you like my dog? - Yeah.
- 打个招呼 - 嗨 - Say hi. - Hi.
但正当准备放弃的时候 But just when I was ready to quit,
我灵光一现 it hit me.
我完全忽略了我手头有着吸引女孩子的绝佳优势 I had a major girl magnet at my disposal that I was totally ignoring.
这些摄影机干嘛用的
一个电视摄制组 A television crew.
这个主意很疯狂 It was a crazy idea,
但可能有女人会为了上电视的机会而跟我约会 but maybe women would date me just for the opportunity to be on tv.
这就是我的解决办法 I had my solution.
我要制作一个假的真人秀 I was going to create a fake reality show
在节目里 十个女人要争夺一个男人的真心 in which ten women would vie for the heart of one man.
也就是我 Me.
节目的名字叫 猛男狠狠爱 It would be called the hunk.
我们花了数周时间准备 It took weeks to prepare
从回复我线上广告申请参加的难以数计的女性中进行甄选 as we sorted through the countless submissions from women to my online ad.
哦 我喜欢她 Oh, I like her.
但很快我们就选出了我需要的十位女性 But pretty soon we selected the ten women I would need,
雇了个主持人 还租了一所豪宅 hired a host, and rented a mansion.
没人知道节目是假的 连主持人都不知道 No one knew my show was fake, not even the host.
而节目即将开始 And it was about to begin.
我是Anthony Napoli I'm Anthony Napoli.
今晚 十位女士将聚集一堂 Tonight, ten women will gather in this house
来争夺一个男人的真心 to vie for the heart of one man.
他们会找到真爱吗 会找到灵魂伴侣吗 Will they find love? Will they find their soul mate?
我是Anthony Napoli 您正在收看的是猛男狠狠爱 I'm Anthony Napoli. This is the hunk.
猛男狠狠爱
制作人 Nathan Fielder
主持人
- 嗨 - 你准备好了吗 Nathan - Hi. - You ready, Nathan?
呃 好了 我觉得没问题了 Uh, yeah. Yeah, I think so.
- 有点小紧张是吧 - 嗯 是有点 - A little bit nervous? - Um, kinda, yeah.
好了 是时候跟女士们见面了 Well, it's time to meet the women.
接 接下来你要怎么做 Where--what are you gonna do?
我会站在这里 然后把你介绍给全体女士 I'm gonna stand here, and I'm gonna introduce you to all the women.
这个过程你能不能 呃 到里面去 Could you maybe, um, be inside for that?
- 我必须 - 因为跟我比起来你特别帅 - I'll have-- - Just because you're very handsome compared to me.
- 我理解 Nathan - 你能去里面吗 - I understand that, Nathan-- - Could you be inside?
我必须得在这儿 I'll have to be here.
如果你站在我旁边 If you're next to me,
他们会爱上你而不是 they're gonna love you more than--
Nathan 你是猛男嘉宾 我是主持人 Nathan, you're the hunk, I'm the host.
- 你一定很有女人缘 对吧 - 这个嘛 - Women must love you, right? - Eh...
- 是吧 - 我想是吧 - Yes? - I guess they do.
你睡过多少女人 How many women have you slept with?
呃 Eh...
也没那么多 Not that many.
- 你玩过3P吗 - 嗯 玩过 - Have you ever had a threesome? - I have, yes.
好吧 所以 你还是进去吧 Okay, so--yeah, go inside, please.
你 你是想让我进去吗 Would you--you would like me to step inside?
没错 你绝对不能在这儿 Yeah. You can't be out here at all.
- 那好吧 也行 - 对 那你能进去吗 - No, that's all right. - Okay, can you go inside?
- 当然 - 好的 谢啦 - Sure. - Okay. Thank you.
当我意识到雇佣帅气主持人是个坏主意的时候已经太迟了 I realized too late that hiring a handsome host was a bad idea.
但哪怕Tony已经在房子里了 那些女士们到来的时候 But even with Tony in the house, when the women arrived,
我还是超级紧张 I got super-nervous.
嗨 我是Emily 很高兴见到你 Hi, I'm Emily. Nice to meet you.
噢 我是Nathan 很高兴见到你 Oh, Nathan. Nice to meet you.
- 很高兴见到你 - 是啊 - Nice to meet you. - Yeah.
Emily 22岁 托莱多 俄亥俄州
- 超兴奋的 - 是啊 可不是吗 - So exciting. - Yeah. It is, huh?
- 嗯 - 嗯 - Yeah. - Yeah.
多好玩啊 This is fun.
是啊 Yeah.
- 是啊 - 棒呆了 呃 - Yeah. - Totally, um...
见到你真的很高兴 It was so nice to meet you.
- 是嘛 好吧 - 谢谢 - Yeah, okay. - Thanks.
嗯 你要进去么 咱们一会儿可以多聊聊 Um, do you want to go-- we could talk more after.
- 当然行啊 - 好吧 那就 - Yeah, sure. - Yeah, just--
- 可以 没问题 - 第一次见面 就先打个招呼吧 - All right, cool. - For the first bit, just saying hi.
好的 Yeah.
虽然在一开始我很紧张 Even though I was nervous at first--
我喜欢一身帅气西装的男人 I love a man in a good suit.
- 噢 是嘛 - 嗯哼 - Oh, okay. - Mm-hm.
真会说话 That's nice.
但当我见了一个又一个女人后 As I met more and more of the women,
我发现自己自信渐长 I found my confidence growing.
我们里面还有些点心之类的东西 We have snacks inside and stuff, too.
- 我们吃得相当好 - 好棒哦 - We eat pretty good. - Awesome.
这一切都太酷了 因为很像<单身汉>那档节目 This was all so cool, 'cause it was just like the bachelor.
我真的很喜欢头发黑皮肤白的男人 I really like guys who have black hair and white skin.
- 就好像 我的 - 那你不喜欢 呃 - It's, like, my-- - You don't like, uh--
- 金发吗 - 不喜欢黑人吗 还是 - Blonds? - Like black guys, or--
呃 我只是 Um, I just--
- 那我们进去再聊吧 - 好的 - Well, we'll talk more inside. - Okay.
我这辈子从没这么引人注目过 I had never had this much attention in my life,
为了吸引他们 我唯一需要做的 and the only thing I had to do to attract them
就是创造一档假节目 was to create a fake show.
虽然我不太理解这个逻辑 The logic didn't really make sense to me,
但是这方法还挺管用 but it was working,
而我打算利用这个机会 And I was gonna take advantage of this
试着让自己和女人交流时不再紧张 to try to get over my nervousness around women.
女士们 Ladies...
我是你们的主持人 Anthony Napoli I'm your host, Anthony Napoli.
主持人
现在你们可以互相交流 Now is your chance to mingle
并认识一下今晚的猛男嘉宾 Nathan and get to know your hunk, Nathan.
你要不上那边去 Are you gonna go up there?
你想到哪儿去 Where you gonna be?
- 你又想要我离开吗 - 对 - You want me to leave again? - Yeah.
- 也许进房间去 - 你在开玩笑呢 是吧 - Maybe go into the room? - You're kidding me, right?
没 No.
你要我再次离开吗 You want me to leave the room again?
- 是啊 - 上那去吗 - Yeah. - Up here?
- 没错 - 行吧 - Sure. - All right.
好啦 All right.
让我们开始狂欢吧 怎么样 Let's get this party started, huh?
- 好耶 噢 - 噢 - Yes! Oh! - Ohh.
噢 Ohh...
你们觉得主持人怎么样 What did you guys think of the host?
他之前说他玩过3P 他说的 He was saying he had a threesome--he was saying.
- 什么 - 没错 - What? - Yeah.
- 真的吗 - 是啊 和两个男的 - Really? - Yeah, with two guys.
- 和两个男的吗 - 嗯 - With two guys? - Yeah.
我说 "好吧 感谢你的分享" I'm, like, "Okay, thanks for telling me that."
"但我并不想知道" "I don't really want to know."
是吧 Yeah.
- 这也 - 太奇怪了 - I mean-- - So weird.
我很享受和这些女人约会 I was having fun dating all the women,
但是我发现很难知道他们是真喜欢我 but I began to find it hard to tell if they really liked me,
还是因为其他原因而参与节目 or had other motivations for being here.
嗯 我最近在做我的专辑 Well, I'm working on my album right now.
Lauren Ashley 26岁 亚特兰大 佐治亚州
- 我的基督音乐专辑 - 好吧 - My Christian music album. - Okay.
- 是的 - 能给我唱一首吗 还是 - Yeah. - Can I hear a song or...
*人们假装仿佛* *People make it seem*
*每个人都可以* *that everyone is cool*
*忍受孤独* *with being alone*
我的专辑将会在今年发行 所以 My album is coming out this year, so...
我名字缩写是LA My name is L.A.
所以我的专辑名就是 My album is gonna be called L.A.X.,
将会在今年发行 and it's gonna be coming out this year.
我的推特账号是la My twitter is la--
于是我很快意识到 And I was soon reminded that
这些女生大部分只是想上电视 most of these girls were just here to be on TV.
所以我竭尽所能地想问出 So I tried my best to find out
这些女人对我的真实看法 how these women truly felt about me.
你喜欢我吗 Do you like me?
- 当然 - 呃 你爱我吗 - Yeah. - Um, do you love me?
天哪 我不能 那太 Oh, god! I can't--that's such--
Zoya 26岁 明斯克 白俄罗斯
我们才刚见面怎么能说 How can I tell the first--
呃 要说爱的话 我当然得先了解对方 Uh, love, I need to learn the person first, of course.
没错 Yeah.
我不希望这么早就淘汰你 I mean, I'd hate to eliminate you so soon.
- 所以也许我该再问一次 - 噢 我爱你吗 - So maybe I should ask again. - Oh, do I love you?
- 是的 - 我爱你 - Yeah. - I love you.
- 你是爱我的吗 - 是啊 - But you do? - I do.
我挺喜欢他的 他人真的很好 I like him. He's a really nice person.
但 是啊 我爱他 所以 But, yeah, I love him, so...
但夜色渐暗 我发现她们来这的原因无关紧要 But as the night went on, I realized it didn't matter why they were here.
我们都得到了想要的东西 We were both getting what we wanted.
我克服了自己在女人身边容易紧张的毛病 I got to work through my nervousness around women--
- 抱歉 我有点抖 - 不用紧张 - Sorry, I'm kind of shaking. - Don't be nervous.
别紧张 你真可爱 Don't be nervous, that's so cute.
而她们能上电视 --and they got to be on TV.
我很高兴给大家介绍健康还原水 I would love to have everyone introduced to Kangen Water.
这种水是市面上最好的饮用水 This water is one of the best waters out there.
它的PH值是9.5 It has a PH of 9.5.
我一直都不擅长调情 I'd never been that good of a flirt,
但是我有机会和那么多美女一起练习 but I had the opportunity to practice with so many beautiful girls.
你的眼睛和嘴唇很漂亮 You have beautiful eyes and beautiful lips,
Rachel 23岁 底特律 密歇根州
头发也好看 你的风格很 and lovely hair, and your style is...
很棒 wonderful.
噢 谢谢夸奖 Nate Oh... Thanks, Nate.
那么 告诉我你最不为人知的秘密 So tell me your deepest, darkest secret.
我最不为人知的秘密是 My deepest, darkest secret is...
我不喜欢穿袜子 I don't like wearing socks.
真棒 That's great.
但随着夜晚的进行 But as the night progressed...
噢 不赖嘛 Oh, cool.
魔术 Magic.
我的调情能力得到了显著提升 my flirting skills drastically improved.
你骑摩托车吗 我是说 Do you ride motorcycles? I mean--
我不骑摩托车 但我算是个坏男孩 I don't ride a motorcycle, but I am a bit of a bad boy.
但我绝对无法预料到接下来发生的事情 But what happened next I would have never expected.
我喜欢摩托车 你骑摩托车吗 I like motorcycles, actually. Do you ride motorcycles?
Lais 32岁 圣保罗 巴西
我不骑摩托车 但我算是个坏男孩 I don't ride a motorcycle, but I am a bit of a bad boy.
噢 好吧 Oh, okay.
这可能有点 我们才聊了几分钟而已 That might be just-- I mean, we've only been talking for a few minutes.
这样的进展对我而言有点太快了 We might be moving just a little bit fast for me.
我只是希望能够慢慢来 I just prefer to take things a little slower.
嗯 不行 Mm, no.
还是太快了 It's still too soon.
我们得慢慢来 我们才刚见面 We need to take things slow. We just met.
没关系的 It's okay.
那一瞬间 我恍然大悟 In that moment, everything changed.
虽然我没准备好进展如此迅速 I wasn't ready to move as quick as she was,
但我终于知道被女人主动追求是什么感觉了 but I finally knew what it was like to have a woman come to me.
我发现我不用费尽心思让女人喜欢我 I realized I didn't have to do crazy stunts to get women to like me,
我只需要做自己 I just had to be myself...
呆在这个一晚租金五千刀的别墅里 inside a $5,000-per-night mansion
外加一个电视摄制组拍摄我 with a TV crew filming me.
但是像我这种人 一辈子都在被拒绝 But for a guy like me, who's gone through an entire lifetime of rejection,
我只需要知道自己也有受欢迎的一面 knowing that I was desirable was all I needed
就再也不会在女人身边紧张了 to no longer be nervous around women.
我完成了我的目标 I had accomplished my goal.
所以我把所有女士叫过来告诉她们 So I gathered all the women to tell them
节目结束了 that the show was over.
我已经完成了目标 I have accomplished my goal,
这意味着不幸的是 已经没有理由 and that means unfortunately, there's no longer a reason
让这个节目<猛男狠狠爱>继续下去了 for this show, The Hunk, to continue.
你认真的吗 Are you serious?
我有问题 所以你真的 你真的 Question. So you really-- you really--
呃 你得到你 Um, did you get your--
你 你和这些女生约会后得到你想要的了吗 You got-- you got what you wanted from dating all the girls?
你克服了恐惧吗 You got your fear met?
呃 我觉得 我觉得这帮助我克服了它 Um, I think-- I think it helped me overcome it, yes.
怎么了 Why?
我只是好奇而已 I'm just wondering.
但是其他人都为我感到高兴 But others were happy for me.
你做得很棒
- 谢谢你 - 没事 - Thank you. - Yeah.
我完成了我原本打算做的事 I had accomplished what I set out to do,
但还有一件事我需要纠正一下 but there was still one thing I had to make right.
之前 Tony和我分享了他的私人故事 Earlier, Tony shared a personal story with me.
- 你曾经玩过3P吗 - 嗯 玩过 - Have you ever had a threesome? - I have, yes.
然后我不小心跟其中几位女生讲了 And I accidentally told it to some of the women.
他说他和两个男人做过3P He was saying he had a threesome with two guys.
- 和两个男的吗 - 是的 - With two guys? - Yeah.
而现在我想要道歉 And now I wanted to apologize.
我现在才发现 I'm realizing now,
也许我不该提起Tony的个人经历 perhaps it was wrong to bring up Tony's personal experience he had
和两个男人在舒适的家里做运动的经历 in the comfort of his own home with two men.
- 我已经听过这事儿了 - 对 3P的事 - I already heard the story. - Yeah. Yeah, the threesome.
- 他和两个男的吗 - 是的 - Him with two guys? - Yeah.
噢 不是和两个男的 Oh, but not with two guys.
那是一个男的一个女的吗 Well, was it one guy, one girl?
- 还是和两个女的 - 不说了 - Or was it two girls? - Nah.
- 这重要吗 - 对啊 这根本不重要 - Why is that important? - Exactly. That's not important.
而且就算他做了 那也是人家自己的事 And even if he did, it's his own business.
- 对 我们无所谓啊 - 是啊 我们不在乎的 - Yeah, we don't care. - Yeah, we don't care.
- 没错 - 没关系的 - Yeah. - It's all good.
所以我为此道歉 So I apologize for that,
我不希望有任何不愉快 and I don't want to have any hard feelings--
- 没有不愉快 - 留在我们之间 - No hard feelings. - between us.
- 好吧 没问题 - 那好 - Yeah, all right. - All right.
你不再害怕了吗 Your fears are all gone?
他是个大好人 真的 He's a great guy. He really is.
只是你见到的而已 From what you know of.
- 噢 你不是吗 - 不 我是个大好人 - Oh, you're not? - No, I'm a great guy.
那你为什么说"只是你见到的而已" Why'd you say, "From what you know of"?
只是你见到的我而已 Well, from what you know of me.
但我才夸你是个大好人 Yeah, but I just called you a great guy.
你为什么要争这点 Why are you arguing against that?
你是个好人吗 Are you a good guy?
随着女人们的离去 我对自己充满了自信 As the women were leaving, I felt confident in myself.
知道如果我以后想找真爱的话 Knowing that if I ever wanted to find love--
谢谢大家 Thank you.
我只需要再重新做一档假的真人秀就行了 I could just create a fake reality show all over again.
啊 Ahh!
你吓到了吗 Were you scared?
我建的这个鬼屋 I built the haunted house,
所以我知道惊吓点都在哪 所以 so I know where everything is, so...
- 那吓到了吗 - 并没有 - So, yes? - So, no.
好吧 算你牛 All right... Pretty good.
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